NERTHUS
“You were living in Hunts Point! The catacombs should be merely disturbing for you. What’s wrong?”
The catacombs… Now I get it. The place where the rich kids get to mingle with the underworld, getting everything they desire for hard cash.
I breathe out distraught. “How do you know about Hunts Point?”
As it hits me like lightning, I close my eyes. “Ah, right. I told Danny.”
“Sit back down, Nerthus.”
My feet need another push before I get them to move towards Arawn, instead of bursting out of the room like my head is screaming for me to do.
But honestly, how far would I make it?
I shudder as I sit back down next to Arawn, who is now grinning at me.
“Were you thinking about how far you could get before I’d catch you?”
I laugh awkwardly as I put one leg beneath me to turn to him fully. “Maybe…”
“Don’t do that. It would just fuel my lust, and I need you to be able to walk tomorrow.” He leans in, making my breath hitch in my throat.
“Why? What’s tomorrow?”
“Stop it with the questions and answer mine.”
Crossing my arms, I create a little distance. “I worked the streets… What would you think?”
“You are an addict?” His disparaging tone has my blood freezing.
“Ex! Ex-addict!” I try to say calmly, but he doesn’t seem to take it so easily.
“Once an addict, always an addict!”
My chest contracts painfully as his voice filled with rage reaches my ears. I was always proud of how I got away from the stuff and managed to stay clean. Achieving to get my shit back together was the only thing in my life I did right.
“That is something highly unfair to say!” I gulp as his face remains unmoved. “And hurting.”
Glaring at me in disgust and anger. “As if I’d give a fuck.”
“This isn’t something extraordinary for our world. You deal with it yourself!”
“I’m not a dealer, Nerthus.”
“You clarified that already.” I scoff and gasp as he pulls me closer, making me untangle my arms.
“And I don’t mingle with addicts.” He growls.
Gulping, my eyes drop to his lips. “I’m sure Bernie has something else to say about this.”
“I don’t plan on fucking Bernie, Nerthus!”
I force a smile, trying to overcome the unsettling feeling in my chest. Rising my gaze back to his, I ask lowly, “So, what? Would you punish me for it?”
His glare remains unmoved, as he unclenches his jaw to speak. “No!”
I look at him questioningly, and he raises his hand, the folded contract between his fingers. “I would get rid of you. Instantly.”
As my head snaps back to look at him, he is examining the paper in his hand. “This would be burnt immediately.”
I lower my eyes feeling crushed. A few weeks ago, I would have told him that he could shove his way of behaving together with that stupid piece of paper up his arse before walking out of the room. But in this little time that we spent together, he seems to have become my new drug of choice. And I know him already well enough to recognize that he is genuinely troubled by that topic. So, I decide to play the good girl.
“Wait! No!” He tilts his head, as he looks back at me.
“Come again?”
“You can’t… Look at me.” My voice breaks as I fail to keep my panic in check. “Look at my skin, my eyes, my arms. There is no way I could hide that from you, don’t you think?”
His gaze wanders down to my neck and I shiver pleasantly. “You would see if I lied, right?”
I know that I have to calm down, but my heart keeps pumping my blood through my veins just faster. Risking collapsing during the minutes that he seems to ponder on something, I clench his shirt.
“Arawn… I’ve already been clean for years. I wouldn’t even flinch if there were people in here with us doing drugs. I would feel uncomfortable, but not more.”
“Why did you freak out then?”
“It’s because I was sitting in it. It just triggered bad memories. Nothing to worry about.”
He scans my face, his eyes holding so much disgust.
“Come on. You are too obsessed with me to just let me go like this. What about your sleeping schedule?” I tease him, caressing his chest, but he doesn’t take any of it.
Without saying anything, he takes out his lighter and holds its flame under the papers that we just signed.
I scream, snatching the papers out of his hold to save them. “No!”
As I’m checking them for any damage, I feel him grabbing my chin to lift my gaze back to his. “This is not a game I’m going to play, Nerthus.”
“You have to stop being so mean to me. I don’t do any more drugs. I took my last dose about 6 years ago and I never touched it ever again.”
“How does a low whore even get to afford such things? I guess you hadn’t this kind of money you make today back then.”
“Of course not.” I scoff, “But this isn’t a reason for you to be so condescending. There are other ways of payment for women like me.”
He groans, his expression darkening. “You fucked your dealer for it?”
“Oh, come on! You are a part of this world as well. This is nothing new.”
The look he graces me with is burning right into my soul, paining me in a way I never felt.
“My old pimp already got me on the stuff before I got to New York. So, as I got more clients, I needed more stuff. But the more stuff I needed, the more clients I had to take to be able to afford it. And the more clients I took, the more stuff I needed to be able to handle it. It wasn’t like I needed it to party like the rich kids in those other rooms.”
I swallow a sob, not wanting to look weak. “You have no right to judge me if you are on top of this scheme! It must be so wonderful as a royal, looking down on us plebeians. How much would you care if a girl, like I was, would come forward telling you what is going on?”
“I probably wouldn’t care.” He says coldly, clenching his jaw.
“See!” Trying to distance myself from him again, I press the papers onto his chest as I scoot away slightly. “So, if you want to, burn this. Let me go back to my old job.”
I gulp, as he lays his hand on mine. “And never contact me again.”
“Do you even know what you are rejecting?!” He says, growling lowly.
“I don’t care, Arawn! I don’t need your money, and I don’t need your contacts or power whatsoever.” I straighten my spine, wanting to appear unbothered while my heart is breaking.
“What triggered you?”
“Don’t change the subject. Don’t ask more about me. Just get over it or let me go!”
As his hand shoots up into my hair to pull my head back, my pulse skyrockets. I feel his teeth graze my exposed throat, and I gulp. Fear should already have taken my body hostage, but I can’t seem to feel anything other than panic for him to pronounce the words that would have me leave his life forever.
“I’m not going to ask you again, Nerthus.”
Blinking quickly, I free my eyes from the prickling tears while I clench his shirt tighter.
“Arawn…” I whisper, fighting back a moan as he bites into my skin.
“Did you like fucking him?”
“No.” I answer lowly, “What a stupid question.”
His deep chuckle rumbles through me as his lips connect with my skin. “What made you go back to him then?”
I groan and feel him tug at my hair again. “I hadn’t got any money. He was living in the same building as me. It was… convenient.”
Wetting my lips, I add in a whisper, “I was high most of the time anyway.”
“So, what triggered you?”
Taking a deep breath, I push out my answer shakily. “I didn’t just fuck with my dealer. He liked to watch… Are you sure you want to know?”
“Stop talking around it, woman.” He barks, and I move my hand up to his wrist, in the hope of reducing his grip slightly.
“Oh, well. I warned you. In return for my services, he would give me some of his stuff for free. But he loved it when I was high with him.”
“What kind of stuff?” He asks and bites into my jawline softly.
“Coke, mostly. But also pills, sometimes. Uppers and downers. Sick shit.”
“And so?” His voice mirrors his impatience, and I squirm in his hold.
“Nothing. He was a little freak that loved to watch me masturbate.” I chuckle bitterly, “He would distribute the dose he wanted me to take on a chair, and I would sit in it.”
I lower my voice, enjoying his lips still glued to me. “I would give him a little show and would touch myself while I would get higher and higher.”
“The fuck?!” He growls lowly, letting go of me. I lower my head to look at him while I shift onto my knees.
“Don’t tell me this got my righteous big boy aroused?!”
He clicks his tongue, even if his eyes tell me that he would love to devour me. “Don’t be silly.” He snarls, and I watch him, wanting to touch his lips.
“Don’t lie to me! I’m not allowed either.” I say as I lower myself to sit on my heels.
Before he can move away from me, I lay my hand on his bulge, and moan teasingly. “Want to tell me how you would like to do the same to me?”
Rage flashes in his eyes before he moves too fast for me to realize. As he has me pinned down, his angry look would worry me if he wasn’t pressing his hard cock against my throbbing pussy.
“Not with drugs.” He says huskily, leaning in even more. “But fuck, I want a little show as well.”
I gasp as he bites into my neck, clearly leaving a hickey. “No, what are you doing?”
He kisses the spot on my neck softly before he whispers huskily. “What? Are you worried that anyone could see it?”
Gulping and turning my head to the side, I shake it slowly. “No, of course not. I’m prohibited from dating, remember?!”
“Of course.” I feel his smirk against my skin. “As long as you keep clean.”
Nodding shyly, I inhale sharply as he moves his hand up my leg, pressing into me even more.
“And Nerthus?”
“Huh?” I look up, my heart skipping a beat as I see his evil grin.
“Don’t leave in the morning before you get my permission!”
“Yes, boss,” I whisper, a smile creeping onto my lips.