My feet took me to the flowery paradise of Baguio, where Cal was conceived. I don’t know why, but as soon as I set foot in this place again, I felt a sense of relief. I felt, in an instant, all my resentment towards myself disappear.
It has been weeks since I decided to live by myself. Nope, I’m not alone anymore. I’m with Cal, who now seems to be growing up more than when I last left Mondalla Residences. I am living in peace. Not once have I received a call from Ismael or anyone from my family or his family. They are really respecting my decision to have some time for myself. It’s true that my life has been filled with too many bad memories these past few days, but because of this decision of mine, the memories that Ismael and I made together have become more prominent.
I wiped my tears from my cheeks as they trickled down again. No matter what, when it comes to Ismael, I burst into tears on my own. I admit it; I miss him so much. I feel like he’s the same to me because he visits me in my dreams every night. He replaced all the nightmares that used to bother me.
I’m now here on the farm where I’m temporarily having fun and making perfume. At first they didn’t accept me because they said I was pregnant, but because they found a job for me that was just sitting, they let me in. A perfumer, literally just someone who smells perfume to see if their mixture is good or not. They say that since I’m pregnant, my sense of smell is even stronger, so they also ask me for suggestions. It’s a good thing that I learned a lot from Safira and LMC, especially from Ismael when we visited Europe, so the owner of this small perfume shop is pleased with me. I’m also happy because I get a free supply of flowers here. They let me pick daisies.
I smiled again. It felt wonderful to look at the beautiful and fragrant flowers around. It felt like the world was lighter. And I wasn’t the only one who was happy because Cal had been moving around in my belly for a while. It seemed like he also liked what we were doing together.
I said goodbye to them when five in the afternoon hit. I headed straight to the market to buy vegetables that I would cook for dinner. I also didn’t forget about fruits like apples and bananas. The doctor told me that it was better for me to eat nutritious food, which I often eat every day. I used the money that Sir Mikael gave me back then. I didn’t want to use the black card that Ismael gave me because I knew that if I used it, he would know where I was.
I was about to hop into a tricycle when someone called my name. “Jothea?”
I turned around to find the voice that called my name. And I was surprised to see someone I didn’t expect to see.
“Mrs. Veonna?”
“What are you doing there? Come in. I’ll drive you home!” She invited me. I showed her the vegetables I brought for the dish I was planning to cook, and I was oblivious when she told me it’s fine.
I was in her car as we drove down the road to my little house. I couldn’t speak and just kept staring out the window. She was just busy driving the car.
I don’t really know if she’s aware of my requests to Ismael, but seeing her be kind to me, I don’t know anymore.
“Are you sure you live here, hija?” she asked.
“Yes,” I answered. “Thank you very much for bringing me,” I added, and I was about to get off when she spoke.
“Can I come in for a moment?”
I swallowed. I don’t know why, but I let her into my house.
“I’m sorry, my house is tiny. This is the cheapest in La Trinidad,” I apologized before giving her a small cushion to serve as her seat.
“I don’t mind, hija. I grew up even smaller here. How are you now?”
I’m not used to the way she talks to me like this. Back then, when she yelled, it was as if she was really mad at me because we were interfering with her plans for Danjer. I don’t know what made her change her mind to talk to me like this.
“I’m fine, Ma’am Veonna.”
“Are you still planning to go back?” she inquired. This confirms that she knew about my request and my situation with Ismael.
I remained silent. It had been a month since I had been away from Ismael. “You see, I am not here to convince you to go back. I just coincidentally saw you earlier, and I don’t know what pushed me to call you.”
“Are you here because of what I said? Are you hesitating to be in Mondalla’s family?” she added. The way she looked at me was deep, like a mother worrying about her child. I don’t know why I felt that way for a moment.
I shook my head. “I am hesitating if I deserve it all, Ma’am Veonna. Everything in Mondalla seems too good to be true, and to have such a privilege to experience it, I don’t think it is for me.”
“Every woman feels like that, Jothea, but good things shouldn’t be questioned about,” she said. “I understand that you need time for yourself, but not everyone has the time to wait. Ismael is turning twenty-nine years old this year. How old would he be after your twelfth child?”
I thought about what she said. Although Ismael and I had already discussed that we didn’t need to follow the tradition of having twelve children, I couldn’t help but feel sad. Am I being too selfish and not thinking about him?
“Will he still be able to see your children and grandchildren if he gets married? Will he still be able to see your grand grandchildren?” She kept asking me. “I didn’t mean to pressure you, hija, but just like everybody’s thinking this way, we are all worried about the family and the future generations. I wouldn’t stay here if I didn’t care about this family.”
I just stared at her, while understanding everything she was saying that I had never thought about before. I understood why they wanted to continue the tradition. They wanted so much to spread the lineage of good people in the world. It’s true, if there was one person I knew who was the best in the world, it was Ismael, who was one of the Mondallas.
Tears welled up in my eyes even though I didn’t let Ma’am Veonna see them, but when she gave me a handkerchief, it seemed like all the sadness I was harboring came out. It’s nice to live alone. It is quiet. No problems. But I realized that it was hard to breathe, especially at night, because the cold was biting my bones more because I was used to being next to Ismael.
“No need to rush, but think about what I said.” That was her last word before leaving me. She also promised not to tell anyone about our meeting. The coincidental meeting with her left me with a thought that kept me awake that night. Am I too consumed by the past that I have difficulty accepting the good now?
Many days passed before I realized what day it was. The sun was already high, so I decided to go outside and take a walk. I didn’t have work today, so I was free to go for a walk with Cal.
I held my stomach when it kicked loudly. Next came the stop of a large white van in front of me. My eyebrows knitted when it opened, but what worried me more was the men getting out and violently grabbing my hand to get into the car.
“H-hey! Where are you taking me? Who are you?” I shouted but because of that they gagged me. I struggled with tears to break free from their grip, but they were stronger than me, and there were more of them.
What is this again? Why is this happening? Who are they? I fell silent.
I continued to scream and thrash around inside the car, but they didn’t let go of me. They didn’t speak either. Their faces were covered, and compared to natural kidnappers, they were dressed in a dignified manner. Dark brown tuxedos.
The car stopped, and one by one they got out, but before they could close the door, they tied my hands and blindfolded me. I cursed in my mind several times while mentioning Ismael’s name because he was the only one I could think of when I was in danger. He was the only one I asked for help from after God.
Tears welled up in my eyes. I wanted to repent for leaving Ismael before. I thought it was all over because the siblings were in jail. Were there still people I had wronged in the past who were taking revenge on me now?
I should’ve stayed. I shouldn’t have left Ismael again even though I told him I would prove to him that I wouldn’t leave him, but because I was selfish again, I did it again.
Ismael…
I heard the door suddenly open. I felt someone enter. “Who are you?” I asked, but I knew he wouldn’t understand because something was blocking my mouth.
A cold hand touched my skin. My body stiffened as he pulled down the sleeves of my dress. I struggled to keep him from undressing me, but he finally did it. I cried and just tried to accept my fate.
He also touched my hair, but I was surprised when he tied it. Next, he put my clothes on me. I don’t understand. What was happening? I was even more nervous.
He removed the cloth that was placed over my mouth, so I had the chance to speak. “W-who are you?”
“Secret.” A woman’s voice answered. Familiar.
“What do you need from me?” I asked as the fear overflowed my chest.
“Nothing, but the one waiting outside has.” Something touched my lips. It slid all over my lips. “This is the most chaotic plan I have ever known,” she said while laughing before removing the blindfold from my eyes.
My eyes hurt when I saw her. “Savannah?!”
She smiled at me, and like the men earlier, he was also dressed in a fancy way. An elegant light brown dress. I tried to embrace her but realized my hands were still tied. She helped me take it off, and that’s when I noticed the change in my outfit.
“What is this? Why am I wearing a wedding gown?” I exclaimed.
She didn’t answer; instead, she said something else. “Let’s fix yourself. You don’t want them to see you like this, right?”
I looked in the rearview mirror. My hair was fine, but my face wasn’t, not because of my constant crying earlier. “What’s going on, Savannah?”
“Later, Jothea. You’ll know later, but for now, cooperate with me.”