“So … how was it?” Hazel asked Jan when they were having ice cream at a creamery by the beach.
“How was what?” Jan licked through her chocolate mint ice cream.
“Your first time? Did you do it? You haven’t told me anything about it yet.”
Jan paused for a moment, “You sure you wanna know?”
“Well, you’re gonna tell me anyway … right? Come on, spill it out.”
Jan’s face glowed, she had been wanting to tell her about it for weeks. She hadn’t said anything because she knew Hazel was feeling left out when it comes to sex. She always complained about being the only teenager in the world who hasn’t had a boyfriend, let alone knew anything about sex.
“It was weird …” Jan started with a smirk, “But then it got better after a few times.”
“Oh my God … how many times have you done it?” Hazel scooped her double chocolate fudge with a brownie on the side.
Jan’s eyes rolled up, she was counting in her head, “Well … a lot,” she giggled, “I mean … you kinda have to do it many times to get used to it, you know what I mean?”
“No, Jan … I don’t know what you mean … go on …”
“Right, well … it kinda hurt the first time, so we didn’t go all the way because it was uncomfortable, but he’s not experienced either so we kinda try it out as we go along, it was silly actually,” she laughed.
Hazel nodded along while enjoying her ice cream and the nice sunny weather outside the creamery. The wind was blowing lightly, the sun was warm, it was her favorite kind of afternoon at the beach.
“But once we get to it … oh my … it’s like riding a bike, once you get a hold of it, you’ll just get better at it.”
It made Hazel laughed, “Oh my God … I’ve never heard that comparison before, like riding a bike? How is it like riding a bike? Did you paddle?” she joked.
Jan’s head was tilted back as she laughed out loud, “No … you know what I mean … oh …” she lowered her voice, “Kyle’s not circumcised.”
Hazel furrowed her brows, “What difference does it make?”
“Well, if a guy is not circumcised, there’s excess skin on the tip of his penis, but if he’s circumcised … it’s clean … you know? Like a bald head.”
They giggled and almost spit out their ice cream.
“And when you put it in your mouth,” Jan added.
“Eeeewwwww ….. you put it in your mouth??” Hazel screamed.
“Sssshhhh ….” Jan laughed.
“Eww … Jan!! Why did you put it in your mouth? You know he peed with that thing right?”
They were laughing so hard and made everyone looked their way.
“It’s called a blowjob you moron … it’s what you do when you have sex, and he puts my thing in his mouth too,” Jan explains in a whisper.
“Oh my,” Hazel shook her head and waved her hand, “Okay … stop … I don’t want to hear that part, it’s too much … how do you do that? Put that thing in your mouth?” she grimaced in disgust.
“It’s kind of like eating ice cream you know … or a Popsicle … you just …”
Hazel almost fell off the bench in laughter, “Okay you have officially ruined my ice cream eating from this point on … oh God … do we really have to do all that disgusting stuff when we have sex? It sounds so gross.”
Jan raised her brows, “Hmm … it sounds gross now … but wait until you see Theo’s or Lee’s uncircumcised or circumcised dick … you’ll get what I mean.”
Hazel covered her face with both hands and shrieked, “Oh whyyy did you have to put that image in my head? I hate you!”
Jan laughed at her naive best friend. Hazel was the sweetest girl she had ever known and it would be fun to know how she will handle her sex life in the future. But in the meantime, she was enjoying teasing her with her sex talk and watched her cringe with every detail she learned.
“Was it big?” she was curious.
“You know that it doesn’t get big until it’s aroused and erected into its full size, right? I don’t really have anything to compare it with, I mean … the ones I saw in porn were a lot bigger … but I guess all the boobs there are a lot bigger than the real ones too … it’s a funny feeling when it expanded, it started tiny and then it gets harder and bigger and longer … like an alien,” Jan tried to explain as best she could.
Hazel’s face was flushed in different shades of red listening to that description, she had never even saw porn before in her life. To think that a penis was comparable with an alien was hilarious. Her stomach was cramped at some point that afternoon for having too much of a laugh at Kyle’s penis. Poor guy.
Just like so many other teenage girls like her, she cringed, blushed, shivered at the thought of sex for the first time, but also very curious. She knew most of her friends have done it, but she wasn’t sure about it when it comes to herself. Not only because she didn’t have a boyfriend nor she ever had one, but sex was something still very far in her future.
She was the kind of sweet who still believes in saving up herself for someone who’s worthy of that physical connection, and not just experimenting with sex for the sake of their teenage raging hormones. She longed to have someone to call her own, there’s nothing else she wanted more than to have her first boyfriend, but it was more of the companionship rather than physical.
She realized most kids her age got it mixed up and confuse between the two, and they end up experimenting sexually and disregard the emotional connection that they really craved for.
“Hey … I thought I’d find you here? You didn’t reply to my messages … what are you girls doing here?” Lee came from out of nowhere and interrupted their girl talk.
“Hey … oh sorry, my phone is in my bag I didn’t hear your messages … we’re just hanging out, are you done with practice?” Hazel was glad to see him.
“Yeah, just now … I hope you don’t mind Mischa is joining us … she wanted to hang out, so I thought I take her here,” he said.
Jan and Hazel leaned to the side to find Mischa at the back.
“Oh no, of course not … Hi!” Hazel waved at her.
“Great, I’m famished … do you guys want to grab a hot dog?” Lee asked.
Hazel looked at Jan, it was another metaphor they had been using all afternoon. They burst out laughing.
“What’s so funny?” Lee was puzzled.
“Nothing … no, I’m good … I don’t want to grab a hot dog … maybe Jan would,” she teased her back. “I’m just gonna sit here with Mischa … come sit here, so you want some ice cream? Or Popsicle?”
They laughed again.
“I’m so sorry … we were discussing something funny earlier … I’m glad you guys are here so we can talk about something else … so are you ready for the competition?” Hazel asked Mischa who was sitting in front of her now.
She told them about the practice and how great it went. The competition is just around the corner, a week before the summer holiday. Hazel couldn’t help but admire how beautiful Mischa was like a Russian doll. She wondered if she will soon lose her other best friend to the adventure of a romantic relationship, and that she will be all alone again.
Mischa’s clear beauty was a good distraction from having an image of Kyle’s penis in Jan’s mouth, or the wonder of whether Lee or Theo was circumcised and how their penis would look like before or after they were erected. She shook off the notion and focused on Mischa.
Then she felt slow-burning despair inside her of the fear that the next time they sit and have a conversation, Lee was going to be by her side with their arms wrapped around each other or even their lips locked together.