Ayato
After Emily’s death, I promised myself not to love anymore. Even if it’s a hard promise to keep, I still said it. But look at me not keeping it.
It’s true that I’m falling fast in love with Adaline, but I know that my first love was Emily, and it will always be.
That’s the heartbreaking truth. I never got past Emily’s death. I loved her and I still do. More than ever. More than anyone. Not even the growing love I hold for Adaline could overthrow the love I still hold for Emily. As sad as it sounds, I’m still not over her death and I’ll never will.
But I can still hope that my love for Addy will grow and I could finally forget about Emily. I’m sorry, Emily. But it’s too hard for me to let my heart still cling onto the memories of you.
Your smile.
Your laugh.
Your eyes.
I have to forget about them.
My chest feels heavy. I can’t breathe anymore. I’m scared. I’m scared that I have to move on. I’m scared of change.
I closed my eyes and sighed, reopening them.
I just want to rewind everything and not have gone to the party with her. I should’ve stopped her. I should’ve stayed with her.
My eyes slowly closed, black surrounding me.
***
My eyes shot open, my heart beating fast. I looked around. The library. What am I doing here?
“Please, Ian! One party, I swear! Just one!” A familiar voice pleaded, my arm being shaken by two gentle and warm hands. I snapped my head to the side, my heart’s speeding up more and more.
Emily?
Thump. Thump. Thump.
No… it can’t be real…
“E-Emily, i-is that you?” I asked, putting the book I was holding on the table in front of me. I got up, and gripped Emily’s shoulders.
She gave me a weird look. “Uh, duh! The one and only!” She joked, laughing. “So, about the party…”
I blinked, beginning to understand. Maybe I have a second chance…
“Yeah, no…”
“What?!” She exclaimed. “Please! Just this one party!”
I shook my head and proceed to walk away from the library’s school, with Em trailing after me.
“Please, please, please, Ian! What if I die toni-” My feet came to a halt while I turned around fast, my jaw clenched, my eyes hard.
“Don’t you even think about saying that,” I warned her, my eyes narrowing to slits. She widened her eyes a little bit, stepping back.
“Woah, calm down! If you get angry that much, you don’t have to come to the party. I’m going alone,” She decided, and walked past me, her shoulder brushing slightly with mine.
I turned around and watched her. She was walking slowly as if she was waiting for me to call for her.
That wasn’t going to happen.
I don’t want the past to repeat.
But… if I don’t go with her, she might get drunk again and do something that will put her in danger.
I sighed. “Emily…”
She stopped, and turned around with a grin. She gave out a squeal, and came running towards me. She opened her arms and hugged me.
“Thank you! Thank you! Thank you!”
I laughed, and hugged her back.
I just hope that she’ll survive this time.
***
“No , Em, no more drinking! Em!” I shouted at her through the music blasting in the house.
“Oh c’mon, Ianny-boo! Just one more shot!” She almost gulped down another shot of whiskey , but I was fast and stole it from her lips until she got the chance to even taste from it.
She pouted, her red lipsticked bottom lip sticking out. A sudden feeling of déjà vu hit me, making a shiver travel down my spine.
“Hey! That was my drink!” She protested, but something caught her eye making her snap her head to the right.
I shut my eyes closed, not wanting to look.
“Let’s go take a tour of the town.”
And there is the sentence that I hate the most.
I opened my eyes and looked straight into her sparkly eyes. I gulped.
“No, Em. You’re drunk. We’re just gonna stay here. I’m gonna stay with you, and make sure that nothing happens to you,” I said calmly. Well, as calmly as I could over the loud music in the party. Emily pouted.
“Okay…” She trailed off, sadness coating the tone of her voice. My heart hurt at her voice, but I knew that this was for her best.
Her eyes wandered on the dance floor, then fixed on something. I followed her gaze, but couldn’t exactly catch what she was watching.
“I like that girl’s dress,” She suddenly said, gesturing to a girl in a red, strapless dress who was trying to get out of the sea of people on the dance floor along with another girl beside her.
She had blonde hair and her friend had brunette hair. I couldn’t really see their faces as the people were dancing and moving around, blocking my view of them.
As I watched closer, I saw that the brunette left the blonde. I frowned.
The now left alone girl had her arms crossed over her chest, her face downwards.
She turned around, and began to leave in the other direction. I raised myself up so I could watch her. Something was pulling me to her, but I didn’t know what. I think… I know her…
My eyes suddenly widened.
No… it can’t be…
I touched Em’s shoulder, my eyes still watching the blonde girl that was leaving. I felt Em’s burning gaze on the side of my face.
“Em. Stay here.”
I began to walk away, trying to follow the mysterious girl that had me attracted towards her.
I began to get closer and closer towards her. She suddenly stopped, and I realized that we arrived at the kitchen’s door.
She turned around, and let out a startled shriek. She put her hands over her chest, my heart beating just as fast as I thought hers would be beating, seeing as I scared her. Just that… my heart wasn’t beating because I scared her or someone scared me. No. It was beating because… this girl…
Is Adaline.
“What the hell, you creep! Stop following me!” She screamed at me, her face red from anger. I watched her in awe, and raised my hand to touch her. She scowled at me, and slapped my hand away.
A smile tugged at the corners of my lips. “Adaline? Is that really you?”
She rolled her eyes, and crossed her arms over her chest. “No, it’s grandma. Of course that it’s Adaline! And may I ask, who the hell are you and why are you following me?”
“My name is Ay–Ian, and I was following you because you looked familiar,” I told her truthfully. She scoffed.
“Yeah, I haven’t even seen you once in my life and you tell me that I look familiar. Cut the crap, and just tell me that you’re just trying to get into my sister’s pants by using me,” She glared at me, the simple look making me want to laugh. She looked just as an angry kitten. It’s cute.
Once her words registered in my head, I raised my eyebrows. “I’m not trying to get into Jemima’s pants.”
“How do you even know her name?!” She shrieked. I opened my mouth to speak but she was quick and raised up her hand to stop me. “Wait, don’t answer that. Everybody knows Jemima.”
I shook my head. “Anyways, I’m not trying to get into your sister’s pants because I already have a girlfriend,” I told her, my face suddenly going pale, the blood in my veins cold.
“And who is that girl gonna be– Hey! Are you alright?” This time she had her eyebrows furrowed, a concerned look on her face.
“Y-yeah,” I said, my mind elsewhere. “I-I have to go.”
I didn’t wait for a response and left, making my way through the incredulous amount of people that fit in this place.
Finally, I opened the door, the fresh air hitting my skin.
I went outside, and that’s when I saw it. The past repeating. Emily in the car. Me screaming after her, then the explosion.
Again, I dropped on my knees, and began to cry, but this time everything fell silent. I raised up my head and saw that I was … nowhere, everything around me black. I stood up startled and turned around fast.
There was a picture of Adaline and one of Emily. The picture of Adaline was one that I secretly took of her when she was sleeping in her room. I kinda… sneaked in her room at night… Don’t tell her.
And the other picture with Emily was the one that I have on the wall in my room in that cottage.
I looked between the two of them, not understanding what was happening. Slowly, Emily’s picture began to fade away. I widened my eyes and ran towards it. Extending my arm I tried reaching for it, and when I was about to touch it– it disappeared.
My eyes widened, and my heartbeat fastened. Emily…
In the background, I heard a voice faint and distant.
“You’ve made your choice, Ian. You have to let me go.”
I shot up from the bed like it burned me, my heart beating incredibly fast, the world spinning around me.
Million thoughts came into my mind, making my heart beat faster and faster.
Was that just a dream?
Did I really choose Adaline?
Was that really Emily who spoke to me?
“You’ve made your choice Ian. You have to let me go.”
I groaned, and tugging at my hair I plopped myself down on the bed. I turned my head to the side and saw that outside was still night.
Adaline wasn’t here, but I already know she won’t come here. Tomorrow will be my birthday and it’s been a few days since the incident with Samantha kissing me.
I heard that Samantha left, returning home. I couldn’t be more than happy with her leaving. What was in her head? Did she just want to hurt her cousin?
Speaking of cousins, Finnegan should be sleeping on floor right now.
Jemima took Adaline in her room, and sent Finn over here. Till now, Finn was refusing to sleep in the same bed as me, saying that: “Girls do that!”
I turned over on the bed, and took my phone from the nightstand. Turning on my phone, I used the phone’s light to watch around. Surely, Finn was sleeping down on the floor.
Do I really have to carry him to bed?
Nah…
But he looks like he isn’t sleeping very well…
“Ugh…” I groaned, and raised up from the bed.
***
My mother clapped her hands, an excited look on her face. My father was sitting beside her, sighing at my mother’s excitement.
“So, mother…” I trailed off, all the guys and I watching her. “Why did you gather us all here?”
Adaline was far from me, sitting on a couch while I was sitting on the other couch.
“I called you all here to announce you what we’re gonna do today,” Mom chirped. I raised my eyebrows, my phone vibrating in my hands.
I turned it on and saw that I have a new message from Jemima.
Jem: What’s this all about?
Me: Idk, don’t ask me.
Jem: Rse
I glared at my phone’s scream.
Me: Don’t roll your eyes at me.
Jem: I CAN DO WHATEVER I WANT!
Me: STOP SCREAMING!
Jem: I DON’T WANT TO!
Me: JUST SHUT UP!
Jem: NO!
Me: YES!
Jem: NU-UH!
I almost wrote another messages, but my mother stopped me.
“Ayato and Jemima, please put your phones away and listen to what I have to say,” She gave us a glare making both of us turn off our phones. She smiled. “Good.”
I looked at Jemima, and she looked back at me. We glared at each other. She stuck her tongue out at me, making me scowl at her.
With the corner of my eye, I saw Adaline watching us. My heart began to beat faster, and I turned my attention to my mother. I tried.
“So, Ayato. As you know today is your birthday,” My mother said, a goofy smile on her face.
I give her a bored look. “And…?”
“And…” She trailed off looking at my father. He looked back at her with the same bored look I had on my face.
My mom hit my father with her elbow in the stomach.
“What?”
Mom gave him an incredulous look and nodded her head at us. Dad shrugged his shoulders.
“What?!”
She groaned. “Never mind…”
She turned to us and gave us a big smile. “We’re gonna celebrate your birthday at….”
I raised my eyebrows at her.
Her eyes sparkled, and she was almost bouncing on her feet.
“At the Fair!” She exclaimed, happy.
I sighed. This much excitement for just going to a Fair for my birthday.
I feel my phone vibrating again in my hands. I furrowed my eyebrows and turned on my phone. It was another text from Jemima.
Jem: I have a plan.