Calvin’s POV
The night stretched on, quiet and still, as I finally concluded my duties for the day. The weight of leading a struggling Pack never seemed to ease, but at least for now, I could leave it behind. Franklin stayed behind to organize the last of the documents, locking the office as I stepped out into the cool night air.
There was only one thing on my mind.
My children.
I made my way to their room, my steps slow but purposeful. The moment I opened the door, a soft melody greeted my ears.
Lysaa.
She was sitting on the rocking chair, gently swaying back and forth as she sang a lullaby to the twins. Her voice was quiet, soothing, almost like a whisper against the night. Astor and Arabella were lying in their crib, gazing up at her, their tiny hands curling and uncurling as if reaching for her voice.
My heart palpitated in my chest.
How could something so small, so fragile, hold such power over me?
Lysaa must have sensed my presence because she stopped singing and turned toward me. “You’re back.”
I nodded as if she could see me. “I’ll take over from here. Thank you, Lysaa.”
She hesitated for a second before rising to her feet, her fingers trailing along the crib one last time. “They were good tonight. A little fussy earlier, but they settled down.”
I exhaled a quiet chuckle. “They’re always a little fussy.”
A ghost of a smile flickered across her face before she walked past me toward the door. “Good night, Alpha.”
The door clicked shut behind her, leaving just me and my children.
I stepped closer to the crib, my fingers grazing the soft fabric as I peered down at them.
“Did you miss me?” I murmured, my voice barely above a whisper.
Astor’s little eyes fluttered, his lips parting as if in response. Arabella let out a soft sigh, her tiny fingers twitching before settling once more.
Dear goddess, they were perfect.
I carefully lifted them into my arms, one in each, their warmth pressing into my chest. The bond I felt with them was unlike anything else-it was terrifying and beautiful all at once.
Sitting down on the rocking chair, I cradled them against me, gently rocking them back and forth.
Astor let out a tiny yawn, his fingers curling against my chest, while Arabella nuzzled deeper into the warmth of my arms.
They were so small. So delicate.
And they were mine.
I had spent the past week doing everything I could to learn them. Their habits, their needs, their cries-everything. It had been a struggle at first. They had been wary of me, hesitant, crying for their mother whenever I held them for too long.
But now?
Now they nestled into me with trust.
Now they knew me.
I smiled softly, shifting them slightly to get comfortable.
There was this special song my mother used to sing to me when I was young, a lullaby whispered in the quiet of the night when I couldn’t sleep.
And without thinking, the familiar tune spilled from my lips.
Soft.
Low.
The melody wrapped around the room like a comforting embrace, soothing even me as it filled the silence.
Astor sighed, his tiny fingers unfurling as he settled. Arabella, who seemed wide awake only moments ago, let out a sleepy little hum, her breathing evening out.
And just like that…
They slept.
Safe. Warm. Protected.
I stood up as slowly as possible before moving over to their cradle and placing them in it as gently as possible. Arabella stirred but thankfully didn’t wake up. I pressed a gentle kiss to each of their foreheads before covering them with their blanket. They were my whole universe.
The room was silent except for the rhythmic sound of my children’s breathing. Their tiny chests rose and fell, their faces serene, untouched by the cruelty of the world.
Arabella’s small hand twitched in her sleep, her fingers curling slightly. Beside her, Astor let out a soft sigh, nuzzling deeper into the blankets.
I could watch them for hours.
I never thought I would love anything as much as I loved them. The depth of it shook me. It was the kind of love that made my heart ache, a love so strong that it left me feeling both powerful and utterly weak.
And yet…
As I looked at them, a question burned inside me-one I couldn’t ignore.
How did I turn out this way?
How did I become the kind of man who had to lose everything before realizing what was truly important?
I exhaled slowly, but it did nothing to ease the weight in my chest. And before I knew it, the past came rushing back, dragging me down into the memories I had buried for so long.
I was young again.
No throne. No responsibilities. No leadership.
Just a boy, standing in the middle of a grand training hall, my father’s hard eyes staring me down.
“An Alpha never cries!”
The words had been beaten into me as thoroughly as the training drills I endured every morning. My father, not that he ever treated me like a son, raised me like a mercenary.
“An Alpha does not show weakness. Love, empathy, regret, disappointment-these are the emotions of lesser men. Of prey.”
“You are not prey, Calvin. You are a predator. You are power itself.”
I had been so young, too young to understand what I was losing. All I cared about was earning his favor, of getting one less hit of the “disciplinary” crop.
So I buried them. All of them.
Every emotion my father deemed inferior, I locked away.
Love.
Empathy.
Excitement.
Regret.
Disappointment.
Even pity.
The only emotion I had been allowed-the only emotion that proved my dominance-was anger.
So I embraced it.
Every time I felt something too overwhelming, something I couldn’t explain or control, I turned it into rage.
It had always worked.
When my father died, I honestly couldn’t fully process the grief. Instead of mourning, I lashed out. I punished the servants unnecessarily. I demanded perfection from everyone around me and ruled with an iron fist.
And no one ever dared to stop me. Not even mother.
No one-except her.
Kamrynn.
She was the only one who ever stood up to me, the only one who didn’t fear my anger.
“Calvin, that was cruel!” she had snapped at me once, arms crossed, blue eyes blazing with fury.
I had barely spared her a glance. “He was incompetent.”
“He made a mistake. You could’ve just told him how to fix it instead of humiliating him.”
My jaw had tightened. “I don’t need to explain myself. I’m an Alpha.”
“And I’m your best friend, which means I get to tell you when you’re being a complete and utter jerk.”
Her words had stunned me.
Kamrynn had always been the only person who could do that-shut me down without fear, without hesitation.
I could never get mad at her. No matter how much she pushed me, no matter how much she called me out, I always conceded.
Because I hadn’t known it then but I was just so smitten with her.
She was the only person I had ever been able to cry in front of.
The only one who had held me as I mourned my father, her arms wrapped around me as I gasped for breath, as I let out years of sadness I had never been allowed to feel.
The only one who never judged me, never looked at me as if I were weak for needing comfort.
She had been everything.
Because no matter how much I had tried to bury my emotions, she had been there-soft, steady, kind. Always reminding me of what was important.
She had been my safe haven.
And I had destroyed her.
My grip on the cradle tightened.
How had we ended up like this?
Where had I lost myself?
I had always been told that emotions were weak, that vulnerability was a flaw. So I had smothered them, buried them so deep that even I had trouble finding them again. I had convinced myself that anger was the only emotion worth feeling, that dominance was the only path to power.
And yet-
Yet, it had all been a lie.
Because in the end, what had power given me?
I had lost Kamrynn.
I had spent years blinded by my own foolishness, refusing to acknowledge what had been right in front of me the entire time.
I loved her.
I had always loved her.
It would have been easy to blame Sherelle for everything. She had manipulated me, twisted my emotions, toyed with our very fates.
But no.
I was done blaming others for my own mistakes.
The truth was, I had been a coward.
Too afraid to admit that I loved Kamrynn. Too afraid to confront the way she made me feel. Too afraid to accept that she had always been my mate.
And because of that fear, I had pushed her away.
I had hurt her in ways that were unforgivable.
It had taken all this suffering, all this pain, for me to finally understand.
But for the first time in years, I felt like I could finally breathe.
My heart had thawed.
It was beating wildly now, calling for her.
I wanted to stand on the highest mountain and shout to the world just how much I loved Kamrynn Delamorte.
Nothing else mattered.
I would find her.
I would bring her back.
And I would spend the rest of my life proving to her just how much I loved her.
Even if it took until my dying breath.