Jane
“Brandon went into a coma.”
I do not know if what I hear is the truth or an error of my ear or my mind, but these words have made my mind dizzy and knees like noodles…, “Hold yourself,” NO, words matter at a time like I don’t even know how to describe the pain that I’m feeling right at the moment. I don’t even know how to define my current agony in words.
I don’t know if words are enough to describe the inhuman and ruthless tumor and the suffering I am experiencing right now.
“Please try to control yourself,” Daniel said, placing both hands on either side of my shoulder to prevent me from falling to the ground. “Here, have a seat,” He helped me, guiding me to sit on a metal chair that I was sitting on before.
All my emotion that was lying somewhere in my heart was coming through my eyes. How cruel life can be for me and my nearest and dearest. Why does this happen to me every time? Why the person who I love the most has the worst possible ending, anyone can’t ever think or dream of, first Jared and now Brandon, and somehow or sometimes it feels like God is giving me the idea that love or happiness is something that I didn’t deserve in my life.
But wait, Brandon is in a coma and not dead and he can wake up and be healthy. If we tried hard if I tried hard and helped him to be treated with love and care. Then maybe one day he will be alright and live his life and be the old Brandon who was a Doctor, a father, and a good friend who was loved and respected by all.
I brushed the tears from my eyes and looked towards Daniel, who was reassuring me.
I popped the question to him that was running through my mind. “Are there any chances of Brandon waking up from his coma?”
“Yes, there are, but Jane, the chances are very low and no one knows how long it takes a day or week, maybe months, or several years, that no one knows.”
“But there is hope that he wakes up one day,” I said, hoping for a single ray of light in this darkest moment of my miserable life.
And upon hearing my words, the doctor nodded his head. “People can beat death with the love and support of their loved ones. Brandon is blessed to have such a loving wife in his life. I can’t say much about it as a doctor. But as his friend, I hope your love can help Brandon wake up from a coma.”
“Thank you,” I mumbled, nodding at my words.
“Take care,” Daniel left upon hearing a nurse calling his name.
Now alone and determined in the hope of making Brandon well, it is perhaps the only goal of my life, no matter how long this takes.
I know Brandon will heal, and it’s just that it will take time, patience, and care for your loved ones.
*********
Weeks had passed since then and there had been no hope of Brandon coming out of the coma. I don’t know what to do or expect at this point. With every passing day, my hope seems to shatter badly.
Every day seems the same. I go to the hospital sitting beside Brandon, holding his hands in mine, in the hope of sensing some moments in his body, but every day there doesn’t seem to be any change in his condition. But I try my best to fight to not lose hope.
Hope that everything will be alright. That, for once again, Brandon will be with his kids and with me. He will be normal. And I will keep fighting until the very end, for everyone that’s precious in my life.
I remember my conversation with Mrs. Samuel early today.
Mrs. Samuel called me, holding a beautiful bouquet of sunflowers in his hands. “Jane, I have made a bouquet for Brandon from my garden flowers. Why don’t you take them? Brandon will be happy seeing them.”
“Thank you,” I smiled, taking the bouquet from her, trying my best to hide my sadness. Brandon is so lucky to be surrounded by so many people that sincerely care for him. I just hope he wakes up to see how much he is loved by people in our lives.
I was about to leave when she grabbed my hand, “Are you Okay? You look sad Jane.”
Is my face so easy to read or Mrs. Samuel is psychic? I smiled again, trying to hide my emotions and change the subject. “Everything is fine.”
She smiled hearing my words, “Well, you’re not very good at lying or hiding your emotions.” She put a hand on my shoulder. “Don’t lose hope,”
She is right, “I don’t know. Sometimes I feel like I don’t know what to do…”
“We can all see, but we are all helpless.”
I sighed. I know she is right.
“You know, I was eighteen when I lost the love of my life in war. That day was the worst day of my life. I was hurt and thought life couldn’t be worse than that, but as time passed, the pain turned into happy memories and life started beautifully. That was when I found Dan. He differed totally from the type I ever dreamed of falling in love with, but as time passed and I found out more and more, I started to like him. We dated and fell in love. A few years passed, and we had our first child, but after a few months after his birth, he died. We were both saddened by the tragic incident, but again, as time passed, things started getting better. We were pregnant again and this time we gave birth to twins. So, Jane, you are not the only one who lost someone so dear to your life.”
I could see the sadness in her eyes as she spoke about her past, but there was also a sweet smile wherever she spoke about the good in life.
“I have seen you and Jared and how happy you were. Even though your parents were lovely people, you can’t let your past decide your future. You love Brandon. We can all see that, and even Brandon loves you, but you are scared of your past. You’re scared of losing one more person in your life,”
I could never have guessed that such a happy and cheerful person like her would have seen so much pain and death in her life. But even after all this, she is happy. On the other hand, I hold a grudge against my past, allowing it to destroy my future.
I couldn’t help but ask one thing that was roaming in my mind during our conversation. “How did you stay strong after all this happened in your life?”
“Honestly, I didn’t… I was just like you, but I allowed myself to look forward rather than look back and I had help, and after meeting Dan there wasn’t any way in life that I was alone. He always supported me and I supported him.”
Her words reminded me of Brandon, who was always there for me whenever I needed him, but I always second-guessed him. I always thought that his support and help were nothing but sympathy for me. But all these years, he secretly loved me and cared for me. He was always my shoulder when I cried; his arms always comforted me wherever I was sad. And his smile always used to bring back the smile on his face. All these years I ignored him and, in her hand, he secretly loved me, asking for nothing in return.
“Take this,” Mrs. Samuel put the bouquet in my hand. “Not all things are in our hands, but the least we can do is hope, and pray for the best.”
I nodded, hugging her tightly in my arms. “Thank you,”