It isn’t until the kiss is over that James looks at me and says, “You are too wordy.”
I am still stunned. James starts the car and drives me away. In the rear back mirror, I see Morley’s sad face. Would he see what happened just now?
I made it clear to him, but I don’t want to hurt him.
“Where are you taking me to?” I ask.
James says mysteriously, “You’ll see.”
I look at James’s profile, and feel sad. I don’t know what I am going to do.
I want to revenge, but… I shake my head trying to shrug off the ridiculous ideas quickly.
I learn that James is taking me to the place we first met. The bar.
It’s early in the evening and the bar hasn’t opened.
But James walks me in through the back door.
The staff who arrived early sees James and shouts in surprise, “Mr. James.”
I get nervous again.
James pulls me into a booth on the edge of the dance floor.
“Where are we? What did you bring me here for?” I sit down uneasily. The memory here is so engraved on my heart. I will never forget it.
To be in a place like this is like being tortured. The memories rush in my mind so I have to repress the feelings from being revived.
“Do you know where this is?” James says, his eyes are fixed on the front, “This is where I first met Carolina. She was timid. While clutching at me by the cloth, she pretended to be bold. She was so cute that I fell in love with her at first glance.”
He still remembers the past.
It hurts me when I listen to him, but I have to pretend to be a stranger and say, “It has nothing to do with me. You brought me here to miss your lover. It’s ridiculous.”
I sneer, but I also look at the front. I would never forget the place where I met him, nor did I forget the scene when he looked back at me. It was so sexy.
It’s been so many years, but it just like happened yesterday.
James pulls back his gaze and looks at me. “I appreciate you. No matter who you are, I appreciate you coming into my life again. Even if you’re not Carolina, it’s fine, because you both look the same. That’s enough.”
James is trying to completely turn me into a substitute for Carolina.
I smile coldly at James, “What good is it for me to be with you?”
It’s too difficult to be in a romantic relationship with him. It’s better to only be involved in benefits.
“I’ll give you anything you want.” James lifts my chin, his black eyes seducing me. “I will satisfy you.”
There is no one here, only the vague light and the ambiguous vibe. James and I look at each other anxiously.
Maybe I want to be with him, but I can’t do what I want, because I can’t love him anymore, and if I can’t love him, then we can only use each other. He wants me to be Carolina, and I want to revenge.
“You will know what I want in the future.” I say.
James’s eyes are so hot they seem to melt me. “Fine.” He says without the slightest hesitation.
It’s strange that I am so sad. Maybe James has finally found a substitute, then he can forget Carolina gradually. Why am I so melodramatic?
James puts his arms around me and I freeze.
“You have to get used to me. I will hug you, kiss you, and even get you laid. We’ll do intimate things a lot later on because we’re couple.” James’s voice echoes in my ears.
I am nervous, and it is this feeling that makes me addicted.
I’m still Carolina’s substitute. I’m my own substitute.
As night falls, the club gets crowded
“Let’s go and dance.” James takes me into the crowd.
I struggle to get rid of him. “I can’t dance!”
The deafening music and the flashing lights make it particularly unreal. The more unreal, the more seductive it is.
The light flickers on and off on James’s face. “I’ll teach you.”
He stands under the neon lights; the flickering lights make him sexier.
I look at him while my hands and feet are out of my control. I stretch out my hands.
James pulls me into his arms, his mouth close to my ear, and whispers, “It’s funny to dance hugging together.”
We get so close to each other, so close that I can hear his heart beating.
It is noisy here, and the rhythm of the music is ringing in my ears.
I am in such a panic that I want to run away.
“Don’t move! James’s hand holds my waist tightly, and the heat of his hand is like the hot iron.
“I…” I stutter and look up at him.
His profile shines in the shadow, his jawline is clear, and he is smiling.
I am lost in his stunning look.
That’s what he looked like when I met him years ago.
We stick to each other. My hands and feet are soft, and I begin to sweat.
James is poison to me, so I can’t stay close to him.
“You’ll have to look at me! James pulls me to him harder, and I can feel his strong chest.
I stare at him in amazement.
James is as overbearing as ever.
His hand slowly kneads on my waist, with fire in his eyes.
In the high music, no one notices us. We are just one of the ordinary guests, without any past, without any emotional entanglements, and without any hatred.
Maybe after one dance, everything would vanish into thin air.
I think so, enjoying myself in his arms at the moment, and want to possess him.
He and I quietly hug each other in the crowd, as if there are only us in the world.
When the song is over, I push James away and say, “Take me home. Ella is still at home.”
James doesn’t say anything. He gets up and takes me out of the dance floor. I look back, and the sweet scene has disappeared.
When we get out of the bar, James goes to get his car.
I stand at the door waiting for him.
Maybe it’s because things have been going so smooth lately, or maybe James just bewitch me, I think it not impossible for me to be with James.
But I want revenge. If I want revenge, James will be involved. No one can be spared.
The smile on my lips gradually cools down and I recognized the reality.
James flashes his lights. I walk over and James gets out and opens the door for me.
“I can do it myself.” I say.
James says, “As long as you are by my side, I will do anything for you.”
Would you take revenge on your own mother for me? No.
I say secretly in my heart.
The car gets to my house downstairs. When I am about to open the door and get out of the car, James grabs me.
I look at him puzzledly and say, “What?”
“Here.” James points to his mouth.
“Kiss me!” he orders.
I don’t move, just looking at him.
James has no choice but to give me a kiss on the cheek. “Will you die by kissing me?” he asks.
As I smile, I suddenly realize that I just like watching him getting angry but couldn’t do anything to me.
I go upstairs, thinking the nanny is at home looking after Ella, but when I open the door, Morley is here.
Morley is reading fairy tales to Ella.
“Mom! Ella runs to me and I hug her with a smile.
“You are back. As soon as I open the door, Ella and he looks at me.
Morley’ said in a cold tone, “Did he send you back?”
For a second, I don’t even know how to face Morley.
I know what Morley wants. I’m out with another man, and he’s at home taking care of my kids.
I’m sorry, or I feel like I owe him something.
“I’m sorry, but something happened today. Where’s Amy?” I ask, looking around and shouting, “Amy.”
“Something happened to Amy’s family, so I ask her to go home first.” Morley says.
His eyes are always on me, as if he has something to ask.
I know what he wants to ask.
“I’ll put Ella to bed first and talk to you later.” I say.
Morley says, “OK.”
He turns to look at the light outside the window and waits for me.
Ella falls asleep quickly. I get ready and go out.
I think Morley has guessed what I want to say.
“I said that I am going to tell you. I’m sorry.” I sit next to him.
Morley’s expression remains calm. “It doesn’t matter. I will always be your friend.”
“I am thinking how to tell you about it.” I sit down on the sofa and look for a comfortable position.
“Were you hiding from someone when you met me?” Morley asks, “Just start there.”
“Fine.” I smile.
“Well, I was indeed hiding from some people. They were sent by James’s mother. She has always disapproved of us being together, more in disgust than in disapproval.” I am surprised that when I recall it, I am not in pain at all.
“I met you, and I made an appointment to meet you again. But when we met again, I was in the South State, because something had happened to me.”
“James’s mother kidnapped my sister and held her hostage, so I had to leave and then I was forced to fly to the US. I don’t get on the plane during the transmission flight. But I didn’t expect that that plane would get crashed and everyone thought I was dead.” I sigh and continue, “I can only live incognito in the South State, until I met you.”
“I changed my identity, waited for five years, and I come back here to take revenge. My sister is still in the hands of James’s mother, and his mother has destroyed my family. James and I can never be together. I’m just using him now.” say I.
I tell him the whole story calmly, without any thoughts in my mind, not even hatred. Maybe it’s because I have been on the verge of successful revenge.
I’m proud.
“What about me? Morley suddenly grabs my hand. “You and James can’t be together. Then how about you and me?”
He looks at me with bright eyes.