Kate
I have an appointment today with the doctor and she said I should also bring Alex cause she thinks husband should be more involved in the pregnancy but how can I tell her my case to her but I’m stupid girl who always hope, that maybe Alex will go with me. Alex’s parents were out and will join us at dinner time.
Emma was eating and blabbing something Alex was eating his breakfast and reading the newspaper. I thought I should start conversation with something normal
I said ‘ Alex… so when your parents and uncle are coming?…. so that I can look after their room and prepared food before’
He replied ‘ um I guess around 8 but I don’t think so they will stay… they will have dinner. Leave it to Martha she knows very well how to prepare dinner for this many people so you just relax’
I smiled ‘ Alex I loved to cook and secondly I can take Martha help If I become tired but you said lots of people… who else is coming?’
He put down his newspaper and looked uncertain about something. Well I forget to tell you my uncle and aunty are also bringing my cousin Helen. She and I are very closed and she was in the city so I invited her too and since uncle Sam has become friends with your dad so my father thought to called your parents too’
I become a little nervous whenever I think I will meet my parents ‘oh ‘
He noticed my fear and smiled calmly ‘ don’t worry about it… I have already talked to your dad about your situation and well he is not happy but that’s the statement of the year… well try to avoid him and any thing that might make you feel it could create a scene’
I looked so uncomfortable right now not only I’m meeting Alex family so
personally but my parent’s know about my pregnancy and now I have to tell him about the appointment
I nodded and sat beside him. I licked my lips and tugged my hair one of my nervous habit
With great effort and inner talk I speak ‘ Alex there is something else too
He looks up and waited for me to complete what I will say next
I fidget in my seat ‘Actually today is my appointment at noon, my doctor says that she wants you to come too.. She wants to discuss something. I know you are busy but if it’s possible you can come I will really appreciate that may be today we might know the sex of the baby.’… I said it with a shaky smile
Alex replied annoyingly ‘ Kate… what should I do with your appointment. I told you multiple time don’t expect anything from me… you want this baby not me… if you need money then I ask that, not something I can’t commit’
He said this all slowly but so much in anger that my eyes filled with tears. I should be used to this by now but every time it hurts equally bad.
I got up from my place without touching my food
He looks up ‘Kate you have not touch your food’
I wanted to yell at his face why do you care
But then I saw Emma and picked her ‘I’m not hungry and I don’t need money. I will go myself and don’t worry about Emma. Martha is going to be there with her till I reached hospital and tonight dinner going to be prepared on time you won’t be disappointed ‘
And with that I left Alex alone in the dining room.
At noon I reached the hospital and waited for my turn. I saw everyone has come with their partners and they looked so happy not like me who is going to know the gender of her baby without her husband
When my turn came the nurse started looking at my vitals and my blood pressure.
The doctor did my ultrasound and heard my baby voices
The doctor say ‘ Do you want to know the gender’
I said ‘ yeah…(I laughed a little)… if that’s even possible’
The doctor smiled ‘ yes… well looked at the screen here… it look like you’re having a baby girl’
A girl.
Oh my god a daughter!
Is this history repeating itself? I was an unwanted daughter to have ignored all my life.
The doctor concerned voice brought me back ‘ Kate Are you OK. You become so pale and quite’
I flinched and passed her a nervous smile ‘ I’m OK just a little excited… the baby is OK? ‘
The doctor scowled at me.”Baby looks OK for now but you really do have to take care of yourself. Your blood pressure is not normal and there was something else that I needed to discuss with your husband. So where is your husband… I told you to bring him Kate’
I was embarrassed that my husband was not interested in my pregnancy and utterly confused what she want to discuss with Alex
I made an excuse and said ‘ He wanted to come but he has an important meeting today. But you can tell me is everything OK with my pregnancy”
The doctor shook her head in disappointment. ‘Kate you should try to involve your husband too. It takes two to conceive a child. And I don’t want you to worry about it now but you need to be careful. I have been noticing some fluctuation in your blood pressure and today’s test results indicate that if you don’t take care of yourself then there will be lot of complication’
I lost all colour from my face and my eyes tear up ‘What you mean. You told my baby is doing OK’
Doctor passed me a calm smile ‘of course she is but we need to be careful. Your stress and irregular diet can put a normal pregnancy into a great deal of risk. I’m just telling you to be more careful. Don’t worry OK. Today is a happy day celebrate with your family’
I pass her my famous fake smile. Of course it’s good news, but not for my family.
When I reached home. All the time I was thinking I was having a daughter but I don’t know with whom I share this news cause my parents are never interested in me so why would they be interested in my child.
Alex has brutally told me regarding his interest in this pregnancy.
So I went directly to one person who I know will be happy with this news ‘ hi baby girl’
Emma’s eyes beamed with excitement when she saw me and ran to me and yelled’ mama Kate..’
Emma some times calls me mama Kate. This all happened when I was sharing Emily’s fun fact with Emma so that Emma always knew something about her mother even if she is not here. But its was Emma’s innocent mind that told her if Emily is her mama then I’m also her mama cause I married her father
Alex doesn’t know about that and I have no idea how he is going to even react but I leave that tension to another moment
I picked Emma and said ‘ you know Emmie you are going to become a sister… I’m going to have a baby and you will be a big sister’
She made an o face and said’ oh baby… Emma wants a baby… I’m sister’
I laughed ‘ oh yes baby girl you’re going to be soon’
I kissed her head and put her on her play pen and went to the kitchen to make dinner tonight.