By Amah’s Heart.
I stood watching Julie say “I do” to her long time boyfriend.
She was married and looks very happy. Julie was faithful to him for three years, she was selfless and kind.
She deserves everything good because Julie is a lady with a large heart.
I felt tears rolling down my face I quickly wipe it off.
I wasn’t crying because my bestie is married and I’m left behind.
I was crying because my whole life looks so messed up.
Thinking of the havoc I caused in the eyes of Mr Desmond makes me want to cry even more.
I did exactly what I was avoiding, the things I hated the most which was never to hurt him.
Dominic came out unexpectedly and swept me off my feet with his cuteness.
He worsen it by proposing to me. One thing I did right was not to jump at his proposal with open arms. If not I would have regretted it big time.
He called me a liar forgetting that he was the biggest liar for never telling me about his daughter and baby mama.
He wronged me and still broke up with me then used the following week to ask me to forgive him and accept him back.
His excuse was because he was angry with me for coming with Desmond to the fancy restaurant and getting all intimate with him which was the main reason he went home with Rexy and slept with her just to see if he can forget me.
He dumped me and later came back begging which gave me the opportunity to dump him right back.
I feel so stupid to have even fallen for him. My only consolation is that I didn’t allow him to sleep with me.
With the way I was feeling for him I could have given in if not for safe discipline.
“God… i hate Dominic… I hate myself even more…
I said mainly to myself.
“Hey Kat.. where have you been? Is time for pictures… come on… Julie is asking of you…
My younger brother who I went with came to call me from where I sat alone thinking about my life.
I went to Julie and there she was smiling to the camera with her husband and squared.
She conered me aside and whispered to my me as I stood by her side.
“Have you been crying Kat? Is it a tears of Joy for me or a cry of regrets for Desmond? If I don’t know you better I could have said that you are not happy for me but thank goodness I know you like my palm and I definitely knew you have started sucking again like a child. Get over it girl. You made a mistake… is not the end of the world. You have apologised and went over to see him but the security said he wasn’t around and even if he was he doesn’t want to see you. Is time to move on. Dominic was a bad choice in the first place. I could have stand with Mr Desmond any day any time over Dominic but I wanted you to make your choice and follow your heart. I never knew Dominic will turn out this way. Well, end of the long sad tale… maybe your future partner is none of the “D’s” it could be a “B” who knows hahahaha. Kat move on with your life… someday and I hope soon your whole efforts towards life will be crowned with joy. Be happy for me… let go of sadness and rejoice with me. Is my big day and being married or not will not change our friendship goals. Your heart is pure Kat and I’m very proud to be your friend. Your own big day is on the way… don’t loose hope… alright?
I nodded as emotions runs through me.
After the Julie’s big day, I and my brother went home.
I tried to resume my normal life but every now and then my mind keep traveling to Desmond.
“Where is he? What is he doing? Is he well, can he ever forgive me? Does he even thinks of me sometimes… maybe the good side of me. During his recovery process when we were like great friends talking and laughing at each others lame jokes before I started catching feelings even without him knowing. He used to be very difficult to handle not until he saw that I wasn’t ready to give up on him, I believed he was going to walk again and he did. I’m glad… so glad that he slowly believes in me even though he never wanted me to betray the wife’s orders but he was ready for a change… and I did everything possible to make sure I see him smile. Desmond slowly became so loving and caring towards me. I thought with the way he loves Erin that won’t be possible but he broke free and i became everything to him and I loved him dearly not until Dominic sweet looks swept me off my feet. I was initially worried about Erin’s name being mentioned most times by Desmond, my thoughts was that he still have feelings for her and my plans was to find a way to reunite them so that I can also be with Dominic. But I was all wrong Desmond was done with her and Erin wasn’t really a changed person like she claims. I destroyed my hardwork with stupid attitude. I wish I can make amend but is too late. Desmond hates me and sees me like Erin. He will never trust me again. That’s the only part that is Killing me… Mr Desmond.. Desmond…
“What is wrong with me? Why do I keep thinking about him. Why can’t I just focus on the bright side and also forget about him like he did. Oh no… why is my head filled with his thoughts. Julie is right… is time to move on. But how do I move when Desmond occupies the largest part of my life…