CLIO
It had actually been kind of nice getting back to campus early while the place was still a ghost town. It let me catch my breath from the whirlwind summer. I’d faced down Michael and discovered that he didn’t have any power over me, nor did anybody else with their snide comments.
Now, however, the start of school was quickly approaching, and the closer it got, the more nervous I got. I’d gotten into a routine with my students and with Sydney since I’d been back, but I had no idea how I was going to react when I saw Lila again. I wasn’t completely certain that I wouldn’t just dissolve into a puddle of tears while begging her to forgive me and asking about her dad. What a mess.
I remembered that her internship was set to end the previous week, so it was only a matter of time before I saw her again. I’d be lying if I said I didn’t get a little nervous every time I went somewhere we used to always hang out at, especially the restaurant. We’d eaten there at least twice a week, and now, I was picking up extra shifts when I could to make ends meet. I knew it was just a matter of time, and sure enough, one night she came in to pick up a to-go order. I was in the kitchen helping with rolling silverware, but I could see her through the order-out window.
She saw me, too, and we stared at each other for a long, awkward moment. No matter how hard my brain told my body to move or my mouth to say something, I was frozen. Finally, I managed to get myself together enough to give her a small wave. She didn’t wave back, just turned on her heel and hurriedly left with her order.
Okay, I told myself, the Band Aid has been ripped off. It’ll only get easier to see her now, right?
I kept saying that to myself, even though I knew deep down that wasn’t going to be the case. Impulsively, I pulled out my phone and pulled out the last text message that Aidan had sent me a few days before:
Aidan: I will quit bothering you, Clio, but I can’t stop loving you. I’ll be here waiting for you whenever you’re ready…
I wanted so badly to answer him, even though I had no clue what I would say to him. His voice stayed in my head on a seemingly constant loop, and I missed the sound of it against my ear. None of the guys at school seemed intimidating anymore. Instead, they seemed kind of boring and pale in comparison to Aidan. I wondered if I would compare everyone to Aidan for the rest of my life, hating that my gut told me I would. God, I missed him.
“Hey, I just saw Lila leave. Are you okay?” Sydney asked as she came into the kitchen.
I nodded, even though I was far from it.
Sydney looked torn before she finally said, “She still cares about you, Clio. She messaged me a few days ago wanting to know how you were doing.”
“She did?” I asked in disbelief.
Sydney nodded. “Yeah, I’m probably being a bad friend because she told me not to tell you, but you should really know.”
I felt a little surge of hope spark inside me. “Thanks, Sydney, and don’t worry-you’ve been an awesome friend.”
She smiled at me, then hefted up one of the trays full of orders that were ready to go, making her way out of the kitchen.
So, Lila wanted to make sure I was okay…maybe there was hope, after all.
***
When I’d moved in with Sydney, it was with the understanding that she was planning on renting to another person as well. The only problem was that the third bedroom in the house had been trashed by the previous renters, so it needed a lot of work. Sydney hadn’t had the time or finances to fix it by herself, but we’d agreed when I’d moved in to fix it up together. With some extra shifts at the restaurant, we’d managed to scrape enough together to get some paint and rent a carpet cleaner. The rest of the damage would just have to be taken care of with good, old elbow grease.
The weekend before the fall semester was set to start, Sydney and I were feverishly trying to make that third bedroom presentable because Sydney said she had some strong interest from somebody to rent, and she thought they would be a good fit with us. We’d gotten up early and scrubbed the room down, and now, we were in the throes of putting a fresh coat of paint on the walls.
I took a step back and admired our progress. “So, what time is this person supposed to be here?” I asked.
“She said she’d drop by sometime this afternoon. I think you’ll love her, Clio. I’m really excited for you two to meet,” she enthused.
We took a break to eat, then got right back at it. Sydney filled the silence with a pleasant chatter that didn’t really require much of a response, and my brain wandered to Aidan. I wondered what he was doing and if he was still at the beach house or if he’d gone back to L. A. I knew he said he’d wait for me, but I couldn’t help but shake the feeling that once he got back home and back in his routine that he’d forget over time. Maybe he had found someone else already. The thought made me stop, and a panicky feeling raced through me.