“It is doing what is right even when no one is looking at you,” I replied simply, fighting back my tears. My heart is racing, and despite remembering Ismael, I try to relax.
I turned to see Mr. Roize, who is now looking at me carefully. It’s as if my appearance is being scrutinized. I tried to seem normal, as if nothing was bothering me. I need to concentrate. I’m in a job interview and don’t want to fail it. This company is my ambition; I should be serious.
“Miss Alvandra, come with me,” Sir Martin requested. I just saw that the interview is over because the other applicants have left. Does this imply that I am the only one who passed? How did this happen? I thought the others would do better than me.
“This is the second phase of the screening. You may begin your written exam in that room. I’m giving you thirty minutes to complete that test. Sir Martin added, “After you pass this exam, you will proceed to the final interview with Miss Levanier.” He then led me to a different room where I could do the second portion of the evaluation alone.
After thirty minutes, I had finished answering all of the exam questions. I’m just not convinced that the majority is correct. I hope that I will pass. I truly want to work for this LMC. Despite my resume having passed over to other companies, I don’t have a second option. I genuinely want this to be my first company after graduation and nothing else.
“Miss Alvandra!” Sir Martin yelled, prompting me to rise from the waiting room. I just waited around five minutes for the results, possibly because I was alone and they were quick. “Unfortunately, Miss Levanier won’t be here with us today to meet our CEO, so if you don’t mind, we will just call you.”
“Sure, sir,” I responded, smiling at him. He simply nodded and departed. My shoulders fell in response to the news. Is that a way of saying I failed?
I sighed deeply as I walked to the elevator. I guess having a large vocabulary does not ensure success on a job application. But at least I now know how to handle a job interview. It’s simply unfortunate that I didn’t pass the LMC. Well, that proves that not everything is so simple.
I tapped my shoulder to comfort myself. Jothea, this is not the end. You still have a long way to go. You are just getting started. There are plenty of other occupations available. Perhaps you can’t do LMC yet. It’s okay. You can also return to this location. You can still apply for a second chance next time.
I nodded and resolved to treat myself to ice cream later. I mean, I still deserved it.
I checked my money on my phone, and I still had food to buy to compensate for today’s failure. It is a failure, but it also serves as an opportunity to learn where I fall short. I should keep this mindset. It’s what it is.
When the elevator door opened, I stepped out, but I didn’t expect to run into anyone. I looked at the man. It was Mr. Roize. He seemed departed during the second portion of the screening because the CEO arrived, and everyone felt hesitant.
“I’m sorry, Mr. Roize!” I apologized, but he ignored it. Instead, he grabbed something off the floor-my cell phone.
“Here,” he said. “I’ll pay for it.” I almost fainted when I saw how much more broken my phone was. Even the LCD had a line. I tried pressing it, but it no longer works. How about my money?
I worried and glanced at Mr. Roize as he removed money from his wallet. I mean, my phone was already broken, but even if I had the money to repair it, I didn’t want to waste it because I could still use it. But now it is utterly broken. How am I supposed to fix this immediately?
“Is this enough?” he asked, handing me a thick bundle of cash. Tears welled in my eyes. Why is it so easy for him to discharge such large sums of money? “Are you going to accept this or not?”
I gave a gasp. How can I accept that in front of so many people? I’m sure many people witnessed what happened, and it would be a shame if I accepted payment from him.
“I don’t have a lot of time in this world, Miss Alvandra.” He grasped my hand and placed the money on it before boarding the elevator. I was left standing in the foyer as the personnel looked on.
In an instant, I felt like crying. Hearing someone call me ‘Miss Alvandra’ has a significant emotional impact on me. I feel trapped, no matter how hard I try to forget. Even if I attempt to be strong or pretend, it still exists within me. Just hiding. Just buried. That little twitch will flare up again.
Ismael, why have you done this to me? Why did you leave me like this?
I want to blame you. But where are you?
You are the reason I am currently having so many problems. If you hadn’t made me feel like I could rely on someone, I’d still be able to live alone.
I bit my bottom lip and fought back tears. I observed the individuals around me. They looked at me as if they were doubting my entire demeanour following our interaction with Mr. Roize.
When my classmates discovered that Ismael had only exploited me, they all looked at me the same way. They see me as trash. Someone who’s inappropriate to be in here. Someone who is not suitable for love. Not someone to adore.
I worked up the fortitude to leave that place. A car was suddenly parked outside. I also heard about the CEO of Loeisal Malmdan Company having arrived, but I was no longer interested. I’m no longer interested in meeting the person behind my dream company. Where else could this be for? I can’t go in there anymore. One other thing: I don’t want to be there anymore. I’ve changed my mind. I’m giving up on my dreams.
I continued to walk away, holding my smashed phone and the money from Mr. Roize.
*****
Many days have gone by, and I still can’t fix my phone. They claim it is completely broken and cannot be fixed anymore. Luckily, I reported it to the bank. They gave me a savings card, so I may still withdraw my remaining funds. Another positive aspect was the money Mr. Roize handed me. It seemed as if God had given me that money, because I used it to handle both my bank account and my employment applications to other firms.
I’m currently checking my emails on my laptop, hoping that one of the companies will ask me to a job interview, but as of now, I have none. Perhaps they prefer an applicant with a phone number they can reach promptly.
I was lying on the couch when my laptop rang unexpectedly. It’s a reminder. When I realized it was my birthday tomorrow, I started crying a little. April 9. I didn’t even recall. I was so preoccupied with finding a job and settling my difficulties that I didn’t notice it. I turn twenty-one tomorrow, and nothing is changing in my dull life. I can’t even drink or smoke since I don’t have enough money for it.
I sighed. I guess my birthday will pass as if it hadn’t occurred.
I closed my eyes and felt Mael beside me. He purrs as if to console me. I really want someone to sing for me on my birthday, but who would do that? This cat?
I eventually fell asleep.
*****
“We’re all merely passing through.
Doing what we can do for a lifetime.
We have more than one adventure to take.
More than one dream to make in our lifetime.”
I awoke as I felt someone caressing my hair. I slowly opened my eyes and realized I couldn’t breathe.
“Ismael?” I asked. He grinned at me and caressed my cheek. I was lying on his legs. Tears welled in my eyes. I cannot believe it. Here he is. Here’s Ismael. He is singing for me.
“As for me, there’s only one dream.
And that’s to love you, my love.
With a love to last a lifetime…”