Asher
I knew that Kayla cared for me but hearing her say how much she loved me, and how much she wanted me to love her back. It was too much for my heart and mind to handle. How hard must it have been for her all these while watching me treat her the way I did? How hard must it have been for her to hear me talk about my feelings for Emily?
She just endured it all like a strong woman whereas I acted like a weak man. She still stayed after Emily came back into my life, even after knowing that Emily was my mate and that I loved her so much. I closed my eyes as I remembered the way she had looked at me before she left the castle. I couldn’t remember ever seeing someone look that hurt and broken and knowing that I was the cause of her misery only made it harder to forget. I didn’t want to think about it. The more I did, the more I hated myself.
I still didn’t understand Kayla, she was different from the women I had been with. I had never been with a woman who supported me through my gloomy moments yet Kayla loved and cared for me through those hard times. What did I do to deserve her love? Absolutely nothing. All I did was put her life in danger and put her through the abyss of pain.
I held my head and leaned against the wall of my chamber. The castle felt empty without her. I kept looking at the door, hoping that she would change her mind and come back. My heart felt heavy and I couldn’t feel my legs since she left me.
I wanted to run after her and stop her from leaving. I wanted to beg her to stay. I wanted her to stay right by my side but I didn’t know how to do it since I didn’t have the answers that she was seeking. She wanted something that I wasn’t sure that I would be able to give her at the moment.
The truth remains there were alot of mysteries surrounding Emily’s disappearance and I needed to sort it out first.
Watching her leave was the most agonizing moment of my life. It took all of my self-control not to stop her from leaving but the pain and tears in her eyes were what kept me from doing that. Those tears were because of me, and I didn’t want to stop her and make her hurt more than I already did. I wanted to bring her back to me only when I had sorted out the mess in my life right now.
I needed to fix myself. I needed to heal my broken shredded heart before I could fully give myself to her and be able to adore her like the impeccable queen that she is.
I kept seeing the mirage of Kayla everywhere I turned. These random images kept appearing and torturing my soul. Her scent was slowly fading from the pillows and sheets and it was killing me slowly.
I instructed the servants not to touch anything in the chamber or even change the sheets. I wanted everything to remain exactly like she left it.
I picked up the blanket that once covered her body and inhaled it deeply. It wasn’t enough to soothe my aching soul. Kayla was the light in my life and now that she was gone all that was left was darkness.
I slowly dropped the blanket when my wolf sense picked up approaching footsteps a little distance away. “Who could it be”
The footsteps were growing closer and I straightened myself, thinking it could be Robin coming to check on me. He had done that multiple times since Kayla left. But I was wrong when a familiar scent hit my nose. She was the last person I wanted to see at the moment.
I scowled when Emily pushed the door open with a pillow and blanket in her hands. Why would she have those two items with her? What was she doing here?
Since Kayla left, I have tried to see if my heart and body would somehow yearn for Emily but I felt absolutely nothing, instead being in the same space with her irritated the fucking hell out of me.
“What are you doing here?” I asked, suspiciously as she moved towards the bed. I didn’t want her scent getting mixed up with Kayla’s. I inwardly groaned at my thoughts. How could I want her this much after getting back the woman I craved for years? I needed to accept that things were different between Emily and me.
She turned to me, her gaze resting on my face before her eyes slowly traveled to the blanket on the bed, and for a split second, I saw a tornado of hatred flash in her eyes but it could have been my imagination as her features were back to normal in a split second.
“I thought that since Kayla is out of our lives it’s high time for me to share your chamber with you. I am your legal wife and people would start to talk if they realize that we don’t share the same bed.”
I stiffened and had to fight the urge to throw her out of the chamber. This chamber had memories and the scent of Kayla all around it and with Emily in here all of that would change.
“I’m not ready for that Emily. It is best if you continue using the guest chamber.” I finally said after making up my mind that I didn’t want to share my space with someone else but Kayla.
Her eyes widened in shock. “Why are you still trying to create a distance between us? I thought with that tramp out of our lives, you would be more accepting of us but yet you haven’t accepted the reality.”
My jaw clenched. “Never you address Kayla like that ever again and if you wish to continue staying in this castle then we have to continue staying in separate chambers. This is my final decision.”
Before she could say anything more I stormed out of the chamber and out of the castle ignoring her angry calls. I didn’t waste any time as I morphed into my black wolf and headed towards the woods.
I ran through the woods and the chilly wind against my face did not calm me like it usually did. I kept on running and running as I was blinded by images of Kayla. Images of the first day I saw her in the council to the flashbacks of our wedding. I saw images of her naked body beneath mine. Damn! How much I cherished that heavenly bliss with her. And then I saw the images of the way she looked at me before she left. Her tearful and sorrowful gazes. I knew that those gazes would haunt me for the rest of my life.
I paused midway and crashed to the ground. I rolled over as a tree trunk crashed into the side of my right paws. I felt blood dripping down as I transformed back to my human body, laid back, and I felt my body overflow with emotions.
“Kayla,” I whispered as the image of her appeared before me like an exquisite jewel-like portrait.
“I’m sorry…I’m so sorry.” I felt a tear roll down my cheeks as the image of her disappeared. She wasn’t in front of me, it was just another imagination.
“Kayla,” I said louder this time, more hysterically. I let out a mighty roar as I stood up from the ground and ripped a tree out from the ground and threw it miles away from me.
“Kaylaaaaa!”
I shouted her name until my voice became croaky from all the shouting. When I finally finished with my outburst, my entire body was full of cuts and bruises.
Finally, I exited the woods and my body was slowly healing but the physical pain was nothing compared to those tears in her beautiful face.
I was about to head back to the castle when a sudden thought flashed through my mind. For a minute I couldn’t even move. I stood frozen like a statue.
How could I have not thought about this before? How blind was I not to see this sooner?
I morphed into my wolf and raced to my sister’s place. After what seemed like hours, I arrived at her place, transformed back, and wore back my clothes. Immediately she saw me, she walked over and hugged me.
“I heard what happened in the castle from Robin,” She said as she took a deliberate pause to look at me. “Why did you let her?”
I gave an audible sigh and looked away from her gaze. “Why did I let her go?”
It was a question even I didn’t know how to answer. I know I said it was for her good but what about mine? What about the pain I am feeling without her by my side? What about how broken I felt at the moment? Did I not care about my own feelings?
“My life’s a mess now sister. The chaos in my life was just too much and Kayla was getting tied up in it all. She was hurting and I was too stupid not to see it. I had broken her by the time I realized just how much she meant to me. I want to make things right before I bring her back.”
I moved closer and held her by the shoulders. “I want you to do something for me,” I told her. “I trust you and I can’t think of anyone better than you to do this.”
Her brows furrowed as she leaned against the wall. “Tell me, you know I will do anything as long as it makes you happy.”
“There is something that has been bothering me about Emily. Her disappearance seemed like a well-planned-out story and I feel there are more hidden unsaid stories. She doesn’t act like someone who has been held hostage for a while. If what she says is true then why hasn’t there been an attack on the castle?
Why isn’t she asking me to find her captors and make them pay for all the pain, torment, and wasted years? She doesn’t seem bothered or scared about any of this and it doesn’t seem normal to me.” I explained
Dami nodded. “I also have the same opinion as you. Her story has a lot of missing puzzles and I believe she is definitely hiding or lying about something.”
I ran a hand through my hair and let out a frustrated sigh. “Please Dami, I want you to find everything you can about her. Search around for clues or anyone who must have seen her around any of these years. If you need any help, kindly seek out Robin. This secret is just between the three of us, no other person should find out about it.”
“You can trust me on this brother? I won’t disappoint you.” She said, grinning.
I needed to find out the real truth about what really happened four years ago. The more I think about it, the more I feel like there is an evil storm looming around.