Claude
“Rachelle! No! Don’t take her!” I immediately peeled my eyes open as I got up when I realized I was in a tent right now. Panicking, I was about to stand up when I groaned in pain upon feeling the half of my face being throbbed in pain. “Damn it!” I cussed when I realized that half of my face was covered with bandages.
“Brother!”
I looked up and saw Cherish entering the tent. Her eyes were filled with tears as she rushed to me to hug me. “Cherish…” I called her softly as she sobbed. “I am alright now… But Rachelle… Rachelle is not here. She has been kidnapped…” I said through gritted teeth. Sniffing, Cherish looked at me. I wiped her tears, feeling sorry for my youngest sister that I made her worry. She even glanced at the bandage covering half of my face. I caressed her hair. “I am fine.”
“For me, you are not…” She sobbed. “Silver told me what happened earlier. It was my sister-in-law who saved you so you can get away from them.”
I closed my eye, feeling my wolf raging inside me. “She always acted on her own accord without consulting me…” I said through gritted teeth. “She is always a selfish woman… She always chose to hurt me…”
I felt betrayed after finding out that Rachelle was pregnant with our pup, Cloudy. She kept her pregnancy because she was so selfish she didn’t want to give up on leading the brigade!
If it weren’t for Cherish, I would have thought that Rachelle being pregnant was baseless humor but it came out to be true. I was so mad… I even got mad at Cherish for telling me so late already. She regretted it but then, she was feeling guilty that I didn’t get to know and that despite Rachelle’s pregnancy, Rachelle was joining in the attack which might harm her and our pup.
I didn’t think twice about coming here to Auritaurie. I left the palace as soon as I found that out.
I couldn’t believe it seeing at that fleeting moment in Rachelle’s wolf form of her stomach that was already growing. I even caught it seeing it when she was dressing up. I couldn’t contain my anger at her. She stole every first time I became a father by supporting her pregnancy.
And now this. She sacrificed herself and let herself be kidnapped by Magnius Lothim.
Rachelle… Goddamn it! You are so selfish! You are always being unfair to me! This was always you thinking only of yourself! You always end up hurting me!
“Brother…” I snapped back when Cherish spoke. “This time… She only thought of saving you. Our kingdom needs an Alpha King. You cannot end up dead.”
That made my blood boil. “I need my Luna Queen! I need Rachelle! I need her! I don’t care if I step down as the Alpha King! I only want her! I want to build a family with her! And you would dare to say our kingdom needs Alpha King only? This freaking kingdom needs a Luna Queen, too!” I exclaimed angrily.
Cherish bit her lower lip as she lowered her head. “I-I apologize, brother. It is so sensitive of me to say those things. I thought I am helping you to ease your feelings…”
I suddenly felt guilty about what my youngest sister said. I felt my heart sink as I hugged her which earned her a gasp. “I’m sorry… It was wrong of me to lash out at you, Cherish. I am just stressed because Rachelle is not here with me. And Cloudy…” I gasped when I remembered my son. “Where’s Cloudy?!” I separated from hugging Cherish.
I panicked and stood up. I was about to go out but Cherish halted me. “Didn’t you know that Rachelle entrusted my nephew to Commander Cornelius? Silver said that you have talked it with my older sister-in-law via mind link.” She creased her forehead. “Don’t you remember?”
I almost slapped myself and nodded. Cherish guided me to sit. “I have forgotten…” I sighed and reclined to my seat. “I am certain that Cornelius brought our son to safety. He is an elite commander after all. He wouldn’t dare to put our son in danger,” I said, talking to myself.
Also, I am at ease that Cornelius cared about his master’s wishes so I am sure that Cloudy was safe.
“I need to go back to the palace and be alert to tighten the security all over the town,” I said as I tried to stand up. I must also refrain that Rachelle had given birth to our son. People only knew that Rachelle’s pregnancy was not real after all.
“But, brother, you are not healed yet…”
I sighed and combed my hair in frustration. “I need to speak with the palace doctors to concoct some healing potion when I return. I need to go back so bad, Cherish. I need a few platoons to make sure that I could come back to the palace alive and well. I cannot let Rachelle’s sacrifice go in vain…”
Cherish looked like she wanted to stop me but she sighed and nodded. “I shall speak with Commander Howard for his permission.”
“Just order him like the royalty, Cherish. No need to ask for his permission.” I hissed. “You have the bloodline of lycan like other werewolves.” I massaged my temple.
Cherish rolled her eyes. “I am not using my position as the princess to order them, brother. Stay right there.” Then she left me alone.
I sighed nervously as I jumped into my seat when I felt something wetting my trousers. “Huh…” I touched my cheeks and felt that… I was shedding tears? Then, I felt my heart was about to explode.
Now that I am alone… I realized now that I was in pain… mentally and emotionally. My wolf was urging me already to find Rachelle. I clenched my hands, understanding his sentiments. But I couldn’t help myself getting mad at Rachelle’s action for sacrificing herself just so I could escape.
I had plans to escape from them yet I let myself believe Rachelle that she would do something that would be helpful. I thought that there was something wrong with her and she just wanted to switch positions with me in attacking Lothim but I was wrong.
She managed to conspire with my royal knights to fool me. Silver told me that Rachelle did this to protect me…
“She really is a selfish one…” I just let the tears fall. I just couldn’t stop them. I had been wanting to get Cloudy right now but I wasn’t in the right stable to protect my son yet.
I need to save Rachelle first.
“What did I do wrong, Rachelle? Why are you always choosing to decide? I thought we already had an understanding…” I murmured as I combed my hair, frustrated at Rachelle’s action.
While contemplating, I realized now that I was in Rachelle’s tent where she was staying as the leader of the brigade. Then I came to see the small compartment that was on her desk.
When I opened it, my heart sank as I saw the letters I wrote for Rachelle. My breath was shaky upon reading the cheesy letters for her. I was constantly writing her a letter without a fail. I missed her so much. Those three months that I hadn’t seen her made me feel like it had been a hundred years since we hadn’t touched each other.
I couldn’t help the smile and tears smearing on my face.
Then my eyes landed on the journal that was kept behind the small compartment. I creased my forehead, wondering why Rachelle did not bring this back to the carriage when we departed.
I was skimming through it, not wanting to read because this was Rachelle’s private journals. The royal couples would only read this as soon as Cloudy reached his coming-of-age. Cloudy’s coming-of-age was also his coronation to be the next Alpha King.
That was the tradition that had been passed down from our family.
I had no reason to read it to respect our tradition however, something was urging me to read it. I decided to read a few pages.
***
It has been a month since I haven’t seen Claude. I have been yearning for him. I just recently found out that I am pregnant with his pup.
It was so careless of me that I hadn’t been careful. I knew that I was forgetting something. I realized that I did not take my fertility control as soon as I marched away from the palace.
I’m sorry, Claude. I have no intention to tell you this news.
I’m sorry…
***
I gritted my teeth in annoyance upon reading it. I checked the date. It was two months ago. Damn it! I shook my head and skimmed through the pages until I halted it in the recent pages.
I creased my forehead as my heart leaped out of my ribcage when I got to see my name was being mentioned. I immediately read it as my heart skipped a beat.
***
I lost my power as the Luna Queen of the Waevalon Kingdom. I would be soon detained at the north side to settle at the castle for a month as a sanction to put Claude and I’s son in danger.
It was so selfish of me to keep my pregnancy just because I wanted to lead the brigade.
Claude, I know you can never trust me again. I am sorry. I know it is hard to earn the trust I broke, however, I hope in time you will forgive me. Even though I am already losing the chance that we wouldn’t be able to return from what we had before, I am still determined to fix our relationship. I hope… we can still fix it somehow…
For Cloudy… My son… My handsome prince… You must bear the Auritaurie in your name. Mommy is so proud to lead this war.
If ever comes a time that I wouldn’t be able to last here in this world, I just want you to know that I love you so much, Cloudy. And so you are, my beloved Alpha King.
I will always love you even though we cannot be able to find each other again.
I am willing to bear the responsibility I have caused. If ever that your father finds out about what I did and the execution of me is the right answer, then I shall be able to receive it.
Even though I never wanted to be a Luna Queen, Claude… Claude, remember that I am truly relieved that I became your wife, your mate, and the mother of our son.
I silently thanked the Moon Goddess that I was your betrothed. I couldn’t imagine myself seeing you getting married to another woman that wasn’t even me.
This shall be the end of my writing this journal. I am no longer the Luna Queen of the Waevalon Kingdom so there is no reason for me to bring this with me.
May the Moon Goddess grant us peace after this war.
Long live, Waevalon Kingdom!
Signing off,
Rachelle Simon-Alexander
P. S.
To the one who is reading this, please tell Claude that I love him so much I am ready to sacrifice my life for him. I will protect him and our son at all costs.
***
As soon as I was done reading it, tears wouldn’t stop falling from my eyes. I didn’t mind if the bandage was even wet. I couldn’t help getting annoyed at Rachelle at the same time, I was also an idiot for not realizing the way she expressed her love for me.
She was ready to sacrifice everything. She even sacrificed her pregnancy for selfish reasons.
And she was ready to sacrifice her life just for me.
Just so she could protect me and our son.
And she already did it… She made it come true.
“Rachelle… You are really selfish…” I started crying as I hugged her journal.