Evelyn
I stepped out of the doctor’s office, my heart heavy and light all at once. It thudded violently against my ribs, my breath coming in shallow bursts. My skin felt cold, and tears prickled at the corners of my eyes. The feelings surged, intensifying with every second, creeping into every cell of my body.
I felt lost. Hopeless. Overwhelmed.
Was I ready to be a mother?
I didn’t know.
Was it too soon? Maybe.
But not once, in the whirlwind of thoughts swirling in my mind, did the idea of harming the tiny soul growing inside me cross my mind. My decision had already been made before I even realized there was one to make. I knew what I was going to do.
I just didn’t know how.
Two and a half months. Probably from our time in America. And yet, until two days ago, the thought hadn’t even occurred to me.
Lost in thought, I pushed open the door to our apartment. The evening light filtered through the large windows, casting a warm glow. I froze when I spotted Jacob. He stood facing the mirror wall, his reflection framed by the city skyline.
He wasn’t supposed to be home yet.
“Jacob?” I asked, dropping my bag as I stepped closer. “When did you get home? You said you’d be late.”
He didn’t respond. His shoulders were tense, his posture unnervingly rigid. There was a calmness in his breathing, but an air about him told me he wasn’t calm at all.
I touched his shoulder. “Jacob? Are you okay?”
Slowly, he turned to face me. His expression was unreadable, but his eyes… they were cold. And then he lifted his hand, revealing something I hadn’t noticed before.
My pregnancy tests.
My stomach dropped.
“My work finished earlier, so I came home,” he began, his voice distant, icy. “I was about to call you, but I decided to freshen up first. While I was trying to reach you… I knocked over the bin.” He paused, holding the tests up slightly. “And this is what I found, Evelyn.”
The chill in his voice sent a shiver through me. This wasn’t how I wanted him to find out.
“How long have you known?” he asked, his tone sharp enough to cut through the thick air between us.
“Jacob, I can-”
“When, Evelyn?” he interrupted, his voice rising, demanding.
I swallowed hard, my palms slick with sweat. “Three days ago,” I admitted softly.
He exhaled sharply, his jaw tightening. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
I stepped closer, reaching for his hands, but he didn’t meet me halfway. “I wasn’t sure how,” I whispered. “I needed to be certain before saying anything. I didn’t want to stress you out over something that might not be true, so I went to the doctor today.”
“And?” His voice wavered, a glimmer of hope breaking through his stoicism.
I felt my heart shatter at the faint trace of hope in his voice-a hope that my answer might be “no.” But I couldn’t lie.
“Yes,” I breathed. “We’re pregnant, Jacob.”
He froze. The color drained from his face, his expression shifting to one of shock, fear, and something I couldn’t name.
“Jacob,” I whispered, stepping closer. “It’s our baby.”
He pulled his hands from mine and stepped back, the space between us suddenly vast.
He didn’t say anything, but his hand rubbed his forehead before sliding down to his jaw, the tension palpable. I could tell something was unraveling inside him. He was on the verge of panic, one breath away from losing control. But then he looked at me, exhaling deeply, his effort to keep it together evident.
And when he finally spoke, he said the last thing I’d ever expected.
“Get rid of it.”
I stared at him, blinking twice, my mind struggling to process the words. “What?”
His face remained unchanged, cold, unfeeling. He hadn’t just said that-he actually said it. No emotion. No remorse. He wanted our baby gone.
He stepped closer, locking eyes with me, his voice flat and stern. “Get. Rid. Of. It.”
His lack of emotion only deepened my anger, fueling the fear growing in my chest. He didn’t want our baby.
“What the fuck are you saying, Jacob? Get rid of it?!” I snapped, my voice shaking with a mix of fury and disbelief. “It’s our baby. Are you even hearing yourself?”
“Yes, I’m the only one in their right mind here, Evelyn,” he said, as if the answer was obvious. The coldness in his voice was a dagger, one I could feel tearing through me. “I’m telling you for your own good. It’s too soon for you to have a kid. You’re too young. Don’t even think about keeping it. It’ll ruin your life.”
I shook my head, unable to process his words. “You can’t be serious right now…” I whispered, barely able to breathe.
“Oh, I’m serious.” His voice grew louder, more forceful. “I’m fucking serious. So get rid of it, Evelyn.”
“This is our child, Jacob!” My voice cracked, frustration flooding my every word. “I can’t just do that!”
“So what do you want, huh?” he yelled back, his face twisted in anger. “You want to be a mother at this age when you haven’t even lived your own life? Can’t you see how young you are for this, Evelyn? We’ve got wedding plans, events, our lives ahead of us. We can’t just add another problem into the mix.”
Problem?
“Problem?!” I shouted, my eyes wide with disbelief and anger. “You’re calling our baby a problem? How could you-”
“Because it fucking is!” He exploded, his fists clenched, jaw tight, his eyes dark with rage. “We had it all planned out, and then this happens. It’s a mess. It’s ruining everything. What else is it but a fucking problem?!”
His words hit me like a punch. He didn’t just want to get rid of the baby-he saw it as a burden, a disruption.
I couldn’t breathe. I couldn’t think.
“You know what?” I finally spat, my voice trembling with fury. “If you don’t want to deal with this ‘problem,’ I’ll do it alone. You don’t have to be part of this. You can go and do whatever the hell you want, play your stupid plans and everything with someone else. But I’m not getting rid of our baby.”
For a long moment, he stood in silence, staring at me with dark eyes. His gaze was cold, void of anything I recognized in him. Then he spoke again, his tone venomous, “I’m not going to escalate this, so I’m leaving. We’ll talk when you’ve calmed down and can act like a sensible woman. Until then, I’m done with this.”
With that, he turned, storming toward the door.
“Then find a fucking sensible woman, you asshole!” I screamed after him, my words echoing through the apartment.
He didn’t reply. He just slammed the door shut, leaving me standing there, breathless and shaking.
I collapsed onto the couch, burying my face in my hands. But despite the tears threatening to spill, I managed to look down at my stomach. I couldn’t see it yet, but I knew the baby was there.
I forced a smile, the tears threatening to betray me.
“Don’t worry, baby,” I whispered, my voice shaky but determined. “Dad’s just mad. None of us are ever going to hurt you.”