Elaine smiles. “What if you think you look like my sister? Carolina is my sister, so that I can stay with James for a long time. No matter what, he won’t abandon me. What about you? You are not my sister, even though you look much alike, you are not!”
My sister makes me feel so strange. Is she in love with James?
But it makes sense. James has been taking care of her all these years, and it’s not strange she would fall in love with James.
I don’t know what to do.
But now I can’t expose my identity. I can only go against her, “Whatever. If you think I am willing to be her substitute, I don’t mind. If not because of James’ identity, do you think I would promise him to come to see you? It’s funny. My time is precious.”
I don’t think James knows what Elaine is thinking, but I understand what she wants so easily. That’s what makes her so angry.
She looks at me fiercely and angrily. “You are shameless! You used James!”
“But James likes that, probably because he loves your sister so much that he takes me as her. Little girl, he won’t love you. You can only be the sister of the woman he loves. Even if he can take care of you all his life, he would only take you as a sister.” I look at her worriedly.
That’s true. James takes care of Elaine because he cares so much about Carolina. She knows what is called ‘Love me and love my dog’.
Perhaps it triggers her pain, and her face turns pale, “At least I could be with him for life! I’m not just his sister! Let’s wait and see!”
“Elaine!” I urgently shout at her. She immediately keeps quiet and looks at me, “Don’t call me like that! Only my sister can call me like that. Who do you think you are!”
“I get what you want and that’s why you’re angry, isn’t it?” I look at her with a sneer that makes her look bad.
“No one can take James away, except my own sister, who is dead. But in James’s heart she is alive all the time, and so is me. You will know it soon.” Elaine smiles at me. “I can be myself, but can you?”
I chuckle and says, “You want to be your sister’s substitute in James’s heart, but he doesn’t recognize you, am I right?”
She and I are against each other, looking each other in the eyes without flinching.
Elaine turns pale and looks away in embarrassment.
I love her from the bottom of my heart.
I do not know if she will suffer because of love. I hope that someone would love her heart and soul, rather than falls in love with someone who doesn’t love her at all.
Elaine is anxious, because what I said is what she thinks.
“Don’t be proud!” Elaine warns me.
I smile, not caring it, “I won’t be proud. I am just a substitute. Why should I be proud? I just want to get what I want quickly.”
I sigh and tell the truth. I want to put an end to everything and be myself again.
Elaine is shocked. Her eyes are soft. Maybe I am just like what I was before.
“No wonder James said you look like my sister, not just in your look, but your temperature.” Elaine says in a daze.
“If you like, you can take me as your sister’s substitute. I don’t mind. I can be your sister for a while.” I don’t want to hurt Elaine, and think of a compromise.
Elaine seems to be moved, like she’s thinking about what I’m saying.
“Elaine, I won’t always be with James. Our relationship will come to an end.” I smile, just like I did a long, long time ago.
Elaine watches me in amazement, her eyes are wet.
I feel hurt like being pricked by a needle. Sorry to make her feel sad.
“I know, you are not my sister, but you are really like her, and I really miss her.” Elaine bursts into tears, just like she did when she was a kid.
I go up and try to pat her on the back, gently say, “Take me as your sister, for the time being.”
Elaine doesn’t say a word and cries in my arms. I know I make her feel uneasy.
There’s no doubt that she misses her sister, but she feels that she is betraying her sister.
And she hates me for taking James away.
“I don’t know. Let me think about it.”
Elaine wipes her tears. “I still don’t like you.”
It is like I coaxed her when we were kids.
It’ll warm Elaine up a bit.
I’m sorry, that’s all I can do for now.
Elaine shows me around the campus.
“This is also my sister’s school. When she left, I just dropped out of school. My sister hoped that I could be admitted to a good university, so I studied hard to enter A university. I took the admission letter to her tomb. I wondered whether she was happy when hearing the news.” Elaine talks to herself as she missed the old days.
I listen to her behind, and feel painful.
“Do you know how I get through these years? My parents are dead, my brother is in the army, and I am alone. I thought the sky is falling apart. But James takes care of me. He says I am Carolina’s sister and that’s why he wouldn’t leave me alone.” Elaine smiles. “But he did it because of my sister. You’re right, he loves my sister, so he would take care of me.”
Elaine stops and looks at me. “James misses my sister. His health conditions are getting worse due to years of drinking. Actually, it’s not a bad thing that you are here. You can help him.”
I avoid her gaze and pretend to look at the crowd. “I’ll leave too.”
“Let’s talk about it then. Maybe he’ll be in love with me then.” Elaine laughs and blushes.
It may be because she misses me too much. Elaine suddenly relaxes her vigilance, and tries to be nice to me.
“Let’s have lunch together! The food in the canteen is very delicious. My sister said to me before, I do not believe her at first. But it’s really delicious, and it’s inexpensive. Ask James to have lunch with us.” Elaine smiles and treats me sincerely.
I look at her, and immediately remember the past, and she smiled at me like that in the previous days.
I also smile, suppress my feelings and say, “OK, let’s have a meal together. I have not eaten in A university.”
“You’ll like it.” Elaine says. She picks up the phone and calls James.
“James, come to the canteen. Let’s have lunch together. How long has it been since you ate with me?” she says to James, “Come on, Carl is also here.”
By the time James gets here, Elaine and I are already at the door of the canteen. Elaine takes me by the hand, as if we are sisters.
James looks stunned and says, “I thought you were going to fight at first.”
“Miss Carl is very good. I misunderstood her, and she really makes me feel that she is my sister. Thank you.” Elaine says, shaking my hand, her eyes smiling with delight.
She always acts like that when she’s happy.
James looks at me gratefully, taps us on the shoulders and says, “Come on, get in there, or it’ll be too crowded.”
It is so familiar to me that I feel like I have really come back.
There are subtle changes here, but the canteen is still the same by and large. The food in the small canteen is better than the big one, and even the aunt who sells rice has not left.
“Take a sit. I will take the food.” Elaine asks me to sit down and runs happily out of the room.
James and I sit across from each other in the dining room, and I move in discomfort.
“I haven’t eaten in the canteen for years.” I wipe the table with a paper towel.
James says. “I come here often.”
“With her?” I point to Elaine and say, “Love me, love my dog?”
James says nothing. He looks at me, and his expression becomes tender. “Are you jealous?” he asks.
He smiles, and his eyes are looking afar.
“No.” I glance at him, “I know our relationship.”
“That’s good.” James stares at me and smiles, his eyes creepy.
Elaine walks over with the food. She buys so much that she makes a few more trips.
“She hasn’t been this happy for a long time.” James looks at Elaine and says, “After her sister died, she suffered from depression and almost killed herself.”
I look at Elaine, my heart ache and I can’t say a word. I pinch hard myself under the table and say, “Really?”
“Yes. I was in bad spirits at that time, too. I went to the hospital. Elaine cut her wrist and she went to the hospital as well. t I’m so sorry. What would Carolina think if she finds out I don’t take care of her only sister?” James keeps his eyes on me.
“Do you think she’ll blame me?”
“No.” I shake my head. “You did your best.”
James smiles with relief, “Thank you. She’s so happy today because of you.”
“You’re welcome.” I watch Elaine as she walks toward us. I want her to have a good time. I want to do everything I can to make her happy.
“I don’t know what you like, but I order the most delicious food here.” Elaine takes almost every plate on the table, just like she did before.
I remember all these dishes, and they were also my favorites.
“Try this. I like it very much.” Elaine puts the bean braised noodles in front of me.
“Thank you.” I bury myself in the food.
It tastes as delicious as before, and my past memory seems to come flooding back.
The university life was my happiest time. My family was happy and brother and sister were good. I really miss those days.
“Is it delicious?” Elaine looks at me.
“Yes!” I smile.
I eat a few bites and find that there is coriander inside, and could not help frowning.
“What’s the matter? James spots it and asks.
“Oh, nothing.” I pick out the coriander and say, “There is coriander. I don’t like it.”
Elaine looks at me and says, “My sister doesn’t like cilantro either. I didn’t expect you two to have similar habits.”
Being shocked, I pretend to not care, “What a coincidence.”
“Bean braised noodles are my sister’s favorite food.” Elaine continues.
“Why are you and my sister so much alike? Are you imitating her on purpose?” She looks at me with bewilderment and says, “What is your purpose?”
There is a sinister look again in her eyes.
James looks back at me with a curious look.