The next morning seemed different to me as I decided to move on from everything. It was really hard but I won’t give up. For myself. I stood in front of the mirror combing my hair. When I looked at myself I was just seeing a flesh without any life. I let out a sigh and tried to add life so I plastered a smile across my lips.
“Perfect.” I rolled my eyes mumbling.
I took my books and walked out of my room. Anna was already waiting for me so without wasting the time we both strolled to the college. While walking I told Anna “Anna! I will try to move on from everything.”
Anna nodded her head smiling and we reached our college. I decided to be the Stella whom I was before Harry. When I was concentrating on my classes, the dance club volunteers entered in informing all the dancers had to be assembled at the dancing room evening. Whenever they enter the classroom my face used to lit up but this time I sat like a stone with no emotions. I was not at all interested in those things as it kept reminding me of him. I turned my head aside to see Harry and to my surprise, he was already staring at me.
Then I shifted my gaze to my book and the volunteers left. The classes went as usual boring and after few long hours they were ended. Anna and I walked out silently. I didn’t want to go to the dance room so I kept walking with Anna.
“You are not going? To the dance club’s meeting.” Anna asked stopping her walk.
I nodded her head sideways saying “No. I’m not interested.”
“So you are not participating in the competition?”
“Nope.”
“You should atleast inform them about this. You can’t just ignore it, right?”
I thought for a while and decided to go. Not to get involved in any meeting but to inform I will be not in the part of the competition anymore. I asked Anna to wait for me for few minutes and she accepted.
I walked to the room and saw everyone there including Harry. I didn’t understand why he arrive when he didn’t even want to look at his dance partner. I sat on the chair listening to them. They had been telling the new themes that would attract the judges, the setup and few other things. I ignored everything and patiently waited for the moment to inform them about my withdrawal.
After few minutes they concluded and everyone started to talk with their partners. I strolled to them saying “Hey! I want to inform you something.”
“Tell me, Stella. Do you have any theme idea in your head? By the way where is your partner?” A blondie turned her side to Harry smiling. He smiled back seeing her.
“No. I’m not here for that. I… I’m not interested in this competition. I want to withdraw from it.”
The volunteers eyes’ widened listening to me. One of them asked “What about your partner?”
I shrugged my shoulders saying “I don’t know.” I muttered in a low voice “And I don’t care.”
They called Harry and he walked towards us. They told him what I informed. He looked at me clenching his jaw.
“Harry! What about you? You want to convince your partner or…”
“No. I don’t want to.” He stated.
“You can’t dance without a partner.” The blondie said.
“I’ve a partner.”
My eyes widened hearing his answer. I looked at him crossing my arms.
He continued saying “Many days back a girl asked me and I rejected so she dropped from the competition as she had no partner. She will be my partner now.”
“What if she rejects now? The competition is so near. How can you both manage?” The blondie asked.
“She won’t. Only fools reject someone like me.” He sounded so arrogant. “We can manage.”
I let out a sigh and rolled my eyes. Then I strolled away from there angrily. I saw Anna was with Roman, talking. She noticed my arrival and strolled towards me. We both then walked to our houses talking. I told her everything that happened there.
“Are you completely okay to see Harry being someone’s partner?” She asked.
“Yes. I don’t care about him. I don’t care whether he talk to someone, dance with other girl or fuck any…” I put my hand on my eyes to stop the tears that were ready to fall down while swallowing the lump in my throat.
Anna put her palm on my shoulder. Before she said anything to comfort me, I said “I’m fine, Anna. Just… leave.”
We then strolled away and I reached my house. Angrily I ran to my room and sat on the bed slamming the bed beside me. I tried so hard to control my emotions but I failed. Even the smile that I plastered on my face was gone. I realized moving on was not that easy as my words.
I started to draw to deviate myself from his thoughts but it was not working. I tried to do many things to distract myself from the thoughts but it was getting impossible as even the window from which he used to enter in, was reminding me of him. I stood from my place, strolled to it and shut the window angrily.
While I was in my works, I heard my mom calling out my name. Closing everything I strolled out. My lips curved up with smile when I saw granny sat on the sofa.
“Granny?” I ran to her smiling.
She embraced me gently mumbling “Stella!”
We then sat on the sofa talking to eachother while my mom strolled to the kitchen to prepare dishes for granny.
Granny asked “What happened between you and Harry? I noticed you both are not talking to eachother. You barely come there. I had been asking Harry but he was ignoring it.”
“Not like that… we…” I tried to lie but she held my hand saying “Tell me the truth.”
I tried to be strong but tears started welling up in my eyes. Controlling them, I replied “We had a fight. A big fight and we both stopped talking to eachother.”
“Why did you get into a fight? About what?”
“About… our relationship. I thought something about Harry but I was wrong.”
“Stella! Fights are common in this age. Don’t ruin your friendship with him. He likes you a lot more than his all other friends.”
It’s not friendship granny. I can’t tell you what I had been feeling about him and what we went through.
My mom came out of the kitchen and sat along with us. They both kept talking and my dad joined later. After spending few minutes with us she left.
As usual I went to the college the next day. I noticed Harry was not in the class. I tried my best to ignore it but I couldn’t so I asked Anna about him. She shrugged her shoulders saying “I don’t know.”
Anna didn’t attend the next class as Roman asked her to spend some time with him. She rejected as she didn’t want to leave me alone but I convinced her to go. After an hour of class, I walked to the library to take few books. While I was strolling to my classroom, I heard the music from the dance practice room. At first I ignored it but when I heard the theme music that Harry and I decided for the dance, my curiosity asked me to peep in. I saw Harry and a girl practicing there. I kept seeing them through the window. I understood he was practicing in the dance room not in his house but it’s the least thing I cared. He was dancing with some other girl. It’s not me. I was getting jealous and of course tears too. I recalled the moment when I was with Rory, he showed up and danced for me saying “This is for my girlfriend. My Stella.” just to be his dance partner. There was no his girlfriend, no his Stella anymore. He was with some other, dancing and teaching her the steps.
I felt a palm on my shoulder and I turned back to see Anna. I hugged her crying “He got a new dance partner.”
She hugged me back saying “You said you will move on.”
“I’m trying but it’s really hard, Anna. It feels like my heart has been stabbing with the knife many times. I’m really a weak girl.”
“Stella! Time heals everything. Take time. Don’t be hard on yourself.” I nodded my head and left the place ignoring their bloody dance.