NERTHUS
Feeling the urge to pant for air, I squirm in my seat.
The little voice in my head is screaming how I should recognize that this isn’t about work. He can’t say such things or do certain gestures if he wasn’t into me on an entirely other basis.
But I drown it in my doubt immediately, shutting it up.
And I surely have enough material to do it, as he had treated me badly enough to never get her to re-emerge to gasp for air.
Clearing my throat, I fight hard to keep my voice from trembling as I try to get the conversation going in another direction.
And without those breathtaking words of his.
“What about me falling for you and you threatening to drop me?”
“I’m sorry if I acted like this. But you have to know that this is all new to me as well.” He shakes his head, capturing my gaze with his intense one.
“I was just doing my job,” I whisper, and he smirks.
Lowering his voice as well, he leans in even more. “But you liked being with me, didn’t you? You had feelings for me.”
Had…
“You wish!” I squint my eyes at him, and it’s not even a lie.
Because there is no past tense here.
“I know, I’ve been a total asshole, and I’m sorry I acted like an idiot. I’m sorry about how I treated you. I just want you back because this isn’t working, and even if you say we were toxic, it’s not true that we weren’t good for each other. I have never felt this miserable!”
My heart squeezes painfully in my chest as he takes my breath away, impeding me from speaking.
“If it’s true that your body, soul, and heart belong to me, I want to have it!”
Burning under his intense gaze, I wet my lips with my tongue before I bite on my bottom lip.
Don’t fall for it. Don’t fall for it. Don’t fall for it.
“I don’t know. I felt awful as you treated me like a bitch that needed to be trained.” My nails bury into the thick fabric of his coat as I clasp it as if it were an anchor.
“You don’t need any training. You’ll be allowed to do anything you like to do. And you don’t have to act otherwise like you did before we went to that stupid poker night. We were perfect back then, maybe we can go back to that?” He turns towards me slightly, grabbing my arm. “I was a moron, and I was scared about the fact that you actually made me feel good. I won’t make the same mistake again.”
Tilting his head, he caresses my arm with his thumb. “I promise.”
As my brain goes into overdrive, I try taking small breaths to stabilize myself. I feel like fainting as I finally have collected back enough air to speak.
“What about Jensen?” I ask him, my voice breaking at the realization that I will always have to cower for the people around him.
He laughs shortly before he notices that my expression hasn’t changed. He realizes that I wasn’t joking and clears his throat as he shifts in his seat. “I told you that he won’t be any problem. I thought that I had been clear about this.”
“Oh my God,” I say as I feel my stomach turning. “I thought you were talking figuratively.”
Clicking his tongue, he grazes his lip with his thumb. “I didn’t. He is gone, Nerthus.”
Gasping for air, I let my gaze wander over the other tables with people chatting leisurely while enjoying their time in the dark and cold. I turn back to look at him, finding him watching me patiently.
And even if exhaustion is showing on his face, he looks breathtaking.
“Can I think about it?” I ask feebly, nearly not recognizing my own voice.
He smiles, his gaze dropping to the floor for a second. “Sure…”
Scooting closer to him, I loosen the grip around myself and grab onto the sides of his shirt.
He must feel cold as well.
“But come home with me tonight, will you?”
Chuckling, he comes closer and nods.
His lips are nearly touching mine as we jump interrupted by a groan.
“Oh, noooo! I’m sorry!”
We look at Danny simultaneously, who fidgets nervously with a little plush toy in his hands. “They said they would close in a bit, so they sent me away.”
“Okay,” Arawn groans, getting up. “Let’s start going then.”
I jerk back, surprised as I look up at him. “Really? That’s it?”
He lifts an eyebrow at me as I mimic his deep voice. “No ‘they are closing when I tell them to!’?”
“No waaay.” Danny cracks up while Arawn just turns to walk away.
Shrugging with a grin, I get up and, taking my big panda bear into one arm, I lay my other around Danny’s shoulders. “Let’s get home.”
“Can we have a sleepover?” He asks, and I squeeze his arm.
Arawn growls, without even turning around. “You had enough fun. I’m bringing you home.”
“Oh, but I didn’t have any cotton candy!” I say disappointed, and he groans.
“Okay, let’s get you some, and we can take a walk on the pier until we can finally go home.”
Danny, and I rejoice, jumping on our spot.
After we get our cotton candy, we leave the amusement park to take a walk on the nearly deserted pier. As we walk out munching on our cotton candy silently, I watch a few fishermen on the job.
“So, what do you think?” Danny asks with sparkling eyes, tearing me out of my thoughts.
Gulping down my cotton candy, I smile at him. “Ah, it was so nice. But it’s too cold.”
“Yeah,” he laughs, twirling his finger into his puffy candy. “I think it’s the first time they kicked off a winter season, right Arawn?”
“Dumbest idea ever,” Arawn grumbles, making us snicker.
“No, it was destiny! Otherwise, Amber would have had to wait endlessly to see it in the summer.” He grins at me, and I loop my arm in his.
“You are so cute, Danny boy. But let’s visit in the summer. Must be really nice.”
Danny beams at me. “Yeah, let’s do this!”
“Oh,” he says as he stops, showing me the plush toy, he was holding all this time. “I got you this.”
I gasp as I take it, and he smiles. “It is not as big as the one Arawn won for you, but I’m still training. In the summer I will definitely manage to win a bigger one for you.”
“No, Danny! This is perfect. I totally love it. Thank you so much.” I’m about to shed happy tears as I hug him close.
Letting go of a happily grinning Danny, I look at the little penguin wearing a small Santa hat. “It is so cute.”
“Stop overwhelming her, Danny.” Arawn growls annoyed, lighting another cigarette.
I tsks, lying my arm around his frame, hugging him closer to my side. “Don’t mind him. He is just jealous.”
Danny chuckles cutely while Arawn simply ignores me.