CHAPTER 106
ROBERT’S POV
Last night was hell. I couldn’t sleep. I kept thinking about Lily. Where was she? In her house or somewhere else? What was she doing? Who was she with? Will she ever forgive me and take me to see my kids so we can become a family? These questions daggered my mind throughout the night. I had to pass the time by drinking, eating leftover pizza and watching TV.
I wondered if she was thinking about me too. Surely, she wasn’t. She hated me too much now to even care whether I existed or not. If I’m ever going to regain her trust and forgiveness and win her back then I had to put in a lot of effort. I’ll have to go the extra mile and do things the old me will never think of doing. I had to take gentle steps, give her the time and space she needed and prove to her I was a changed man who was ready to love her till the end of days.
After I paid that security guard and promised to pay him more if he continued to give me all the information I needed, he spilt all the details I needed to know about Lily’s new life like a fountain. He told me the time she arrived and left for work, her house address, her relationship with that man Noah which I was most interested in and other important details. But he didn’t mention anything about the kids. I didn’t expect him to know though because he was just a security guard. He’ll know very little about Lily’s life outside the office.
Not so far from Lily’s company was another building with an unoccupied room on the topmost floor that offered the perfect view of Lily’s office. Her company’s transparent glass exterior made it easy to see what they were doing inside as long as one was close enough. I bought that room and installed a piece of advanced surveillance equipment that was capable of seeing through even tinted or frosted glass. Buying that room and this surveillance equipment cost a fortune but it was worth it. Lily was worth more than anything else in my life right now.
I was prepared to spy on her and track every move she made even if it took me all day long. Not that I was a deranged psycho who liked stalking women but I needed answers. I wanted to quench this undying curiosity. I wanted to understand the woman my ex-wife had become and know everything about the new life she was living now. Most importantly, she would lead me to my kids.
The security guard said she arrived at work latest 9 am. Typical Lily. Always hardworking and dedicated to her work. She made the best secretary and personal assistant. I just wasn’t attentive enough to notice and acknowledge her efforts.
I arrived at the building before 9 am so Lily wouldn’t by any chance cross paths with me. I sat down in front of the surveillance equipment with a bag of chips and a bottle of beer, ready to start viewing. I was waiting for Lily to arrive.
As I waited for her, I decided to message Martin and let him know I had found her. I should have done it yesterday when I confirmed she lived in this city, but forgot along the line because of my endless sprouts of wrecking thoughts.
“Martin, I found Lily. You can stop worrying your ass off. Tell Mom and Dad so they can stop looking.” I finished, greedily stuffing a handful of chips into my mouth and staring at the phone, awaiting his response.
“Really?” I could almost feel his happiness radiating from where I was.
“Yh,” I typed.
Briefly, I looked into the surveillance equipment to check if Lily had arrived but let out a heavy sigh on seeing she hadn’t. It was already 8:35 am and she still wasn’t there. I know the security guard said 9 latest but what could be keeping her? I was already growing restless and bored in this empty room. I needed to see her. Even if it’s just for a minute.
I had to get a grip and sit through this. Maybe she was taking the kids to school. I imagined how cute and smart they’d look in their school uniforms. But at the same time, I couldn’t fathom how Lily managed to shoulder all the responsibilities of raising them alone. It was unbelievable. She truly was a super mom.
It was freaking hard for me to believe I had told her to get rid of the kids when she was pregnant with them nine years ago. How could I have wanted that for my children? My flesh and blood. Each time I remember my words that day, I feel this sharp pain in my heart, like someone striking it with a metal spike. It made me feel I was unworthy to search for them. Unworthy to call them mine. Unworthy to stand before them and tell them I’m their father who they hadn’t seen in almost a decade.
My phone beeped, snapping me out of my thoughts. I almost forgot I was still chatting with Martin.
“How did you manage to find her?” He asked.
“It’s a long story. I’ll tell you guys everything once I get back. Just know that I have found her and I’m not letting her out of my sight.”
“Ok,” even from where I was, I felt this news lift a lead weight off his chest. “When are you bringing her back?” He asked and for a moment, it sounded like he was saying ‘When are you bringing her back to me?’
I kept quiet, staring into space. I tried to keep myself from getting angry. Martin, although my half-brother, I saw him as a full brother and a best friend who has had my back on several occasions. But if his overbearing or rather obsessive attitude towards Lily continued, I wouldn’t tolerate it anymore. Once Lily and my kids get back with me, we are packing out of the family mansion and getting our own place like I wanted.
“???” His messages flooded the screen with question marks, seeing I was taking too long to answer him.
“I don’t really know. She’s still angry at me, at all of us and isn’t making it easy for me so it might take a while before I can fix everything and we can come back.”
I didn’t know why, but I had faith Lily would forgive me and take me back. It wasn’t cockiness. I just have a gut feeling she still has feelings for me. It was buried deep inside her, almost smothered by all the hatred and rage she felt toward me, but it was there. So tiny. Barely perceptible. It’s left for me to nurture it back to life.
“Ok.” Martin typed.
After some time of contemplating, I typed “Martin.”
“I’m here bro. What’s up? If you need my help with anything just mention and I’ll do it in a flash.”
I guess it’s time to finally address this issue. I needed him to know that Lily was mine and mine alone. I didn’t want him crossing into a territory that wasn’t his because if he did, then I might just lose it and do something I’d regret.
“I don’t need your help with anything, Martin. I just need you to listen.” I typed, overcoming hesitation. “Even though we might not come from the same mother, we’re one blood, one flesh. We’re bros for life. We are family. But that doesn’t mean you can overstep boundaries or act like you have a claim to her. I married her. Not you, so quit it with this overbearing attitude of yours towards her. Once I get back with her, I don’t want you being anything more than a brother-in-law to her, for peace to reign. I hope you understand.
He didn’t reply. It was as if I had dropped a bomb on him. Even though we were chatting on the phone, I could sense the thick tension looming between us. I hoped he hadn’t taken offence in what I said. I didn’t want to create enmity with my brother. But at the same time, I didn’t care because I was well within my rights.
“Martin??” I typed again. The message showed he saw it but he still didn’t reply. Though I was trying to contain it, I couldn’t any more. I was starting to get angry at him. However he might try to escape this, but he can’t. One way or the other, he’ll give me the answer I needed and stay for the fuck away from Lily if he wishes for us to keep being brothers.
As I waited for him to return my chats, I peeped into the surveillance equipment. On seeing Lily had arrived and was already seated at her table, working on her laptop, everything else I was doing became history in the blink of an eye. I swept off the potato chips and beer from the tabletop, making a mess. My phone nearly fell too. But I didn’t care as I adjusted the equipment and began to watch Lily.