Chapter 93

Book:Stanton Completely(Stanton #3) Published:2024-6-2

With a heavy heart Bridget and I follow Cameron down the hall to a common meeting room that the police have been using as a base to coordinate with our security guards and search teams. There are three policemen in the room along with Natasha’s mother, my parents, Cameron, Bridget and me.
The police all shake my hand. “Mr Stanton.” They nod.
My heart starts to race. This is the first time they have requested to speak to us together.
“What’s happening?” I ask impatiently.
The policemen exchange looks. “We have a few reports that have come back from the crime scene.”
“Any prints?” I blurt.
“No,” the tall one answers. “Not that we can find.”
I shake my head in disgust, of course not.
“The DNA we got from Natasha’s hairbrush and toothbrush confirm that it was her blood on the boat.”
I drop my head as Bridget and her mother gasp and embrace. “Oh no,” Bridget whispers.
“We can also confirm that she had Rohypnol in her system too and that she would not have been awake during the ordeal,” the officer says flatly, running on autopilot.
I start to hear my pulse in my ears.
The officers hesitate and exchange looks again.
Don’t say it. Don’t say it. Please don’t say it.
The policeman directs his conversation directly at me. “The coroner’s report has come back from the crime scene, Mr Stanton.”
I lift my chin as I prepare myself.
“The search has been changed from one for a missing person to a body retrieval.”
I stand still, unable to react.
“There were over three and a half litres of blood on the boat and it has been ruled that nobody could survive that amount of blood loss.”
I close my eyes as my world comes to an end.
“I’m sorry, Mr Stanton, but your fiancée has been ruled deceased.”
I grip the back of the chair to stop myself from falling. I start to sway as my soul is ripped from my body and distantly from somewhere in the room I hear the howling of our families.
Darkness. Is it something ingrained in your psyche or is it a consequence of circumstance? With every hour I am away from my angel I feel the demons taking just that little bit more of my soul, pulling me into a darker place.
Revenge.
I can almost taste the blood of the person who did this to Natasha. I’m going to kill them with my bare hands when I find out who it is. And every last person involved is going to suffer and die a slow painful death along with them.
I sit in the back of my car on our way to LA. It has been sixteen days since Natasha died. Up until now I haven’t been able to bear the thought of going home without her and if I had my choice I would never go back, but Bridget is distraught. She thinks I’m going to do something stupid and won’t leave my side. It’s killing me. I just need to be alone.
She is in the car behind us, a convoy. The united family unit. What a joke. My mother and father are hardly speaking, and I can’t even look at my mother. Cameron is not talking to Ben, Ben is blaming himself and hasn’t spoken to Bridget since it was discovered Tash was missing. Brock is here, but we haven’t spoken directly. I know he is blaming me. I blame me. Bridget and her mother are fussing around me protectively and I just want to be left the fuck alone. Adrian is trying to be strong for all of us but I know he can’t handle this either. He loved Tash too.
We are falling apart and the glue that kept me sane is no longer here.
Finally we pull into my driveway and I close my eyes as the car stops. I can’t go into the house without her. This is her house, and she is meant to be here.
I stay seated in the car as I try to pull myself together enough to get out.
Bridget gets slowly out of the car behind and comes up to the door and opens it. “Come on, Josh,” she whispers.
I sit still, unable to move.
She grabs my hand. “It’s ok. I’ll come with you,” she says quietly.
I rip my hand from hers. “No!” I scream. “You are not Natasha! You will not come with me!” I yell.
I jump out of the car enraged. “All of you go!” I shake my head as the tears start. “I don’t want you here. Any of you. Go.”
“Calm down,” Cameron whispers.
“Fuck off!” I yell. I turn to the security guards. “You’re all fired, you are totally fucked. Get away from me!” I scream.
Everyone stands around defiantly as if expecting this and I storm into the house alone, slamming the door behind me.
I look around at the huge clean space and my chest starts to contract. I feel like I can’t breathe. I run to the stairs and take them two at a time until I get to our bedroom.
Instantly a calmness comes over me and I sit quietly on the bed with my heart beating heavily in my chest. I can feel her presence here. For the first time in two weeks I can feel her with me and it’s strangely comforting. I look over to the side table and through bleary eyes I see her diary with her opened glasses sitting on top of it. I pick them up and hold them to my chest and, as if on autopilot, I open the diary and start to read.
Dear Diary
Today I bought my wedding dress. The dress I have wanted to wear for eight years.
I’m so excited, I’m so happy, I’m so in love.
Mum will be here soon and I can’t wait to see her and show her Willowvale. Joshua said we can build her a house there. I desperately hope she wants to live there with us. I can’t wait to see Josh’s face when I tell him I want to move to his dream house and live his dream life.
I love it there too.