Liza had been nervous all day. She had been second guessing her decision and now as she looked at herself in the mirror all dressed up, she still wasn’t sure if she was making the right choice. Liza suddenly wished that there was an on and off switch for the feelings. It would have been so much easier for her, had she been numb, she would have left Jonathan easily without a moment of hesitation but since she still had feelings for him, she had to suffer now. Liza hated being so conflicted. It was difficult not to second guess herself when her heart was on line.
Liza had been through so much pain and she didn’t want to be in pain anymore. It would be difficult and too painful for her to leave Jonathan and it would hurt her too much to stay with Jonathan too. There was no choice that would be painless for her. By choosing to stay with Jonathan her confidence, her self- respect and her values would be compromised but by leaving Jonathan her heart would be ripped apart.
Liza looked at the clock, it read 6:00 pm. Liza had very less time left. She was getting antsier as every second passed bringing her closer to the moment that held the power to break her. She couldn’t believe, she was about to do it. Sure, she had played with the idea of doing it but she had never been sure. Jonathan was her first love. The only person she had truly trusted with her heart. Liza had bared her soul in front of him, to see her strengths, weaknesses and insecurities and it would hurt too much too leave him now. Liza decided to call Alex, he was the only person who could calm her down and stop her from backing out.
Liza heard the phone ring, two or three times, when Alex picked up the phone. “Hello” Alex’s soothing voice spoke from the other end. “Hey, Alex “she said. “What happened Liz? Why are you crying?” he asked. Liza hadn’t realized that her voice had gotten scratchy and sounded as if she had been just crying. She touched her cheek and realized that she indeed was crying. She had been so nervous about her decision that she hadn’t even paid attention to her own tears. “Liz? You there?” Alex asked. Liza wiped her tears and spoke “Yeah, can you come over to my house? I just need a friend right now.” Liza asked “Of course Liz, I will be over in five minutes.” Alex replied. “Okay” Liza said and hung up the phone.
Alex drove as fast as he could. He hated hearing Liza cry especially over Jonathan. He hadn’t even met the man and he hated him with a burning passion. Alex stopped the car in front of Liza’s house and rushed to the door. He knocked twice on the beautiful wooden door and waited. He was about to knock again, when Liza opened the door. Liza looked beautiful, but then again Liza always looked beautiful. She wasn’t a conventional beauty but she had an aura around her which radiated warmth, giving her a beautiful glow. When he looked closely he could see the dark circles around her eyes and there was also a little redness in them indicating that she had been crying.
Instead of inviting Alex in, Liza hugged him taking him by surprise. She wrapped her arms around him tightly as she buried her head in his shoulder. After a few seconds of stunned silence, Alex realized that she was shaking lightly and the wetness on her shoulder unfroze him. He soothingly patted her and ran his hand along her back, trying to calm her down “Shh… Liz. I am here now. Don’t cry, you know how much I hate it when you cry… Tell me what happened.” Liza stepped out from her embrace and tugged his hand silently leading him in. When they were in the house Liza broke down and told him everything from the letter Jonathan had written to the decision.
Alex didn’t like to see Liza cry, but he knew that it was an important and tough decision to Liza and that she would have to make this decision for herself. “Liz, whatever you do know that I am always there to support you. I won’t stop you from leaving Jonathan and neither will I stop you from going back to him.” he said. Liza looked at him and she knew that she will always have Alex as her friend. She looked at the clock and it read 6:55 “Come on Alex, drive me to my destination. I don’t want to be late” Liza said with a light smile. Alex looked at her and saw a kind of fire in her eyes, he knew that there was no turning back now.