ALESSIA
That day, I had this idea in mind on how I could avoid Claude, at least from dropping me off at school. The Robertsons had personal drivers, and I knew that if I ask one of them to drive me to school, it would not be much of a bother for them
“Can I just ask your driver to drop me off later? I do not want to bother Claude,” I pleaded as I faced the dining table that morning. I arrived earlier than Claude. I made an effort to wake up early despite feeling a bit sore. It was the best alibi that I could think of, and I was hoping that I would get an approval from the couple.
Before we went to sleep last night, we had two rounds. We did that every night, almost like a ritual for us. Sometimes, even in the morning, my husband would do that to me. That was why my body hurt when I went to school yesterday. I couldn’t walk properly, so I forced myself to wake up early so that my husband wouldn’t disturb me.
“What’s bothering about that, dear? You two are married. It’s his obligation to take care of you and provide everything you need.” Mrs. Robinson said.
I smiled wryly. Claude knew a different kind of care. He took care of me in a way that many people might consider right. However, it came with emotional pain. If he was just lifting me, it would turn out brutally romantic.
“It’s okay with me if he doesn’t take me. I don’t want to trouble him by driving me off to school, ma’am”
“What’s the matter? He’ll pass by your school anyway. And stop calling me ma’am. Just call me mom or Lavinia instead. You’re already my son’s wife. You’re not a stranger to me, to us.” Lavinia replied.
I was about to respond, but I noticed Claude approaching the dining table. So, I just nodded.
“What are you talking about? Is it about me?” Claude asked as he sat down.
“Your wife is asking if Ford can just take her to school. I told her it should be you since you’re married. That’s your obligation to her, son,” Lavinia replied.
“Is Sia bothering you, Claude?” Donovan asked.
Claude didn’t immediately answer. He glanced at me and then at his parents. “No. Not at all. I’m willing to take her to and from school every day. That’s not a problem for me. What did Sia say to you?”
I grimaced. Why did my request earlier return back to me? D*mn! I’m now in trouble. I was already imagining myself being roasted by him in the car.
“She said she’s embarrassed to ask you to take her to school because she might be bothering you,” Donovan replied.
Claude sighed. “She’s not bothering me. Maybe she’s just making excuses. She probably just doesn’t want me to take her. Maybe she’s hiding something at school that she doesn’t want me to see.”
My eyes widened. I wasn’t hiding anything. If Claude was referring to Garet, we broke up a long time ago. I didn’t even bother acknowledging him or talking to him even though we were classmates. So, I didn’t expect him to approach me the other day. If I didn’t know that my husband was forced to marry me, I would think he was jealous.
But I was not fool not to see that it wasn’t jealousy. He owned me, and that was exactly how he protects all his possessions. It was also one of his many ways to upset me, so that I would keep on regretting the fact that I agreed to marry him.
“I’m not hiding anything.” I said.
“If you’re not hiding anything, let me take you to and from school,” Claude insisted.
“Fine,” I reluctantly agreed.
After we finished eating, we left the house together.
“What are you thinking, wanting to be driven by Ford?” Referring to one of the drivers of the Robinsons. “Are you avoiding me? Don’t you want me to find out what mischief you’re up to at school?” Claude asked as he was driving.
He was not yet over with all his accusations about me and Garet, and no matter how I tried to convince him that Garet and I were done a long time ago, he believed otherwise.
“I’m not doing anything wrong. Why would you even think that?” I asked irritably.
“Are you really not? Then what did I see the other day? Why was there a guy hanging around you, huh? Doesn’t he know you’re already married?”
I swallowed hard. “I didn’t tell anyone that I’m already married. I don’t want people talking about us. Besides, our marriage won’t last long anyway. Why do we need to advertise to the public that we’re married if we’re just going to separate?”
Claude remained silent. But I saw him grip and pound the steering wheel. I instinctively squeezed myself against the window of the car.
Claude was seething with anger now. He would probably vent his anger at me later. I just stayed quiet and prayed that I would reach school before his anger exploded. I might really end up getting slapped, punched, or kicked by my husband.
“Thanks,” I said as Claude stopped the car in front of the school gate.
I immediately opened the door on my side. I didn’t wait for my husband to let me out. I just got out and walked inside. I didn’t even look back. But I heard the loud revving of the car. I just sighed as I walked.
“Hey, girl! That car is fancy! Who dropped you off? Is he your new boyfriend?” Maven asked as she greeted me.
I still had no plans of telling anyone about Claude, and I felt like our marriage had to be kept. I just felt like I did not want to explain myself to anyone and answer questions about this very personal matter.
“Ah, no! He’s just a friend of my dad. He dropped me off here at school,” I explained. I didn’t want to tell the truth because it might start gossip in
“Oh, really? Where’s your car then?”
I explained to her that my car was being repaired. I was trying to change the course of our conversation, and asked her about the reasons behind her absences in our classes for a significant number of days.
Maven heaved a deep sigh. “There’s a problem at home. I couldn’t concentrate on my studies so I took a break.”
The serious look on her face worried me, and even though I was also trying so hard to keep up with my personal problems, I knew that I needed to offer her a hand.
Maven shook her head vehemently. “Just leave it. Whatever I do, it turns out the same.”
I suddenly became even curious about what was going on with her. She was not the secretive type, and if it was something to keep by herself, I knew it was something serious. I insisted that I wanted to help her.
Maven held my hand. “It’s something personal, just between us, okay?”
I nodded. I looked closely at her eye as if telling her that she could trust me as much as I trust her.
Maven pulled me to the side, looked around, then leaned in closer to whisper in my ear.
“I’m getting married next week,” Maven whispered.
My eyes widened. “Really?”
“One hundred percent,” Maven replied.
I wish I could tell her right then and there that I actually just got married a few days ago. It could probably make her feel better. But just as I thought, my marriage was something I could not brag about to anyone. I didn’t even find it helpful to lessen the weight of her worry to actually share about my misfortune with her.
“Who’s the guy?” I asked curiously. Like me, my friend didn’t have a boyfriend.
“The son of Papa’s business partner. It turns out our parents have arranged for us to be together for a long time. That’s why Mama and Papa didn’t want me to have a boyfriend. Because they already chose a guy for me.”
Sh*t! I thought it was her who actually needed to hear about the recent turn of events in my life. But honestly, it was a sort of news I didn’t expect I needed. However, the reality that she would probably be facing the same fate as I had, hit me.
“Have you met that guy?” I asked her while I was setting aside all the arguments inside my mind.
“We were introduced to each other the other day. He’s handsome, tall, and has a good physique. I already have a crush on him, but the problem is he doesn’t like me. He outright rejected me to my face. Imagine, he even said that he would die before he’d marry me. It hurts so much, girl. I sulked for two days because of what he said.”
Those words reminded me of the very instance that I met Claude at his father’s office. The sarcasms that almost stripped me off of my self-esteem, and the belittling that almost caused my confidence about myself.
I hugged her. “Just let it go. You shouldn’t force yourself if he really doesn’t like you.”
“That’s the problem, though. The wedding is still going to happen even if he doesn’t like me. So, my problem now is, how do I deal with him if he’s angry and doesn’t want anything to do with me?”
I massaged my forehead. Maven and I were in exactly the same predicament. If the guy that she was getting married to was as tough as my husband, she would definitely go through hell as well.
“At least you have a crush on the guy. What if you don’t like the person you’re going to marry? That’s even harder, isn’t it?”
Maven just nodded. I knew that no matter how I tried to gaslight her situation, nothing would change the fact that she was about to get into something I was already trying to get out from.
I pondered as we walked towards our classroom. Maven at least had feelings for the man she would marry, while I felt nothing for Claude.
I shook my head. I thought of all sorts of things. But if ever I did start liking Claude, I hoped he’d like me back. I knew how painful it is to love without receiving love in return.
I remembered my sister. How was Lia doing now? I hoped she was okay. I hoped Mr. Martin wasn’t hurting her. If I could, I’d visit her and support her in the trouble she was in. But I also had my own problems to face. Everything just felt heavy inside me as everything went by so fast that there I was, trying to keep my head above the water.
After a whole afternoon of classes, Maven went home early because someone picked her up. I was left waiting by the gate again. I didn’t want to talk to anyone, so I focused on my phone. I didn’t realize the time. When I looked at my watch, it was already half-past six. Claude should be arriving soon.
I continued reading on my phone. I paused when it was already seven in the evening. But Claude still hadn’t arrived. Only a few students remained waiting by the gate. After a while, we left too. I was left waiting alone. It was past seven already. My ride still hadn’t come. When it was already seven-thirty, the guard approached me and asked if I was waiting for someone. He advised me to call my ride because it was already late. I wanted to call Claude, but I didn’t know his number. I decided to call Lavinia instead. But there was no answer on her cellphone. I could only hear the ringing tone. I tried calling three times, but no one answered.
After more than ten minutes, my phone suddenly rang. I didn’t recognize the number on the screen, so I didn’t answer immediately. But when the number called again, I was forced to pick up.
“Hello!”
“What’s up, Sia? I’ve been calling you for a while now. Why aren’t you answering?”
“Claude?”
“Listen carefully. I can’t pick you up right now. I have something to attend to. Just take a taxi home.”
I was about to respond when I heard a woman’s voice in the background. It seemed like Claude was with someone else.
“Claude, let’s go. They’re waiting for us.”
I covered my mouth upon hearing the voice of another woman. Was Claude busy with another woman that he couldn’t pick me up?
“Okay, I’ll go. I still have something important to attend to,” Claude said before ending the call.
I weakly put my phone down, thinking Claude almost forgot about me because he was busy with someone else. I thought he was occupied with work, but it turned out that he was attending to another woman.
I took a deep breath before opening the cab app on my mobile phone so I could book a ride. Had I known that Claude wouldn’t pick me up, I would have done it earlier. I waited for nothing. That man could be so heartless. He should have called me earlier. Didn’t he even worry about me? Did he forget that I had been waiting for him since earlier?
I realized that I was expecting too much from him already, neither of us want this marriage, and there I was feeling bad about him not being around, and feeling bad about the thought that he was with someone else.
He really didn’t care about me, not even a little. I was thinking of letting her mom know about it, but I was sure that this action would just boomerang on me once Claude’s parents confronted him about it.
It’s so irritating. It’s disappointing. Despite my efforts, I meant nothing to him. He was so good at making me feel those ways. I would not deny it, I was feeling a little hopeful that he could probably reward me, with even the tiniest care that he could, for doing everything that he asked me of.
All that I could do is vent my anger on my mind while waiting for the cab to arrive.