Lorien’s POV
Sleep was impossible.
My body burned like a raging wildfire, molten heat coursing through my veins, setting every nerve alight with unrelenting need. Every inch of me was tense, restless, on edge. Desperate.
It had been days since my rut started, and every second was an agonizing battle against instinct. My body demanded release-demanded her. It screamed at me to claim, to knot, to breed, to mark, to fill. The primal urges were overwhelming, consuming, suffocating.
And Kamrynn was just in the next room.
I turned onto my side, gripping the couch cushion in frustration. My cocks ached, hard and heavy, throbbing painfully against my abdomen. My fangs pulsed with need, aching to sink into her soft skin. My claws twitched restlessly, curling into the fabric beneath me. It took every ounce of control I had not to storm into that room, throw her down, and take her the way nature intended.
She was mine.
I had chosen her for a reason. A dragon’s rut came once every five years, a primal period where our bodies reached peak fertility. We became insatiable, driven by a singular purpose: to breed, to pass on our clutch. My body was heavy with it, my seed thick and potent, ready to take root in the warm, willing body of my perfect breeder. She would nourish my eggs, incubate them, birth my hatchlings.
That was why I took her. That was her purpose.
So why the hell was I resisting?
My growl rumbled low in my throat, vibrating through my chest as frustration clawed at me. I rolled onto my back, staring at the ceiling, fists clenched. The herbal concoction I had been taking to suppress my rut instincts was losing its effectiveness. I could feel it, the way my control frayed at the edges. My heat was returning, the drug wearing off too soon.
And gods, Kamrynn’s scent.
She smelled perfect-sweet, intoxicating, right. Even without her being in the same room, I could smell her on the furniture, the blankets, the air itself. Her scent curled around me like a vice, seeping into my skin, branding me with longing. And if I could smell her, then she had to be drowning in my scent by now. It was meant to affect her, to prepare her body to receive me.
Was she feeling it too?
Was she lying awake in that bed, thighs pressed together, body betraying her?
I groaned, throwing an arm over my face. The thought alone sent a fresh wave of heat through me, a pulse of raw desire that made my cocks twitch in protest. I had to control myself.
I had to.
I had taken her for one reason-to repopulate my species. That was all. This wasn’t supposed to be complicated. I had stripped her of her memories, given her a new life where she belonged to me, where she would never question her place. It should have been simple.
But something had changed.
Somewhere along the way, she had stopped being just a breeder. She had become MY Kamrynn. My little wolf. My Elodie. She curled into me at night like she belonged there, spoke my name so sweetly it made me weak, smiled at me like I was her world.
She trusted me.
And I… I cared.
The thought made me sick. Dragons don’t care. We don’t mate. We don’t form foolish, emotional attachments. We breed based on strength, compatibility, and necessity. We don’t love.
But I wanted her. Not just as my vessel. Not just to carry my clutch. I wanted her.
The realization nearly undid me.
I gritted my teeth, forcing my breathing to slow, but the heat in my core refused to subside. My rut instincts didn’t care about my feelings. They didn’t care about morality or emotions or patience. They only cared that my perfect breeder was just a few steps away, untouched, unclaimed, ready.
And I was running out of time.
The longer I resisted, the more painful it became. My body was designed for this, built for it. If I held back much longer, the rut would take over completely, dragging me into a mindless, feral state. I couldn’t let that happen.
That was why I had been sleeping on the couch instead of beside her. The urges could return at any moment, and if I was next to her when they did, I wouldn’t be able to stop myself.
But gods, it was unbearable.
I shifted again, sweat clinging to my skin. My body was hot, so fucking hot. My hands curled into fists at my sides as I fought the need to grip myself, to ease the ache, to do something.
My mind tormented me with images. Kamrynn beneath me, her legs spread, her body pliant, slick, taking me so perfectly. Her gasping my name, her lips parted, her body trembling as I-
I sat up abruptly, digging my claws into my thighs to ground myself.
No.
I couldn’t let myself slip. I wouldn’t.
Even though every part of me was screaming to do the opposite.
I exhaled shakily, rubbing my face. Maybe I was a fool for holding back. She was mine. I had taken her. She belonged to me.
And yet… the idea of forcing her felt wrong.
The old me would have laughed at such weakness. A dragon does not hesitate. But this wasn’t hesitation. This was different.
Because I wanted her to want me.
I wanted her to look at me with longing, not fear or uncertainty. To choose me, not because she had no other options, but because she wanted to.
That’s why I had to tell her the truth.
I had planned to keep it from her forever, to let her live in the lie I had crafted so carefully. But now…
Now I wanted something more.
Not just her body. Not just the clutch we would create. I wanted her. Her thoughts, her heart, her soul. I wanted to be more than just her captor.
And after my rut ended, I would tell her the truth. The whole truth.
I wouldn’t give her back her memories-no, she was better off without them. I had seen her memories and they were…terrible. She had lived a life filled with pain and suffering, lost her parents at a young age and betrayed by everyone she knew and cared about. Got punished in all sorts of ways- beaten, tortured, even raped serially by the man she loved. Even escaping from him was not enough to make everything better.
The thought of that bastard, of what he had done to my precious Kamrynn set my nerves on nerve. My claws dug into the couch, nearly shredding it. I had made quick work of that coward and Sherelle had dealt the finishing blow but I knew better than to underestimate my enemies.
He wasn’t dead. I wasn’t sure but I just had a feeling and if I was correct, he would be looking for her. Let him come, I dear him. I would rip his guts out and feed them to the crows because someone like him didn’t deserve to even stand in her presence, much more be her mate.
Most of her memories were sad, filled with suffering. She had been through more than enough in her old life. She didn’t need to remember any of it.
Of could I expected push back when I told her the truth, it would only be natural when she realized she had been a hostage rather than a wife this whole time. Even if she pushed me away, even if she resisted at first, I wouldn’t let her leave. I would give her time. She would come around.
She had to.
Because the thought of letting her go was unbearable. We would become a happy family, a real one this time.
A low, frustrated growl rumbled in my throat as another wave of heat pulsed through me. My vision blurred for a moment, my muscles tensing against the agonizing need. My claws dug into the couch, tearing fabric, but I barely noticed. I needed to try to suppress this urge for a little while longer, I couldn’t give in now, not while I was so close to beating biology.
Just three more days.
That was how long this would last. How long I had to fight this instinct.
How long I had to resist the only thing I truly wanted.
Kamrynn.
My mate.