It wasn’t until the cops had left that it occurred to me that once they did, there’d be nothing to prevent the intruders from having another go at it. And this time they weren’t likely to be so subtle. I threw on some shorts and ran after the big guys and caught them just as they were starting the car. I explained the situation and they agreed to come back in for a few minutes while I made other arrangements. I learned that Big was really Mike and Very Big was Stan, short for Stanislaus. They moved the car to my driveway and came inside with me.
They were both clearly disappointed that the girls had thrown on some clothes. The girls saw that and giggled, and once I explained that Mike and Stan were hanging around to protect us for a while, they looked at each other and giggled again and shimmied out of their minimal clothing. They each went to an officer and hugged him for a few seconds and kissed him on the cheek, then switched places and hugged and kissed the other. When Mary Beth hugged Stan his arms moved and I could tell that he wanted to grab her ass, but he stopped himself and looked at me.
“Go ahead,” I said. “I won’t tell your wife.” He reached down and gently grabbed Mary Beth’s ass and pulled her slightly into him and sighed.
“Better not,” he said. “She’s two hundred pounds and mean as hell sometimes. She’d kick my ass and then come over here and kick yours.” He let go of Mary Beth and she kissed him on the cheek again and then both girls turned and slowly walked out of the room, exaggerating the sway of their asses as they went.
“Now you can tell everybody that you’ve had a piece of lesbian ass, Stan,” I said.
His mouth gaped. “No shit?” he said. “I thought she was your girlfriend.”
“Well, she makes an exception in my case,” I said. “But aside from me, she’s into women. That’s where Dawn comes in.”
“Goddamn lucky-assed little fuckin’ punk detective,” Mike said. But he was grinning when he said it.
I called Pacific Division and explained the situation and asked the watch commander if he could have a squad car brought over and parked in my driveway. He agreed, and fifteen minutes later the unit arrived. Now it would at least appear that we had cops in the house. The driver was a fresh-faced kid straight out of the academy, stuck with office duty until he was partnered up for a beat. I thought his eyes were going to pop out of his head when the girls dutifully hugged him and kissed him for his help, too. This time they double teamed him. When they stepped back the kid was sporting an obvious tent. The girls giggled, something they were doing a lot of now, and Mike and Stan laughed and pulled the kid towards the door.
“Thanks again guys,” I said.
“Bullshit, thank YOU!” Stan said over his shoulder and laughed again. Meanwhile Mike was riding the kid. “Don’t worry about it, son. I remember my first naked girl, too. You’ll start to get used to it once you actually have sex.”
“Hey, they weren’t my first…” I heard before the door shut behind them. I turned on my girls.
“You’ve been very naughty,” I said. “You may have to be punished.”
“Yes please!” they both said.
“Have you learned anything at all today?”
“I’ve learned that I’m an exhibitionist,” Dawn said.
“Yeah,” said Mary Beth. “I’ve learned that I’m an exhibitionist, too. AND, I’ve learned that I love cock!”
It was still pretty early in the morning but all three of us were wide awake. Mary Beth and Dawn went upstairs to shower together while I rustled up some breakfast. I fried some bacon until it was crisp and chopped it up into small chunks, then I sliced up some green onions and diced some fresh basil from the patio. I cracked a bunch of eggs into a large bowl and whisked them until they were frothy, then shredded cheddar and parmesan cheese into the eggs until it was enough, then mixed in the other ingredients along with salt, pepper, cumin, and a dash of Tabasco. I stirred the mixture and poured it into a frying pan, covered it, and turned the flame on low.
I realized that the water for the shower had been running all this time and smiled at the thought of what must be going on in there. I briefly thought of investigating but decided to give the girls some alone time. After all, this was their first chance to be together without me. I poured myself a fresh cup of coffee and went out onto the patio and sat down to think about things while I watched the sun come up.
The first thing I thought about was Dawn. We were clearly in love with each other and the sex between us was incredible, but she was my niece. How far could we expect to go with this kind of relationship? Not to mention the fact that I’m 32 and she’s only 18. Maybe that didn’t matter so much to her right now, but it might matter a lot more when she’s 36 and I’m 50.
And because we’d had to call the police and at least two of them suspected that I was sleeping with Dawn (and one of them might find out for sure tonight), word might spread within the department and it might mean my job.
The next thing I thought about was Mary Beth. She was my best friend and I loved her, and although I had admired her good looks and hot little body ever since I’d moved in next door to her I’d never thought of making any kind of move on her because of her sexual orientation. That had all changed in the heat of the moment last night and now I knew that she was also oriented towards me. But she admitted that she would always also want female sex partners. Would that work for me? I didn’t think I was particularly jealous, but then again my relationships had always been monogamous. Not to mention one at a time.
This was making my head hurt. I took my coffee into the kitchen and poured a healthy dose of Kahlua into it. The shower was off. I committed the cardinal sin of checking on my breakfast, then put the lid back on and went back out to the patio to sit and think some more.
Could Dawn, Mary Beth, and I live as a triad? Dawn obviously enjoyed lesbian sex and that worked out well for Mary Beth, who also enjoyed straight sex with me. A threesome relationship that centered around Mary Beth might be a plausible rationale to the outside world for Dawn living with me: just a guy and his girlfriend who decide to let his niece live with them.
Then I remembered that the girls had invited Jen over for dinner and quite possibly ‘dessert.’ And had invited her to ‘take a run at me.’ Not only that, they had quickly and wordlessly agreed to it and done it without asking me first. I’d have to question them about that.
“Heavens, Lover, there’s a naked man on our patio!” Dawn said. I turned to look at them. Dawn was dressed in a towel and a smile; Mary Beth was dressed the same way only minus the towel.
“And he’s drinking our coffee,” Mary Beth said. “I’d better make more.”
“God, I’m ravenous and it smells delicious,” Dawn said. “What is it?”
“Frittata,” I said. “It should be ready soon.” I sat the coffee down and got up and walked to her and hugged her. She kissed me on the cheek and pushed me away, wrinkling her nose.
“Eeewww, Jen was right: you smell like stale sex. Go take a shower. We’ll finish getting breakfast ready.”
Ten minutes later I was back downstairs, showered and shaved and just as naked as Mary Beth. I hugged her and kissed her and fondled her ass a little.
“Soup’s on,” said Dawn, and we sat down to our frittata and champagne. As it turned out, all three of us were ravenous and I thought there was a danger that I’d have to make more breakfast.
“This is friggin’ delicious, Johnny,” Dawn said around a mouthful of frittata.
“Don’t talk with your mouth full, Dear,” said Mary Beth, her own mouth full. They both laughed and clinked their champagne glasses.
While we ate I explained my thought processes from my patio session of introspection.
“A three-way marriage?” Mary Beth said. “Well, not marriage, but you know what I mean.”