“Why are you being so stupid, you think my words are just empty words, I mean everything I say here, stop trying to sound stupid and make me look like the bad guy, is it a crime to claim you.’ I yelled, this was getting on my nerves.
He seemed stressed and frustrated, they were black spots under his eyes. Why didn’t I notice it earlier, was he sleeping properly?
“I should be asking you the same question, Oceana, get your head straight, think about this family and the pack, don’t step on me and as for me making you look like the bad guy, I don’t think so. Think about the consequences you are getting into.”
“What will you do if I don’t do so, Gérard, I loved you with all my heart. Why are you doing this to me, I don’t give a fuck about anyone.” I couldn’t help it, my heart was about to burst, why wouldn’t he just understand me?
“Are you scared, just admit it?” I demanded with a glare.
“If I were so scared like you think, I wouldn’t be speaking or letting the both of us have this conversation.’
“Then, why are you not accepting me, why are you pushing me away from you, like I’m a crybaby whining for attention.’
“Because you are not serious, this is our family we are talking about, the clan is going to have our head if we go along with this mate thing you are speaking about.”
“This is what you say to me, after all these years, how could you, Gerard. Mating with my brother is not a crime, the moon goddess arranged us this way, we didn’t ask for it, why would the realm be against it.’ I reasoned and he just sighed and looked at me once more.
That was the question, why would the realm be against it, what are their reasons for their brutal action towards this type of mates like us.
“This life we are in, Oceana, it’s not the same, though we might be destined for some certain stuff, doesn’t mean we are meant to do it. Listen to me, I’m doing what is best for you, it doesn’t matter if we don’t ask for it or not, no one cares, all I’m saying is for us to follow the right path and don’t dwell on this bond that is connecting us both. To the realm’s reputation, to the society, we are an eyesore, we are not normal, we would be an outcast for the rest of our lives, because it is unacceptable, don’t you get it? What happens if we have kids, are you going to make them suffer because we are fated to be together? What future or lessons will you be teaching those kids? Do you ever think for the rest of their life is going to be miserable. Oh, come on, you and I both know we are not fit for this.’
“I don’t need you to do what’s best for me, you don’t get to choose what is good for me. I am old enough to know what’s best for me, you don’t get to decide on what my life is going to be, I determine it and I want you as my Alpha, whatever we do, you know we can’t defy the moon goddess’s instructions and stop being such a scaredy cat and hiding from reality, talking about non-existent kids.”
“What did you just say, are you even listening to me?” His eyes widened.
“You heard me.’ I yelled and folded my hands across my chest and then, put them down. “I’m not going to hide it.’
“Then be ready to die.’ He blurted out solemnly.
My heart skipped a beat.
“You’ve lived in the palace, in the mansion, the clans, you still don’t know the rules and you are trying to hide to act like everything is going to be fine if we just come out together and announce it to the whole world that we are mates. The moon goddess matched us together, you can’t touch us and we love each other, isn’t it?’ He mocked. “Is that your fucking plan, Oceana. You should know this, you are not Cinderella who got a happy ending in a movie, this is also not a novel, in which the lead characters always fought their enemies because of love and got a happy ending. Wake up to reality and think of what we are sticking our asses into if you want us to come out, is that you want us to do, you must be joking. I’m trying to save your life, you are trying to get killed, how pathetic.’ He taunted again with a chuckle.
This wasn’t the Gerard I knew, where did the sweet, caring, loving Gerard go to, where did the Alpha who is always by my side, consoling me, motivating me to always do the right thing, where was he? He sounded cold like he didn’t want this relationship between us, even if we are mates, he wants me to reject him but why couldn’t I do that? Why can’t I just end this once and for all, he doesn’t believe in us, he wants his life not ours.
It broke me.
I thought he would be so happy.
I thought with just a few words, I would be able to convince him to bond with me.
I thought with just a few words, he would be mine and we would hold hands and fight whoever comes our way, was I in my fantasy and not the real world, like he is saying I am? I know this is not some movie, but real life as it seems. I just intended to put up the courage and fight for what is mine.
What happened to Gerard and why am I seeing the opposite of him? What happened to “Be Together Forever” was it all lies?
“Gerard.’ I whispered, clenching my fist.
He continued. “I thought you were going to be disgusted with me, that’s why I told you, I didn’t expect you to act on your feelings and not think about where you stand.”
“Because I don’t care, you are the one I love.”
“Stop saying those words, the walls have ears, you are not a child, stop saying “I love you” put your fucking head together.”
“I can’t let you go, stop acting like you are someone else, you are Gerard.” My eyes were beaming with tears. “The pain I felt earlier, do you think, do you think I can…”
“What the fuck is wrong with you, don’t you ever understand what I say to you.” He said and began walking away from me. “Geez.’ He murmured.
“I’m not backing down without a fight, Gérard, I love you and that’s all that matters.” I quickly stated.