The male on the other side of my hip begins to fret not liking that I am standing still so I rock them both swaying my body to the music of the wind. They calm placing their heads into my neck whilst sucking on their thumbs.
“You are quite good with pups, Lumina,” Cronus whispers at my side eyeing up my position.
“I love them. I think they bring joy, laughter and light to a pack. Without these little monsters running around it would be awfully quiet and boring.” I reply with a smile to meet his eyes.
“Is this what you envisioned with Deimos? To have a big family.” He asks.
“Yes. With every breath, I took, as soon as my eyes laid upon his flesh from the very first time.”
“It can still come true, Lumina. I do not know why but I believe.” He says.
“Because we love each other, Cronus. As true friends, we will always support the other. But when you meet your mate and go through every trial and tribulation perhaps than you shall see this situation in a different light.” I mutter.
Yes, this was a situation I dreamt of for a long time. To bear him many pups so his pain of losing a family and my pain of not having one may be healed. And that we would always be surrounded by light and warmth. To hold each other in cold winters and to travel in warm summers. But that was all they were. Dreams.
“Yes, I understand your words. But somehow Lumina, knowing both you and Deimos. The moon shall bless your path with light again. I see your bond’s rebirth.”
I look away my eyes sweeping past the lake. Rebirth he says as if it were truly easy. The moon has counted her every blessing to us and we have used up all of them. I know she has none to gift anymore. She has given upon us and so have I.
“Your eyes, they sadden me. I wish to see them smile again. Truly.” Cronus comes to my right his hand placed upon my head as he pats gently.
“Me too, Cronus. Me too.” I whisper meeting his eyes to gift him with a soft smile.
The rustle of leaves from behind us has the entirety of our attention, whilst we turn swiftly to peek at the intruder. A wolf emerges from the shadows of the dense trees. His head low red eyes blazing peering up at us, his ears are erect and his sooty fur bristles.
Lips pulled back his incisors on display canines glimmering in the light, with low growls that vibrate through his chest pouring out his mouth with displeasure. Eyes looking back and forth from Cronus to me he delivers his warning with another booming snarl.
He stands stiff-legged and tall. His tail held vertical and curled towards the back. A display of an Alpha male to the other showing his dominance. The rank he possesses in this pack grounds we stand upon. He stares penetratingly at Cronus who takes a slow step away from me understanding the situation.
Saliva leaks down his chin showing he is ready to sink his teeth into the flesh of the male that stands at my side. Deimos’s wolf is defensive not liking the proximity between Cronus and me, rather he detests it. He questions it.
Another roar leaves his mouth, his second warning delivered to us. The pups begin to scurry towards us hiding behind our backs many whimpering and crying calling for their mothers.
“Luna. Put the pups you hold, down. Give them to me.” Cronus says at my side not taking his eyes off Deimos’s wolf for if he did for even a second he will pounce and draw blood. I stand astonished staring at this beast whom Deimos kept on a tight leash whilst my wolf whines behind barriers to set her free. She calls to him from within wailing and complaining of how I have kept her bound.
Deimos’s wolf takes a slow step towards Cronus eyes scanning his every moment, a predatory gaze he possesses. He waits patiently for Cronus to make a move, a move that would allow him to go for the kill.
“Listen to me. Deimos and I are brothers but his wolf is ruthless he will make me bleed despite our bond. All he is sees is you and I am a threat in his eyes at this moment. I need to get the pups back safely. So give them to me!” Cronus raises his voice at me a little for I paid no heed to his words whilst he slowly kneels to the ground trying to make his body look small, he arches his back and allows low barks of fake fear to leave his lips. Anything to calm the raging best for there are pups involved.
Deimos has unleashed his wolf after so many months, any and every male he sees near me is a threat. I place the little pups down as they run into Cronus’s open arms that call to them to him. He carries some pups and holds the hands of some. The others quickly make a line behind him as he orders.
“Sit down, Luna. Let him smell you. He must have missed you terribly.” Cronus says his last words to me. He gives a low bow to Deimos’s wolf in respect showing he means no harm. His wolf follows Cronus’s every moment and he does not take his eyes off him until he disappears into the trees the pups hot on his heels.
As soon as Cronus disappears from view I fall to the ground sitting as I was told to. Deimos’s wolf plops down into the position of a sphinx hind legs curled beneath belly tail hanging down its stiffness easing. He is relaxed now.
I offer him a smile. “My King,” I whisper yet my voice trembles. I am uneasy about his feelings towards me for I had abandoned him when he was not at fault.
He watches me for a while, for a few minutes his eyes plunging into mine. It’s as if he is observing me, my changes. My emotions. My soul.
I look away swiftly only to earn a low warning growl which quietens when I peek back at him. He does not wish for me to take my eyes off him. Why do I feel as though I have wronged him?
He takes his calculated slow first step towards me the weight of his paws leaving deep prints in the mud and I hold my breath heart pounding within my chest. He strides with confidence, with purpose towards me.
I do not take my eyes from him as he wishes but somehow I feel ashamed. Deimos betrayed me and I in turn betrayed his wolf by not allowing him near me. He leans forward pressing his wet nose into my neck with quick sniffs he takes in my scent and I lean sideways to provide him with more access.
Then he sniffs my breasts, the smell of my milk a new scent to him. A different one but he understands whom I feed from them. Lastly, he presses his nose between my thighs and I gasp my breath shaky. He takes in a few whiffs of my essence and once satisfied his tension dies.
He speaks to me. Of his feelings. He plops to the ground head placed upon paws as he peeks up at me from beneath his lashes with wet eyes. High pitched whines and whimpers leave his chest his tail tucked in the underbelly. He is upset not understanding my bleeding emotions towards him.
I shut my eyes close unable to see his pain. One that I caused him. “I am sorry.” I apologize from my soul.
His whines reach their peak as he crawls slowly nudging his head upon my legs to lay his head over my lap. An Alpha male who is ruthless, unmerciful whining to his female questioning her of her abandonment.
“I am so sorry.” I apologize again fingertips digging into his fur holding him to me as I push my face into his. My tongue licks his cheek, his nose and his neck. I clean him this way, my act of love towards him. He was innocent in all this yet I couldn’t help but blame Deimos’s soul. His soul that is connected to the soul of his wolf.