What have I done? Why can’t I control my emotions? Only because of me Kiera left me, not only that the friendship with the bond that I created with her is also ruined because of this, all because of me and my fucking mouth. Fool. Why? I don’t think that now, after all this, I can stop Kiera. And because of my mistake, Aria has to lose her mom, too, only because of me.
“Kiera,” I called one more time, hoping that she would turn her back and come back, but all my hope ends when Kiera disappears outside the door.
I ran towards Kiera, wanting to stop her, but the phone ringing inside my pocket stopped my steps.
I wanted to ignore the call, but looking at the caller ID; I brought the call to my ear. “Hello,” I said, listening to the words very carefully. “We are coming,” the call ended.
How worse can a single day be? Kiera was so happy. I don’t even know how she would react to such news. First thing first, I need to stop her from leaving before it’s too late.
“Kiera, wait,” I said, running towards her, holding her arm, stopping her from moving any further.
Kiera turned to her, staring at me with anger, “Why is anything left for you to confess,” Kiera signed as her anger seemed to calm a bit. “Look Jason, you’re a good man and any girl will be happy to be with you, but that girl is not me…., so, let me go,”
“Kiera, let’s forget what I said minutes ago. Right now come with me,” I replied, pulling her hand while walking her with me.
“Where are you taking me?”
“Come with me,” I sighed. I don’t know how Kiera will react to hearing the news, but I can’t hide it from her. It’s now or never. “Kiera…., your father can’t be discharged today,”
“Why..?” I asked for a cut in between.
“Your dad, he is no longer in a coma,” I continued as we made our way inside the car.
“Jason, I know, you know just talk fast or I’m leaving,” Kiera said, trying to step out of the car.
“No.” I stopped her, holding her arm, “Kiera, your dad is in a vegetative stage now,”
“Vegi….. What?” Kiera asked, looking confused.
I started the engine. “The only thing I can say you now is that your father is good. We’ve got to see your father’s doctor for further information. I myself don’t know the details of how something like this can happen when he was doing fine for a week,” I continued as my eyes focused on the road. Kiera doesn’t break a single word all this time. I know how hurt she is after hearing the news. Today she was so happy with the news of her father coming home. But look at what happened at first; I ruined her day by not controlling my mouth and my emotions, and now the news of her dad being in the vegetative stage.
“Kiera, everything is going to be fine,” I asked as we were halfway to the hospital. I hadn’t made an attempt to start a conversation with her. I thought she needed peace of mind after learning her father’s condition was getting worse. But I guess I was wrong. Kiera seems to zone out. I don’t think I should interrupt her. Not now; at least. My only focus should be to reach the hospital and look thoroughly at Kiera’s father’s condition. How could something like this happen in the first place? He was fine this morning and how can he be at a vegetative stage now?
“Stop the car,” I turned my head to Kiera, anxious by her sudden words.
“Kiera, we are still very far from the hospital,” I spoke calmly, continuing, driving the car.
“Jason, stop the car,” Kiera said again, with her words dominating as her face held no emotions in it. “Stop the car or I’ll jump,” Kiera said again, as I ignored her words earlier.
I parked the car on the side, with my eyes focused on Kiera, “Now, tell me why.”
Kiera ignored my words, wanting to get out of the car, but I locked the door. “Why are they doing this?”
“Jason let me go,” she pleaded.
“Only when you answer my question,” I said, placing both my hands on her shoulder, making her look at me. “Kiera, why are doing these? Don’t you want to see your dad?”
“NO, I don’t want to see anyone. What is the point of seeing him…, it’s better if I don’t go. Maybe then things will turn out differently than last time,”
I have no idea what she is talking about, but as a person with a dark and depressing past, I know that Kiera’s doubts and fears are something related to her past.
“You don’t want to see your dad,” I asked, as Kiera nodded her head like a child. “Fine, then let’s go somewhere else than,” I don’t even know what I’m doing right now, but I hope that what helped me all this time fighting with my grief, my darkest, might help Kiera, too. Maybe then she might open up a bit talking about herself and her past, because one thing I know about Kiera, who always tries her best to light up everyone around her with her cheerful smile, is itself hiding beneath the deep darkness of sorrows and pain.