(Noah’s POV)
Releasing a frustrated sigh, I shut the door with a slam. What a fucking ass. Oh how I bet he loves seeing his two sons turn on each other, the little shit stirrer. Saying what my wife can and can’t do. It’s just some sick and twisted form of entertainment for the old man. The day he dies will be one of the happiest days of my life.
Searching the room I became more agitated as she wasn’t here, “Embry” I gruffly called out, placing the plate of pizza on the table. Stupid fucking uncomfortable clothes, I glowered, throwing my shoes and jacket off of me. “In the bath” her gentle voice wafted out, my face immediately lifting into a smile.
Even just hearing her voice made me feel better. “I missed you beautiful” I leaned over, kissing the top of her head, the smell of her shampoo hitting me like a drug. How intoxicating. Taking a seat on the closed toilet lid, I sat admiring my beautiful beautiful baby. “Is everything okay?” Her voice came out in a whisper, I knew why, she was scared to set me off.
There was no need for her to fear me, I would never snap at her without cause. “Just my dad” I sighed, running my hands through my hair in exasperation. “I’m sorry your dads not nice” she frowned gently, letting her head drop onto her knees, her head turned to look at me.
“Every person deserves to have a good relationship with their parents, but some people just aren’t meant to be parents, you know?” I reached over to brush her wet hair back as a pained look took over her face. This is why I had to lock her away from the world, she was too precious, the way she comforts me after everything I’ve done to her. She’s much too pure for this world. “After I left, did they ever get better, your parents?” I take on a soft tone, not wanting to upset her with the sudden question.
“Not really no” she shook her head, hiding her hands in her arms. “I guess it kind of just hurt a little more because when you were gone, I didn’t have anybody else except them and when they would just always work or-” her voice cracked as she looked up at me with teary eyes. “When I would be right beside them and yet, they may have as well not been there at all, and I don’t want to stay bitter towards them because they are my parents and I know they loved me so much and they probably miss me like hell, but maybe if they had been there for me-” she drifted off into an uneasy silence.
“You wouldn’t be here” my jaw hardened, her guilty face turning away from me as I grabbed a towel from the rack, kissing my teeth. “Come on, I brought pizza” I nodded my head towards the bedroom as she unplugged the bath and let me wrap the towel around her.
“I don’t mean to keep upsetting you,” she shuffled towards the wardrobe, grabbing another one of my shirts. I did love when she wore them, especially the way they were too big on her and gave me the perfect view of my ownership branded right into her chest. “What kind of husband would I be if I didn’t accept you for your flaws?” I lowered myself onto the chair, patting my lap.
Letting out a sigh of content as she took her designated spot on my lap, my little pet. I grinned at the thought. The cogs in my head turning as she nibbled unawarely at her pizza, let’s see just how much I can break you my little flower. Let’s see how quickly those petals wither. Let me crush your roots and plant you again, growing under my light and my light only.
“Just because no one else would be able to love you with all the horrible things you’ve done Embry-” I took an ever so slight pause letting the words hit her, as she quickly turned her eyes wide as they gawked at the sincere expression on my face. “Doesn’t mean I will stop loving you, you’ll always have me baby, even when everybody leaves you, just like Indigo and Dakota” I gently kissed her shoulder.
“Y-you think I’m unlovable because of my flaws” she whimpered, her hand reflexively fisting at my t-shirt. “Not to me little bug, no normal person would ever find you desirable after everything you’ve been through, you’re weak, but that’s okay because I love how weak you are, I love you for every part of you, even the bad parts” I brushed my thumb against her cheek.
A shiver of satisfaction ran down my spine at the way I could physically feel her body recoil due to my words. Her lip wobbled as she fought back her tears, stop fighting it Embry, I can comfort you. I can take your pain away.
“B-but you always used to say you were the luckiest guy in the world because you had me” her brows furrowed in confusion. I had her wrapped around my finger now. “That’s because you were made for me Embry, because I could look past all your flaws unlike everybody else and I got to see the real you” I smiled, my eyes gleaming with victory as I watched her walls crumble.
It was painfully simple to crush her little petals between my fingers, turning them to dust. She was no better than a child.
I tilted my head in puzzlement as I watched her eyes rid themselves of that teary look, a hard look settling on her face. “Stop, don’t-don’t do that” she muttered, relaxing her muscles as she shook her head like a mother scolding a child.
“Do what, baby?” I rested my hands on her thighs, tracing patterns on her skin as I feigned innocence. “Manipulation, Noah, my therapist told me about it and-and I don’t like when you do it so stop” her eyes narrowed in a weak sort of hatred. And for a change, I couldn’t help the smirk that lifted on my face at her sudden defiance, at her sudden strength. I guess I underestimated my little flower, oh how fun things would be now.
This was why I adored her so much, she truly was one of a kind.
(Embry’s POV)
He was going to have to try a lot harder than that, despite that he did almost have me for a minute there. Returning to my pizza, I leaned against his chest, “would you like some?” I quietly asked, holding a slice towards him. He never ate with me anymore, I know it shouldn’t have bothered me but it did. “No thanks baby” he wrapped one of my curls around his finger, finding enjoyment in playing with my hair.
“Oh” I frowned, the dejected feeling piercing at my flesh. He was trying so hard to suck me in with his manipulation but the thing he always seemed to forget was that when it came to me, it was the simple things that festered into madness within my mind. Things like this. “Why don’t you eat with me anymore?” My voice dipping in volume as I tried to withhold my tears.
He was right about one thing, I was weak. Shifting me within his lap, I turned to face him, my legs dropping on either side of his hips, “hey, hey, it’s okay” he kissed my forehead, rubbing my back calmingly. “I just don’t want my mom to eat alone, I’ll still always sit with you while you eat” he smiled warmly, “you know she was asking about you, she misses you.”
I could feel myself choking on my tears, “why do you-do you do that, you went on this whole rant trying to turn me against the world and upset me and now I’m upset and you’re cheering me up, I don’t understand” the harsh sobs escaping me came from the depths of my soul as they wretched their way from me. I closed my eyes with sorrow as I let myself catch a glimpse of his distressed face.
“Because, because-” he was at a loss for words, “because I genuinely care about you Embry, and I’m so fucking scared that one day you’re just going to stop pitying me and walk out of my life so I panic and I hurt you, and I wish more than anything that you weren’t stuck with a person who feels the need to hurt you so that they can love you.”
The heavy feeling seemed to drag me down, my tears obscuring my vision of him. I liked when he allowed himself to be vulnerable with me, but at the same time I hated it, because it reset any anger I had built up against him. It crushed any chance I had of putting my love for him to an end.
Wiping my face with the sleeve of my shirt, I smiled weakly up at him. “But, we can work on it, we can make it get better, just because you are a product of your environment doesn’t mean you have to be,” his grip on my hips got tighter as he seemed lost within the confines of his own mind.
Bringing my hand to his face, it was my turn to brush my thumb against his cheek. “We can make this right” I breathed out, I watched him fight with himself before gently pulling my hand from his face. His head shaking no with a heartbroken look about him, “no Embry, no we can’t, I know you talk about me fixing you and making you better and I think about it too just not in the same way” his head turns from me.
“But we both know the truth, the only reason you were ever with me was because you believed you could fix me, and the only reason you’re still here is because you hold on to that, but I can’t let you fix me, because once you fix me, you won’t want me anymore.”
His eyes met mine, “and I can’t lose you Embry, I can’t.”
I sat back in shock at his words, my lips parted in realisation.
“The only reason you were ever with me was because you believed you could fix me, and the only reason you’re still here is because you hold on to that,”
My heart sunk in my chest as one thought drifted around my mind,
‘He wasn’t lying.’
Even though I despised when he said it, he really did know me better than I knew myself.
And that was dangerous.