There was a pounding in my head. I was confused, and I wanted to throw up. I cracked my eyes but was immediately met with light. A small groan left my lips.
“Ah! Would you look at that Benny boy, she’s finally up! I’ve been waiting for this!” A voice that would forever be scarred into my mind spoke out.
My eyes flew open in fear, disregarding the light that they weren’t used to, and I stopped breathing, my chest constricting in terror. Spots were swimming in my vision, but I still saw him.
Alpha…
He gave a wicked smile. He had a handheld video recorder in his hand as he grinned. He was dressed in a tan t-shirt and a pair of jeans. That belt.
“N-no…” I whispered.
“Oh! What was that slut? Do you have something to say?” he cooed as he came closer to me. I went to move but I soon realized my body was immobilized, tied down to a bed I didn’t recognize. I wanted to look at the room, but my eyes wouldn’t leave him.
My heart was beating so hard, I had no doubt you could see it. I choked before I sucked in a breath. I needed air and I was getting none. Tears stung at my eyes the closer he came to me. He pointed the camera at me and climbed to the foot.
“Aw, babykins, are you gonna have a little attack? Huh? Want your inhaler?” he teased. I was shaking and he straddled my knees, moving up. I had an instinct to protect my stomach from him, my whole abdomen. Mainly because Sage was on alert and I couldn’t cover it. My body jolted in repulsion, a sob leaving my lips. “Oh, feisty today, huh?” he smirked down and led the camera up and down my body.
He shoved it towards my face as he grabbed it, my tears coating his fingers. “Look at that Benny. Isn’t she precious?” I gasped for breath and tried to tear my face away but he quickly smacked me. He let out a deep, sarcastic sigh. “See, our Benny boy never disciplined you…” he tsk-ed as he slapped me again.
Perspiration started to dot my forehead, my vision spun for a second as the weight on my chest doubled. I shook with a choked sob.
“Aww, Benny, I think we made her cry… You’ll love what I have planned, I’m sure Benny will love to watch it. But, let’s start by welcoming you back.” He grinned as I heaved in apprehension.
His nails elongated as he slid his hand down my shirt, tearing it apart. I couldn’t breathe. He ripped through my bra and flicked them to the slide as he palmed my breasts, filming it all the while.
I sobbed and struggled beneath him, but that just caused him to growl and slap me. My throat shut off my air entirely. I gasped, my head pounding with a lack of oxygen.
“Benny, look at her. Look at how my fuck toy responds. Hot, isn’t it?” he went down to my pants and tore them open, my button popping off. Hot tears were streaming down my face and I started to see black dots cloud my vision. I passed out when he shoved his fingers in me.
I kept slipping in and out of my black void. Passing out from fear and lack of oxygen. Chris just kept filming, often making demeaning comments.
“Benny boy, look at how my mate reacts.”
“I’m just making her so wet, aren’t I?”
“I’m glad you didn’t use her too often. Tight matey. Aren’t you babykins?”
He relentlessly pounded away. I’d spring my eyes open, see what he was doing, cry, he’d look at me, make some comments and hit me again and I’d pass back out.
I opened my eyes again and saw that I was alone. I glanced around the wooden room, no one was here. Not a trace.
Tears fell as I examined the place I was in. It looked like a cabin-type of cellar. Dark wooden walls and floors with one door to the side and a light on. No windows. Just this bed.
I glanced down at my body and cringed. There was blood coating my legs, streaming from my area. That happened often. He’d just invade me with no care in the world and I would be too dry to come out with no internal injuries. I bit my lip as I saw rope tied to my ankles, holding me to the bedpost, I looked at my wrists to see the same. They were digging right into the bandages that Benylam put on.
I winced.
I wanted him.
‘He doesn’t want you. ‘
I clamped my eyes shut as my body shook, the image of him and the girl on his lap replaying in my mind.
… I deserved this…
A sob left my lips. I hated this. All that work, for nothing. I let myself fall with him, pampered myself in his presence. Nights we’ve stayed up, walks we went on, runs we had together, work we’ve developed with each other with- none of it mattered.
But I wanted him. Still. I missed him.
I missed the way we slept together, and the way he made sure I ate because he was so protective over that, even if I had something small. He was happy I was trying, and I was happy to do it for him.
I remember when I attempted suicide and I had the nerve to think; Alpha Chris- who always claimed to be my mate, seemed to be a better mate than Derek.
How fucking wrong can I be? What was wrong with me?
I’m not sure how long I laid there. Days could’ve passed, and I’m sure they did. I slept for a few moments at most, but I would jerk awake, screaming and crying, I’d have an attack and then pass back out. I hated it.
There was a migraine constantly in my head because I missed him. Sage was clawing and whining for our other half.
Blood was dripping down my arms, the rope digging into my bandages and re-opening the cuts each time I jolted awake. The pain seemed unbearable, I was spoiled with Benlyam. I should never have allowed myself to heal, I shouldn’t have allowed him to coax me out of my shell. It was all falling back on me. Hunger was setting back in place. And I wanted to hold my abdomen, something instinctively pressing in me to do so.
My eyes were constantly leaking. The blood on my legs had dried. I heard the door scratch open and my head flipped to the side.
Chris walked him, holding his camera and a bag.
“Smile Viole-” he stopped talking and took a big whiff of the room. He looked confused as he came near me, then suddenly smirked. An evil smirk. “Ah! Benny boy, aw, I wish you could smell this,” he crawled on top of me, setting the bag on the side of the bed.
I frowned and sunk into the bed. I wish I could fall into it and never come back.
“Let’s see if it’s what I think it is,” he shoved his face in my neck and sniffed me. I whimpered and attempted to move but he just growled and smacked my face.