By the time I got onto the road, Benedict had called me, telling me that the paramedics had already gotten to Jane and rushed her to the nearest hospital in midtown. I immediately swerved mid-road at the news, making a giant u-turn toward the address that he had sent me.
My mind was all over the place by the time I arrived at the hospital. All I could focus on was my need to see Jane with my own two eyes.
I haphazardly parked the car in the drop-off zone. I had rushed into the emergency room in such a flurry that I frightened several nurses as I made a beeline to the front counter.
I frantically spurted out to the receptionist, “My wife! She was admitted here a few minutes ago! Where is she?!”
Her eyes grew wide at the sight of my panicked figure. I must’ve looked like a crazed beast, but she managed to regain her bearings relatively quickly and replied in a soothing tone, “Sir, everything is going to be alright. I need you to calm down first so we can locate your wife together.”
I nodded mindlessly, not quite registering her words as my eyes fluttered frantically around the room in search of my wife.
She tried calling out to me a couple more times, but I couldn’t focus on her words due to how overwhelming everything felt.
All the rushing carts, the coughs, the sneezes, the painful groans, the strong scent of antiseptics…
Why wasn’t she here?
Where was she?
She wouldn’t have passed away on the way here, right?
Panic flooded my system as my thoughts spiraled into all the worse case scenarios.
Luckily, a familiar pair busted through the front door before I could break down. A small wave of relief washed over me when I spotted Liam situated safely in Benedict’s arms.
I immediately snatched my son from Benedict’s arms and held his little body close to my chest.
I didn’t care about how he was covering my pure white shirt in blood. All I cared was that he was safe.
I still had no clue about what had happened. All I could do was just be glad that at least one of my angels was still alright and unharmed.
Sobs broke through the moment he landed in my arms. He clung desperately to my shirt and choked out, “Dad… Mom… S-She wouldn’t stop bleeding… S-she’s going to o-okay, r-right? We c-can’t lose her.”
I hushed him softly as I pulled his head into the safety of the crook of my neck, blindly reassuring him, “It’s going to be okay, honey… Mom is very strong… She’s going to be okay… She has to be okay.”
It was almost as if I was trying to reassure myself, rather than Liam. I felt so weak at the moment, weaker than I had ever felt even my life, at the thought of possibly losing one of the most important people in my life.
But I knew I had to stay strong for Liam.
I couldn’t leave him alone to fend for himself after all that had happened.
Drawing me out of my thoughts, I felt a soft tap on my shoulder, making me immediately turn around in response.
I must’ve looked like a mess because Benedict’s eyes immediately softened when he caught sight of my expression.
But I didn’t care.
All I wanted to know was Jane’s status.
Understanding my unspoken question, he quietly replied, “She’s in room 401. Still unconscious but at least no longer bleeding and stable.”
I nodded as a silent thank you before bolting off in the direction that he had motioned to, holding Liam close to me as I wove my way through the crowded hospital.
Just like he had said, I found Jane’s name on one of the clipboards outside of a room on the fourth floor. I hurriedly pushed the door open, startling the nurses inside, who were still tending to Jane’s wounds.
My breath hitched when I spotted Jane’s limp body lying on the hospital bed. She had a bandage wrapped around her head, and several other bruises and scratches scattered across the rest of her body.
If it weren’t for the heart monitor’s consistent beeping, I would’ve thought that she had been halfway to the afterlife already by how pale her face was.
How could I have let this happen to her?
I knew that it wasn’t safe.
I should have ignored her pleas and kept her guards glued to her side at work.
I should have tried harder to get her to quit her job.
She might’ve been unhappy about it at first, but at least she wouldn’t have been lying half-dead in this wretched place.
My body was so tense, so deep into my thoughts, that I didn’t notice the doctor coming up behind me and nearly broke the woman’s arm when she tried to get my attention.
My eyes widened when I realized what I had done, and quickly released her arm, muttering a quick apology.
“It’s alright, sir. I would be just as anxious if I were in your place.” Straightening herself back out, she calmly excused the nurses to give us some privacy and motioned to a chair in the corner of the room. “Your wife is in good hands, so please ease your nerves and allow yourself to sit down for a moment. It will do no one any good if you accidentally snap.”
I sighed and obediently followed her directions, knowing that she was only telling the truth.
I pulled the chair out to Jane’s bedside and reluctantly eased myself into the seat, keeping Liam securely situated in my lap. I loosely laced my fingers with Jane’s cold hands, needing to feel her skin against me, needing the reassurance that she was still here as my eyes fluttered across her unconscious figure.
The doctor continued, “From the looks of it, your wife is currently unconscious due to a hard blunt trauma to her head. She has a concussion and will probably be out for at least the next 24 hours. Besides this, she did not experience any other major injuries, just a few scratches and rough bruises from her apparent fall. However, we were not able to save the baby…”
My fingers squeezed Jane’s hand at the news.
Fuck…
“She was on the cusp of her first trimester, nearly ten weeks into her pregnancy… But the time she arrived at the hospital, she had already miscarried… There was nothing I could do… I’m sorry…”
A lump formed in the base of my throat as my ears droned out the rest of the doctor’s words.
She was pregnant…
Ten weeks…
The first time when Jane had trusted me with her entire self…
All her weird food cravings and mood swings…
She was carrying our child this entire time and I never realized….
I bit the inside of my cheek as the urge to cry welled up inside my chest.
How could I be so reckless as to lose my child before I could even meet them?
Not only that, I nearly lost my own wife…
She trusted me to take care of them…
How would I even face her after this?
A tiny hand slid over the back of my hand, snapping me out of my trance. Realizing how tightly I was squeezing Jane’s hand, I quickly loosened my grip and looked down at the little one who was rubbing the back of my hand.
“It’s going to be okay, Dad… All that matters is that Mom is going to be alright… We can sort everything else out later…”
A small smile formed on my lips as I watched my son try to comfort me. I kissed the side of his temple softly, “You’re right… We should just be happy that she’s going to be alright…”
Even though he was trying to act strong for my sake, I knew that he was just as worried and anxious about Jane as I was.
Breaking our little moment, the doctor continued softly, “Based on how we found her, we worked on the assumption that she had fallen down the stairwell and the brunt of the fall had been the cause for her injuries. But, by any chance, were either of you present during the accident? We would be able to treat her better if we could get a full idea of what had happened.”
“I… wasn’t there when it happened, but my son was the one who found her first and I’m not sure if he even saw what happened…” I glanced down at Liam worriedly, knowing that he was probably still frazzled by what had happened. Despite his currently calm demeanor, he was still covered in his mom’s blood. No kid would be alright after such an event. “You don’t have to talk if you’re not comfortable, Liam… But if there was anything that you might’ve seen, do you think you can tell the doctor?”
His grip tightened against my shirt. His lips were pressed into a thin line as if he was in pain from remembering what had happened.
I didn’t want to make him recall something he didn’t want to remember, but he had lifted his head off of my chest before I could retract my question.
He looked up at the doctor warily and started, “I-I didn’t see everything, but I heard some of it… Mom was in a meeting, and I was waiting in her office like she told me to… But she was taking longer than usual to come back even though it was well passed the time of the end of her meeting, so I snuck out of her office to look for her… I heard her voice when I passed by the entrance to the side stairwell… There was another woman’s voice shouting at her, and before I knew it, I heard a loud thud. I threw the door open and found her lying frighteningly still at the bottom of the stairs with blood flowing out from the back of her head and between her legs… I was so freaked out, so scared, that I didn’t get a good look at the other woman before she ran out… My only thought was that I needed to save her somehow… I couldn’t think clearly… I completely forgot about 911 and called dad first… Maybe if I had been a bit smarter… if I had just called 911 first… then I wouldn’t have lost my little brother or sister…”
His voice wavered at the end. His lower lip was trembling when he looked up at me. It was as if he was silently begging me not to be mad at him.
It tore at my heart to see him like this.
If he could be blamed for such a tiny detail, then I was even more responsible for Jane’s injuries.
If I had just ignored Rose, I probably would’ve gotten to her office in time to prevent all of this happening.
But thinking about the what if’s wouldn’t change anything.
Trying to assign blame wouldn’t help with anything.
And I most definitely didn’t want my son to harbor this feeling, to feel as though he was the one who killed his unborn sibling when in reality, person who maliciously pushed Jane down the stair was the actual murder of our child.
I engulfed him in my arms, trying to ease his trembling figure. “Don’t think like that, Liam… It wasn’t your fault… It would never be your fault… You did well to call me… You even managed to find Uncle Benedict even though you were so scared… You saved mom, and I can’t possibly ask for more from you… I’m proud of you, and I’m sure mom would feel the same…”
The doctor nodded in agreement, “Based on your description, the baby most likely passed away on impact… Apparently it was a long flight of stairs and she had hit the wall pretty harshly at the bottom… Even if you had called us first, we probably still wouldn’t have been able to save it… So please don’t blame yourself, little one… You did your best…”
Liam nodded solemnly, slowly shutting down from all the stress as he buried himself in the safety of my arms.
I stroked his head gently, understanding that he could no longer resist the exhaustion settling into his little body now.
Noting Liam’s fading consciousness, the doctor lowered her voice and changed her tone to formally address me, “I assume you want to handle this case by yourself… I will make sure none of your information will be leaked to the public, Mr. Cordova.”
I nodded, glad that she knew how to change her tone and respect my special case. It was no secret that I was the famous head of the Cordova family, who not only ruled the business world but also controlled more than 90% of New York City.
Every person involved in the legal system knew not to get on my bad side. I wasn’t someone bound by their usual rules.
But even so , I still wasn’t able to keep my wife safe…
“Feel free to use the shower in the attached bathroom to clean up. I will ask one of the nurses to bring up a change of clothes for you and your son.” She lowered her head to me and continued, “Please rest assured that I will treat your wife to the best of my abilities, Mr. Cordova.”
I nodded mutely, feeling too tired to acknowledge her with anything more than a simple nod.
She left the room without any word, shutting the door soundlessly behind her at her departure.
I rubbed my thumb over the back of Jane’s cold hand as my eyes drifted across her still body.
A jumble of emotions was rolling about inside of me.
The tormenting anguish from seeing my angel in such a state.
The heartwrenching pain from losing a precious one that I never got to meet.
A heavy mind-numbing sense of guilt for letting my loved ones down, for not being there when they needed me.
But most of all, an overwhelming sense of fury at the one who dared to harm my woman.
Pressing a kiss to the back of her hand, I vowed that I would find every last person involved and make them pay for what they had done. I would make them wish they were dead, for it would be less painful than what I would do to them when I get my hands on them.
“I failed you once already, but I promise that I will keep you safe this time. I will make ever last one of them pay for your pain, so please just let me see your beautiful eyes one more time.”