YARA’S POINT OF VIEW
I woke up to the sound of beeping hospital machine, a heart monitor was beside me as well as I sleeping Walter, he will never leave me alone even, he would never let me go free, even after my suicide attempt he still sits her by my side like a jailer waiting to take me back to my cell.
I tried to sit up but I felt too weak and immediately fall back to the bed, the sound from my fall wakes Walter up.
“Why did you do it? Why did you try to kill your self?” Walter said his expression was completely emotionless. I turned and looked away at the hospital wall, I felt my head starting to spin uncontrollably.
“Something is not right, call the doctor.” I said to Walter and then fainted. I woke up to a document in front of me, it looked like a ten years marriage contract, I felt the coldness of a metal on my head.
“Sign this or I will blow your brain out.” Walter said as he pointed a gun to my head. I felt scared, I really don’t understand this fear because was I not the one who had wanted to die a while ago? And now someone is offering to give that to me on a silver platter and I’m getting scared?
“Please don’t hurt me.” I said with tears coming down from my eyes, my fist wrapped tightly around my light blue hospital gown.
“Just sign the damn contract Yara! I swear I never want to hurt you but you making loving you so difficult sometimes.” Walter said with the gun still pointed at me, his expression still emotionless.
The beeping of the heart monitor continued steadily, I could feel and hear my heart beating. If only anyone can save me, I know nobody would, nobody saved Olivia and now no one would save me.
I looked at the contract, picked up the pen by the side and signed it, my life along with it, how do I survive with this monster? What if he murders me like he did Olivia.
______________***_____________
We walked down the red carpet, Walter’s hand held mine in a tight grip, he never lets me out of his sight even for one second. I squinted as the lights from the numerous cameras continued to flicker on and off.
I would never get used to the lights or the red carpet or people know my name, people knowing who I am, I try my best to be a good celebrity, to smile even when all I want to do is cry my eyes out, to support my husband Walter even when all I want to do is tell everyone the truth about him, I don’t think I will ever get used to acting like everything is alright, I don’t think I would ever get used to being the American sweetheart that Olivia was.
We walked down the red carpet, smiling looking like the love filled couple that people expect us to be, we answered some reporters questions, they were mainly questions about Walter’s career, his movie and everything about him, I don’t even think they know anything about me, what is there to know anyway just a caged celebrity wife.
Walter and I walked into the award show’s venue and took our seats on our reserved spaces next to another celebrity couple both of them movie stars. The award show was like any other award show I have been to lately; boring, performative sometimes unbearable.
After the show was over I excused myself to go to the restroom to touch up my makeup before heading out through the swam of reporters and into the limousine that would take Walter and I back to his estate.
The restroom was quiet at first when I got in and then probably three seconds in I started to hear some sound; loud moaning, low groans, banging against the stalls. Disgusting! Who fucks in restrooms nowadays? I mean you have your car to fuck if that is the kind of thing you are into, you can do your private bathroom but a public restroom at an award show! Ewww!
I ignored the banging noises and continued to touch up my makeup when the culprit came out of the stall and… oh my Gosh… it’s my husband… what the hell! I stared at them with my eyes opened wide trying to comprehend how and why!
“Walter.” I said not sure how I feel, I should feel jealous but I don’t the only thing I feel is anger, I feel angry about this facade called marriage, angry that he would cheat on me the way he just did and yet when I so much as look at a man he brings hell down on me, he has taken my life away from me and from now on I’m going to take it back, I am going to do whatever I want!
I stormed out of the restroom, he did not even try to chase after me, he just went back to what he was doing.
He does not care about me! I don’t care about him then why the fuck are we married?!
I felt the anger starting to topple over, I was not looking at where I was going, I just wanted to get into a taxi or something and drive far away from here, I know he would find me and force me to go back home to him but I just need some space from everything even though it is just for a little while.
Still walking like a dragon ready to breathe out fire I bumped into someone. I quickly apologized and tried to walk away, he held me by my arm and pulled me back.
“Don’t you think you owe me a drink for bumping into me like that?” He asked with a coy flirtatious smile on his face.
My anger came out in a rush that I definitely could not contain.
“Owe you are drink?! Are you fucking serious?! You men like to think that everything is all about you don’t you?! That everyone on Earth was created to bring you pleasure! You say I owe you a drink for bumping into you! Well it isn’t my fault that you walk like a stupid penguin!” I yelled and then immediately felt stupid for yelling.
“I’m sorry, I have just been having a bit of a long day.” I apologize for the second time.
“Yikes boyfriend troubles?” He asked.
“Husband… husband troubles.” I said with a sigh.
“Waow you don’t look married.” He said.
“How do married people look.” I asked with a chuckle.
“I don’t know… married?” He said joining me in my chuckle.
“Hey since we have kinda sorta become friends what do you think about that drink?” He asked with a cajoling smile.
I wanted to say something but then he interrupted.
“I’m paying of course, since you have something against owning people drinks'” he teased doing the air quote. I laughed.
“Alright but not here.” I said. The best way to evolve is by meeting new person besides what is the worse that can happen??
___________***___________
I held on to the invitation card the guy I bumped into who’s name I now know to be Blake have to me. It is to something he called “the summer yatch party” according to him it is the most anticipated party in all of Hollywood and since it is an exclusive event that may involve borderline illegal activities it is not really broadcasted, it stays a secret, only a very few number of elites are invited and since his father is the one hosting this year’s one he would be able to get me in.
I quickly tucked the invitation card into the bed when I saw my husband walked in from the adjoining room. He frown like as if he suspected something but soon relaxed and slid into the empty space next to me. He held me and started touching and kissing me, I closed my eyes ready to escape this particular moment through my imaginations and most likely fake a couple of moans. I don’t know when I stop feeling anything for Walter but I did and now I can not go back to feeling something for him.
“You know she means nothing to me, you are the one I love.” Walter said into my ears when he came. I bet that is exactly what he told her right there in the restroom. He was fast asleep, I got up from the bed took a quick shower, making sure to remove every trace of him from my skin I wish it was as easy to remove every trace of him from my memory.
I went back into our room, picked up the novel I have been trying to finish, in my night gown I walked out of the house and into the cottage by the beach, I watched the water flow to the land oddly enough I felt like someone was watching me…