Alpha Jax was beginning to think of what he just did. He just threatened someone who has his life in her hands. Someone that he cannot defeat on a normal day. Someone whose strength is not raw power like his. She could control things from afar or even with her mind. He knew he should not have gone all defensive about Ava.
“Why did I even do that?” He asked himself why he protected Ava. He looked around and went to the window again. Most of the sex slaves have left. Just two left having sex under a large tree. Alpha Jax ignored it. He left the window.
“Would I have ignored it on a normal day? Good goddess,” he returned to the tree only to discover that the two of them were running away. One of them must have notice him and informed the other, hence the reason they ran away.
“Do you think that’s what makes you superior?” Alpha Jax father voice came through from the behind. Alpha Jax turned sharply and looked at his father.
“It does not matter father. My generation has a different meaning of supremacy. I define what supremacy is, I set the standards,” he said and talked back to his father without fear. He moved away from the window and went close to where he see his father.
“Father! I am sorry I could not live up to your standards, but I define what happens now. I dictate it,” Alpha Jax said.
“That’s not you. That’s not your essence. That’s not what you are supposed to be. You have the wrong definition of everything. You do not set any standards. You are only scared,” his father told him.
“Father, what am I scared of uhn? Tell me what am I scared of?”
“You are scared of falling in love and being called a good Alpha. You fear if you become a good and considerate person you will loose touch to what makes you strong. But you won’t,” his father informed him.
“How do you know?”
“Son, there are different things fueling us. There are different things that give us essence of our being. You could let love fuel you. The love you have for those close to you, will strengthen you. The need to protect them will give you better purpose, and self love for what you are, will strengthen you spiritually. Let love take the charge of you son. It’s time for a change. Let the change begin working through you. Let it envelope you,” his father prophesied and disappeared. At the same time, he jerked up from sleep.
“Have I been sleeping?” He questioned himself.
“When did I sleep?” He remembers everything that happened between the moment the witch came in and when he saw the slaves at the window. He did not sit to rest at all. So when did he sleep to have such a dream.
Alpha Jax sat down upright to think about the things he saw in his dream. Especially the dream with his father and the appearance of the witch. He wonders why he would want to protect Ava. Okay, maybe he might protect his property, but not to the extent of threatening a wit h who rendered him powerless the first time they met.
Alpha Jax thought of the request of the witch. It was too much of her to ask. The bargain does not make sense. It’s too selfish and unachievable. Why would he sacrifice two Alphas and werewolves just so he could get something from a witch. He wondered why he had agreed to such thing in the first place with the other witch. And he does not like the fact that he still agrees to it, with this witch.
He knows it would be bad enough to sacrifice the lives of Alphas, not to say, sacrificing it to witches. Witches are the current lowest in the heirachy of supernaturals. Even though werewolves wiped out Vampires around America, when it comes to it, the witches are still the least. So he wonders why he has to sacrifice so much to a witch that would posses powers that would not just surpass an Alpha. But a power that would rival the moon goddess. It would be something insane. Alpha Jax knows he dare not grant her her request. He would rather fight against her with other Alphas, than submit Alphas to her.
“How did I go that low?”
And for the dream he had with his father, he tried not to associate so many meaning to it. How would love fuel his strength. In the history of all werewolves ever, he has never heard of where strength from love triumph over strength from pure hatred and anger. Rage always triumph but his dad’s ghost just told him to love. He should love people and allow himself he loved, then he would be strong.
Alpha Jax knows he loves his sister, and his mom. He accepts then. He cares for them and at all times, he shows them affection when he can. When it comes to women that are not relatives, he does not think he would respect them a bit. They do not deserve his love not attention. The last woman whom he had given his love had betrayed him.
“How can you judge every female werewolf by the action of one misguided little girl,” his conscience pinched him. Alpha Jax tried ignoring it. He would shut the sound away but it keeps coming back. He knows what he heard from his father must be nonsense. Something impossible. But if there is something he remembers about his father whilst the old man was alive, he was never wrong. His father never lied. His father might have a wrong opinion, however when it comes to matter of facts, numbers and reality, his father was never wrong. And he promised he would give loving someone else a chance.
“I felt something was wrong today. I did not know what and how. I needed to find what is wrong and how to solve it. Maybe I will start with experimenting what it feels like to love and be loved again. The next problem is who should I love. Who am I supposed to live apart from my family members?” he soliloquized.