“Oh God Jack… wow,” she said, looking down again. She was silent for a minute and time seemed to be standing still. Finally she began to speak in a nervous voice.
“Ever since I was a little girl I’ve been fascinated by scenes in movies of guys getting whipped,” she said slowly. “Like in Westerns… I mean, it started when I was really young and I didn’t understand the feeling it gave me… I would get these butterflies in my stomach, and later… it started to turn me on.”
“I’ve never figured out why it affects me like that,” she went on, “it’s not like I hate men or anything, it’s just… it’s just something about seeing a strong man tied up and helpless, and… being hurt. You must think I’m really sick… I don’t know what’s wrong with me.”
I took her chin in my hand and raised her head up to look at me and I saw her eyes were tearing up a little. I touched her face and said, “You’re no more sick than I am Karen, because I want that… I want to be whipped.”
“For real? You’d want me to do that?”
“Yes I would… I’m really turned on by whipping scenes too, and I always want to be the one tied up and getting it. Only by a woman though — I’m sure it’s something screwed up about how I relate to women. I think it’s also just wanting to give up control and be taken over… you know, escaping from everything else.”
“Jack, I don’t know,” she said, taking my hands again… “I’ve never actually whipped anyone but I’ve thought about it for so long… I don’t know why I have these thoughts, why it excites me… but it would be hard for me to hurt you.”
“You can try it with me Karen, and find out if you like doing it for real… but I have conditions.”
“Tell me your conditions.”
“That you start off going easy on me and do it harder gradually. And that you really mean it when you say it would excite you. That’s what it would all be about for me, feeling you hurting me and knowing it was turning you on.”
“Yes and yes to your conditions Jack. I’m so turned on about it right now. Of course I can go easy to start, but… how hard should it end up?”
“Oh… if you take it slow at first and let me get into subspace… you know that word?”
She nodded yes.
“You could end up doing it really hard… I mean, nothing that would break the skin, no permanent marks… but you could whip me pretty hard if you wanted to.”
“Oh God,” she said again. She looked at me with a faraway look in her eyes, and I knew she wanted to. What was I getting myself into?
“Karen,” I went on, “true confession… I went to a pro dominatrix once to see what a whipping felt like and I found… uh, I found out I could kind of enjoy pain. I got off being whipped on my ass and the tops of my thighs, close to the groin. I did some reading and I found out that’s because the nerves from those places run alongside nerves from the genitals, so the pain and pleasure get mixed.”
“Wow, you’ve done more homework than me,” she said with a smile. “And you went to see a pro? Did it cost a lot?”
“Yeah, but it wasn’t really that great because she was into that typical mean dominatrix role. She kept falling into that thing of insulting me, making fun of me like she hated me, and that turned me off.”
“Jack, you’re like, way ahead of me with this,” she said, taking my hands in hers again, “I feel like I’m going down a rabbit hole. I don’t know if I can do this, I think I want to try… but what if I get really into it and go too far? We should have a safe word in case it gets too crazy, I want to feel sure whatever I’m doing is okay, that you can stop me if you have to.”
“We can use the good old red means stop, yellow means keep doing what you’re doing but just dial it back some. Is that okay?”
“Yes… that’s okay.”
“Good, that means I can cry and beg for you to stop and you can ignore it unless you hear the safe word,” I said, smiling.
“Oh… that would be hot! Okay, you got it,” she said breathlessly, “but you really won’t think I’m too weird if I do this?”
“No Karen,” I told her, “as long as you don’t think I’m too weird for wanting you to.”
“Oh no Jack, I don’t at all. I just can’t believe we’re talking about this… I never thought I would actually do this, it’s going to feel so awkward… but you’ll help me go through with it? God, it sounds so weird me asking you to help me hurt you!”
“You really want to try it though, right?”
“I think so… I do if you do.”
“And you really mean it that whipping me would excite you, right? I don’t want it to be like you’re punishing me for something bad I did, I just want you to be doing it because it excites you, and I’m letting you do it because I want to please you… that’s what I mean by real.”
“Yes Jack, it would be real just like that.”
“The fantasy I’ve always had,” I went on, “is that you’re nice to me about it. I know that sounds funny but I mean… feeling that you like me, you’re grateful to me for letting you hurt me because you enjoy it so much. You’re even a little apologetic about it, always in my fantasy the woman says something like, ‘I’m sorry about how much this is going to hurt, but I really want to do it.'”
“Karen,” I added, “I don’t mean to be topping from the bottom, like it’s called, but that’s what really excites me.”
“That’s all right Jack, everything you’re telling me fits in with how I’ve thought about it, everything! I’ve read about Loving Dommes and I think that’s what you’re talking about, and that’s what I’d want to be. In my fantasies I think about… loving you for letting me do these things to you.”
“Karen… I think we really want the same thing.”
“I’m thinking that too Jack.”
“There’s more.”
She brought her hands up to my face and pulled me to her, whispering, “Tell me.”
“If you want,” I said, screwing up my courage once more, “you can whip my cock.”
Karen pulled back, her eyes wide as she looked at me. “Are you serious? Oh God, wouldn’t that really hurt?”
“Yes, but it would be a real pain and pleasure thing. You’d have to… make me hard so you could whip it. I come back to that in my fantasies a lot, a woman making my cock hard, and it would feel so good but I’d know she was only getting it ready to be whipped, it’s like I love that conflict.”
“Jack… that is so hot… I can hardly breathe,” she said, her face getting flushed.
“And I’m hard as a rock,” I said, taking her hands and bringing them down to my bulging crotch again. “Oh wow, I guess you really do want this,” she said, squeezing the raging erection under my jeans.
“Jeez, my head’s spinning thinking about whipping your cock, I never thought of that before. I’m getting wet Jack… God, are we a couple of perverts or what?”
“Nothing wrong with being perverts, I love that all this excites you Karen,” I said. Then I smiled and added, “I can’t wait to see how wet you are.”