Natalia
Usually, when I nap, I feel better, but my stomach is sore, and I still feel like I want to throw up. The thing that I’ve started to notice, though, is that it’s at the strangest times that I feel sick. Take today, for example, hours after breakfast with nothing that could have triggered it. I need to tell Daniel to arrange a doctor for me. I’m getting worried.
I leave my bedroom and walk to the kitchen. He’s not there though his computer is in. It’s tempting, I won’t lie, but I walk away, calling his name, “Daniel?”
“In the living room.” He sounds strange, almost as though he’s strained.
I walk into the living room. He’s sitting on the sofa with a package in his hands. He’s staring at it.
“What’s that?”
“Why were you looking for me?” he asks quietly. “Before we get into what this is.”
I frown and sit opposite him. “I think I’ve contracted a bug of some sort. I feel nauseous all the time, and my stomach hurts. Now you don’t know me that well, but I’m not someone who gets ill easily. I would appreciate it if you could arrange for a doctor to see me.”
He looks up at me with curious eyes and nods. “I’ve noticed you haven’t been well. I’m observant. That’s why I got you this, just in case.”
I take the package and start to rip it open. The box falls onto my lap, and I pick it up. The words pregnancy test are glaring at me on the box. My blood runs like ice, and I shiver.
“No. No way. There isn’t a possibility.” I look up at him, worried.
“Were you taking birth control?” he asks, raising an eyebrow.
“Cause you haven’t asked for any while you’ve been with me.”
I stare at him, calculating when last I took birth control. No, I hadn’t in the longest time. NTypically I take the morning-after pill if something happens because it honestly doesn’t happen that often. I look at him with wide eyes. “It’s way too early to have signs, surely.”
He shakes his head. “I researched it. Around two weeks after conception.”
“It hasn’t been that long,” I gasp.
“We’re heading into week six.”
I’d completely lost track of time. No wonder my family is freaking out. Days just blend into each other when you are bored like that. I stand up. “It can’t be.”
“There’s a chance to find out. Go do the damn test.” He stands as well. “Do you… need help?”
“I can pee on a stick,” I snap, panicking.
“Calm down.” He holds his hands up. “I’m trying to help. If it’s negative, I’ll get a doctor to give you a once over and see what’s up with your stomach.”
I nod, letting out a deep breath. “Exactly. It’s probably nothing.”
I hurry out of the room and to the bathroom in the hallway. I shut and lock the door and rip the packaging open. I read the paper, insert instructions, and nod. “Easy enough.”
It’s possibly the weirdest thing I’ve had to do, but so be it. I cap the stick and set it on the basin.
“Did you do it?” Daniel calls through the door.
“We have to give it a few minutes,” I yell angrily.
“Open the door so we can see the results together. I don’t trust you.” I yank the door open. “Seriously, can I not have some privacy?”
“This concerns us both.”
We both fall silent and stare at the stick, waiting.
I fucking hate waiting.
“If it’s not showing anything, that’s good, right? It has to show a cross, right?” He looks at me curiously.
I am breathing hard. “I don’t fucking know. I’ve never been pregnant before.”
We stare at the stick, and then we both lean forward as the little plus sign forms. I don’t know who’s more horrified. I can sense the dread washing over Daniel, but I need to sit down because my legs will give out from underneath me.
I never wanted children, ever. It was never my thing, and I’ve always been so careful. There’s a level of expectation in my family, bearing children, and I didn’t want to conform to that. But now that it’s in me, his baby is in me, I know I don’t have the heart to rip it out.
I look at him angrily and stand up, pushing him away. “You’re not forcing me to have an abortion.”
“Woah!” Daniel holds his hands up. “Roman Catholic here. We don’t believe in abortions.”
“You don’t believe in murder either, yet here we are.” I point out.
He sighs and frowns, “Look, the bottom line is even if I didn’t want children, I’m not going to force you to have an abortion. I would prefer you didn’t. If you don’t want the kid, I’ll take it.”
“I didn’t say I didn’t want my child.” I glare at him.
It’s a silent standoff as we stare into each other’s eyes.
“I’ll call my cousin and tell him about the development. I’ll ask him to call off the bounty hunters.” I cross my arms over my chest. “I don’t like the situation, but I don’t want my baby’s father dead.”
“No, telling Ivan I got you pregnant will probably just encourage him to kill me rather than deter him.” I look around and then run a hand through my hair. “We’re moving locations. I assume you know how to pack lightly for quick travel. Meet me in the kitchen in ten. Tell no one we’re moving. It isn’t safe now that we have a baby on the way. They’ll use that to their advantage.”
He leaves, and I go to my room. I find a bag in the closet and pack some clothes for warm and cool weather, and I pack an extra pair of trainers. I pack toiletries because I don’t know what will be available at our next location. I don’t even know how Daniel will find something so quickly.
I get to the kitchen and wait. Daniel comes in from the garage, surprising me. “You ready?” he asks, leaning forward to take my bag. I hand it to him and follow him.
“I’m not fragile.”
“Just get in the car.” He isn’t open to arguments.
He pulls into traffic and starts to drive. He stops for gas twice and changes directions, I don’t know how many times, so even I don’t know where we are eventually.
We leave the city; that’s what I notice before I doze off.
The bumpy road is what wakes me up, and I look around. Trees surround us. He has the heat on in the car, and the headlights are set to bright. It’s already pitch dark around us.
I see an open garage door ahead and ask, “Is this where we’re staying? How far out are we?”
“Far enough.” He pulls into the garage and hits the clicker, closing the door behind him.
I insist on taking my own bag and follow him into the house. It’s a cabin, but a relatively modern one. He turns on the lights and looks around.
“This will do.”
I set my bag down and rubbed my stomach, feeling sick again.
“I’m going to make you something to settle your stomach. My ma was great with that sort of thing.”
He walks over to a gas stove and lights a plate, putting a kettle on to boil. I don’t know if I should trust him even though he seems determined to want this child. I don’t even know why I’m fighting it so hard or going with him wherever he tells me to. It just seems that this is the thing we agree on.
I watch Daniel take out some lemons, a bottle of crushed ginger, and other herbs. I sit at the table in the center of the room and watch him. “Is your mom still around?”
“No,” he says, clearly not interested in expanding on the topic. “I know yours is in Europe.”
“You seem to have an unfair advantage over me, you have my background, but I know nothing about you.” I pick at the quicks around my nails, a nervous habit from childhood.
He sighs and nods. “That’s because there’s nothing to know except that I kill people for a living and am very good at it.”
“You didn’t kill me,” I state it as a fact rather than a question.
After he’s filled the glass of herbs, lemon, and ginger halfway with hot water, he takes out some cold bottled water and tops it off.
“That’s so it doesn’t burn when you sip it,” he says as he sets it in front of me. “Sip that. I’ll go run you a bath.”
“I’m not incapable…”
“Don’t.” He looks at me. “I need to process this, and the best way I process things is to help do things. While you’re in the bath, I’m going to get us settled. We are further away from danger. I had been planning to move to this location regardless. It’s out of the city.”
I don’t argue, and he leaves the room. I sip the drink, and it is soothing. I love things with lemon in them, and I think I detect some honey in the drink. I hear the bath running and sigh softly. After the long uncomfortable drive, a soak would be nice. My body feels much more tender lately, probably because of the pregnancy.
After a while, I hear the water shut off, and he returns. “Your bath is ready. I’m going to make a fire to warm the place up. You have a soak, and then come out and get warm. Anything we need, I’ll sort out tomorrow.”
I nod and finish my drink before leaving to soak in the bath. I can hear the distinct sounds of wood being set on fire; the crackling of the fire echoes in the silence of the night. The water is nice and hot, and I rest with my hands on my belly.
Fuck.
Daniel
I leave Natalia soaking in the bath and the fire roaring in the living room. She can’t miss it, and I’m sure she’ll like roasting in front of the crackling flames.
I have things to do outside while she is getting comfy. I must secure our perimeter and ensure no one will catch us off-guard. I doubt anyone managed to follow us out here, but you never know; always be weary. It’s how I’ve stayed alive over the years.
I start on the outer section. The traps are technically already in place. The wires just need to be brought up and activated, and the traps reset. Natalia didn’t ask how I found our first home, so she doesn’t know about Mick. She didn’t ask how I found this cabin; then she’d know that the Quinn family owns many hideaways in the wilderness because that’s where we like to vanish to when things are too hot.
I want to say it doesn’t happen often, but that would be a lie.
Once the outer perimeter is done, I work through three more waves of traps, making four safety rings around the cabin.
I reach the last few trip wires that need to be set up, then I set up a ladder and climb onto the roof to put in the batteries for the solar cameras. The batteries should enable them to run tonight and then charge during the day. It gets steadily colder as the night progresses, but I ensure we’re entirely safe before I walk through the garage, into the kitchen, and look around.
The fire has died down, and I go to check on Natalia, but she’s not there. I go to check the bedrooms, but they’re empty, and her packed bag is gone.
She’s made a run for it.
I immediately panic because I know she will trigger one of the traps and potentially injure or kill herself and our baby.
I grab my phone, the only device linked to the sensors and hurry out.
She can’t have gotten far because she hasn’t already triggered anything. She must have waited until I came down from the roof to make a dash for it because I would have seen her open and close the door from up there.
My phone beeps, and I look at the notification. South West, she’s just triggered a sensor. That’s fine, except if she’s walking in a straight line, she will trigger one of our more medieval traps involving a swinging club with nails driven through it.
I run for her, stumbling every so often over tree roots and bushes, but I don’t let that delay me too long. Ahead I see the brightness of a flashlight; it has to be her.
“Natalia! Stop!” I shout to her, and she tries to move faster, encumbered by her bag. She drops it and starts to run. She’s only a few feet away from the trip wire.
I don’t know what drives me, but I sprint faster and reach her just as she sets the trip wire off. My outstretched hand grabs a handful of her jacket, luckily zipped up, and I yank her backward. We both trip over and land on our asses.
The flashlight has fallen next to us, and in the light, we see the club swing hurried past, and I turn to see her eyes widen.
I get up and angrily stand over her. “Are you a fucking idiot? You knew you couldn’t just walk out here.”
“I know you won’t kill me,” she yells, clambering to her feet. I reset the trap, turning my back on her.
“No, I won’t kill you. But right now, you enjoy a lot of freedom of movement which I will severely restrict if you try something stupid again. I’ve been protecting you, have I not?” I look at her once I’m done. She’s standing there shivering. I don’t know if it’s from the cold or fear.
“I have to think about the baby now, and being on the run isn’t safe.” She looks up at me; she’s rebellious and resilient.
I step towards her, then bend down and pick up the flashlight. “We’ll get your bag along the way. We just need to stop to reset the other tripwire that you triggered. Luckily that was the one that notified me where you were, or you’d be dead.”
She walks beside me, and I sigh. “Did you think for a moment that maybe you are safer with me on the run?” I glance at her. “Because I can tell you, they know you’re a Volkov, and there will be nowhere Ivan can hide you from them. At least I’m less likely to get us found.”
She sniffs, and I stop to pick up her bag. She holds her hand out to take it, but I shake my head. “Keep walking.”
Which we do in silence in the dark forest.
“You’re acting like a child,” I comment when I pause to reset the last tripwire. “You’re in your early thirties; having lived the life you have, you should be smarter about this entire situation.”
“Everything just feels different,” she comments. “Especially now that I’m pregnant. I don’t feel weaker or less intelligent, just more scared.”
I turn and take her hand, pulling her into my arms. I hold her tightly. “I know. It is scary. It’s nothing either of us wanted, but it’s happened, and now we have to try to make the best of it while we run for our lives. I promise I’ll find a way to end the bounty placed on your head, and then we can go our separate ways if that’s what you want and give me visitation rights.”
She shivers in my arms, and I stroke her back. “Come on, lass. I’ll get the fire going again.”
We make it to the cabin, and I let her in ahead of me. I take her bag back to her room, sure that she won’t make another run for it. She’s sitting on the sofa when I return, a small blanket covering her lap.
I bend in front of the fire and start working on getting it back to its former glory.
“Why are you doing this?”
The question catches me off guard, and I don’t look at her.
“Doing what?” I ask quietly.
“You should have killed me, but you didn’t. You married me instead and have protected me. Now you’re promising me safety and redemption for my actions. Why would you inconvenience yourself like that? What do you get out of it?” Her words wash over me, and I feel like my brain’s gone on vacation.
I sigh, staring into the little flames that have started crackling. I pile on more wood. “I don’t know why I’m doing this. I don’t even know what this is.”
I blow on the fire gently, and the wood starts to catch alight. I rest back on my haunches and watch it for a moment before I get up and sit on the armchair to her right.
I look at her grimly. “I’ve always preferred being alone, even when I was a child. My mother always wanted me to make friends like my brothers did. I was a black sheep in the family. Irish people are very sociable, I’ll have you know. Aye, nothing like a pint and chat at the local pub. But I wasn’t like that. I didn’t want to play soccer with the other children, and I didn’t want a girlfriend. I got laid plenty and broke many hearts, luckily didn’t get anyone pregnant.”
She snorts, and I smile at her softly. “Being around you confuses me. I don’t like emotion. I like knowing what I’m doing, where I’m going, why, and how much I’m getting paid to do it. I don’t take time to get to know my hits personally. I don’t care if they beg for their lives.”
“I didn’t beg for mine.”
“Yeah, but before that, at the bar, I knew you were different. Your whole, I don’t know, vibe is what they call it? Your energy, or whatever, just drew me in, and I knew you’d be good for some fun. So when I saw you there, I just… I got confused, and since then, you have made me feel awkward and weird. No one has ever made me feel that way, lass.”
I fidget in my seat and look at the fire, now roaring and filling the room with cozy warmth. “I feel like it’s my place to protect you from everything and everyone. I’ve felt that way since the moment I walked into the warehouse and they pulled that sack off your head. Something about you ignites this primal urge to keep you safe, to keep you near me. I don’t want others to have you or hurt you. I will kill to keep you safe, at no additional charge, may I add.”
I look at her finally and see her looking at me with disbelief.
I’ve definitely said too much.