NERTHUS
If he is going to come for me, I better be prepared.
And with that, I don’t mean fuckwise but especially for the talk he is going to want with me.
I don’t know what it’s going to be about, but I certainly want my heart to be ready for everything.
In particular, I have to make up my mind about if I want to go back to work for him, as I don’t seem to be able to detach myself from him anyway.
So, at least I’ll be getting my money.
My last shift of the week in the cafe is surely going better than the others before. Even if my thoughts keep going back to my call with Arawn last night, as I had my first video phone sex ever. I find myself smiling repeatedly at how I had him assure me several times that he wasn’t recording it, even if I could see in his smirk that he wasn’t being honest.
But by God, he was way too gorgeous to have me refuse him this joy.
“You seem in a good mood today. I’m glad to see you smiling like that.” Lizzy says as she is counting out the cash in the register.
I walk back from closing the door, wiping my hands on my jeans. “I bet you are. This happy bitch didn’t break any of your cute little cups today.”
She laughs while tying dollar bills with an elastic. “You were a lot less clumsy, that’s right. Did something good happen?”
“Erm… something like that, yeah.” I clear my throat as I continue to rearrange the pillows and the lounge seats.
Bringing another tray with dirty dishes to the counter, I do my best not to fall over my feet. “I have kind of a massive crush on a guy that is totally off-limits. And we keep playing cat and mouse while having some sort of friendship with benefits. Actually, it’s just the benefits, seeing how we fight. But yeah…”
Putting a strand of my hair behind my ear, I’m happy about knowing that my phone is locked in another room. “Ah, I must seem like a lovesick teenage girl to you.”
“Are you kidding me? You are so cute. Don’t worry about that.” Lizzy seems concentrated on the bills, but her words don’t quite match her expression. “And I don’t know him. But if he is off limits to you, then he is an Idiot.”
I laugh, and she lifts her gaze to me. “I mean, no one could save him at this point.”
“You are just too nice. But if you saw him…” Grimacing, I deliver a few more cups onto the counter.
“Is it the cutie patootie I saw you flirting with last time?” She asks, and I shake my head.
Starting to wash the dishes, I sigh. “No, he was the good guy that would have been my way out of this mess. But it wasn’t meant to be.”
“Sorry about that.” She says commiseratively, causing me to move my hand dismissively.
“What about you?” I ask, apparently taking her unprepared.
“Huh?”
“Do you have a crush?” I giggle, putting the cups back onto the shelves. “Or maybe you are just not unlucky like me, and you can actually hold up a decent relationship.”
She nods repeatedly, her gaze back low. “Yeah, yeah. I’m one of the lucky ones. I have had a girlfriend for a bit, actually. We have been together for forever.”
“Aaaw, that’s amazing,” I say, finishing cleaning up the sink with a rag. “How did you meet?”
“Ah, it’s a long story and I don’t want to bore you.”
I would like to ask more and tell her that I do not mind hearing a cute, boring story, but something in her tone has me refrain from it.
“Okay.” I smile at her as I turn towards her.
An awkward silence descends on us as I wait for her to finish before we go to the locker room together.
I try to regain a leisurely chat with her, but she isn’t as responsive anymore.
Starting to guess that she might be having relationship problems with her girlfriend, and I now opened a fresh wound, I keep quiet.
But with me, that is not really an option for a long time.
“Oh, this is beautiful.” I’m about to touch the necklace pendant that fell on her back as she turns around panicky. “Is that a K?”
She plays with the pendant between her fingers as she looks lost. “Yeah. It is my girlfriend’s initial.”
“That’s cute,” I say, making her smile. “Is she a Kristine?”
Laughing, she turns back around and pulls her pullover over the white top she is wearing. “Kimberly.”
“Aw,” I sigh, taking out my clothes from my locker. “I wish I had someone wearing my initials as well.”
She snickers but doesn’t say anything to it, so I let it slip once again.
After successfully managing to be quiet for another set of minutes, I finally say goodbye to her and leave the cafe.
I refrain from hugging her this time as I feel a bit guilty for saddening her mood.
As I have changed my shift with other barkeepers at the bar who gladly took it as they needed the extra hours, I go straight to taking the metro.
Arriving in my old neighborhood, I close my coat further up. I shake myself as if wanting to shake off the bad feeling creeping up my legs.
With fast steps, I get out of the subway station and reemerge on Hunts Point Avenue.
Ignoring men catcalling me while sitting on the steps of the houses, I increase my pace. I reach a small park without any lighting, and passing a few quarreling teenagers, I descend a set of stairs before I turn the corner.
Arriving at a grotty and stinky passage, I slow down my step as I near a dark figure.
“I don’t like to wait, Nerthus, dear.” A honeyed voice screeches through the tunnel, disrupting the steady glugging of the water passing next to the small walkway I’m standing on.
“I’m sorry, Mike. But I clocked out late, and my commute was longer than I remembered.”
Michelangelo laughs as he takes a step forward, holding out a brown bag towards me.
His creepy smile is missing several teeth, and even if he is dressed like a homeless person and has dirt smeared all over his face, I’m quite sure that this is just an act to hide his identity.
No man with this intelligence and those skills would need to live on the streets.
Especially if I see what only I pay him, and I’m certainly not his only client.
“Is that thing for the same men that came to assure themselves about my skills a few weeks ago?” He asks as I check the contents of the bag and pass him a roll of thousands.
“I don’t know what you are talking about, Mike. I’m just trying to get around minding my own business.”
His creepy laugh confirms to me once more that his appearance is totally faked as his voice seems more mechanical than human. “Well, my dear Goddess of love. Take care.”
“It’s not the Godde-” I look up, seeing that he is already gone. I breathe out, finishing my sentence in a whisper. “Not the Goddess of love.”
Who is he? Batman?
“Thank you, Mike!” I shout into the tunnel, my voice echoing from the walls. But more than the burble of the water, nothing else reaches my ears in response.
I climb out of the dirty passage with a deep sigh and after putting my newly bought gadget into the inside of my coat.
Hugging it close, I start walking back to the subway station. The quarreling voices have stopped, and I guess this is because of the few men standing around in small groups.
As I pass them with fast steps, I can hear them talk in a language I do not understand.
I’m surprised to find the groups of three to four men casually distributed along my way back. They are too far away from each other to seem to belong together but still too close to be able to see what the others do.
Or to notice if they need help.
Shaking my head, I take the last few steps down to the subway station, finding myself running.
Just as I reach the station and wait for the subway to roll in I realize…
Nobody catcalled me this time.
Not once.
I steady my hectic breathing by taking small breaths as I notice two bulky men with long coats standing next to me. And again, they are too far away to be with me but still too close to be able to catch me should I make a run for it. Being afraid of turning around to look at them, I keep my gaze forcefully forward.
The next train should arrive in just a few minutes, but the seconds just pass seeming hours.
Fuck it.
Taking out my phone, I dial the only number I can think of.