Ben
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(Spring Break, Late March)
“I must be nuts,” I said out loud for the 500th time in the last month. Kitten looked at me and laughed. She continued to bounce alongside me, holding my hand as we made our way to the Magic Kingdom entrance. It was early and the crowds were, well, slightly less insane. One of the benefits of staying at the resort. You could get in a little earlier and you didn’t waste time trying to get to the park, find parking, and then make your way to the entrance, all so you could wait for an hour.
Six weeks earlier and shortly after she stopped squealing at me over the phone, I told Kit she was in charge of planning our time at Disney. She accepted and promptly took a deep dive into Disney planning. The one time I asked if she wanted me to take a look at what she had planned I got a look that would freeze rivers.
I stopped asking after that. As of this moment, I had little idea of what she had planned and whenever I inquired, I got a “trust me, Daddy”. But now that we were at Disney, I was a little nervous about how well everything she had planned would hold up.
Despite being told I was behaving like a grumpy old man the trip so far was remarkably smooth. I was concerned her ongoing “adorable tardiness” might make an appearance when trying to get to the airport on time for catching our flight. But Disney will focus a girl. We were there in plenty of time, and aside from the usual long lines, delayed flights, and cramped seats, the trip from Montreal to Orlando was surprisingly drama-free.
I didn’t even have to get into a fight with her to get a decent night’s sleep once we arrived at our hotel in the park. She wanted to be well rested for her big day. I thought she’d be up half the night bouncing off the wall, but to my surprise, she was out like a light before 9.
Of course, that meant she was up around 5 am. Fortunately she let me sleep in as she got ready.
Her Disney debut outfit was a black halter top with a flared red skirt and white polka dots. Her collar was a red and white scarf around her neck. She was even wearing a sensible pair of sneakers, knowing how much walking was ahead of her today. All of this was topped with a wide brimmed hat with mouse ears. She desperately wanted to buy and wear a regular set of ears, but recognized that they didn’t offer much shade. And when you’re a fair complexion redhead in Disney, you need all the shade you can get. I still worried about her exposing too much skin so I spent 20 minutes this morning with a squirming little girl putting enough sunscreen on her so she could probably stand next to an exploding nuclear bomb and not get burned.
I got a lot of huffs and exasperated “Daddy…”, but it was not negotiable. I have travelled with cranky sunburnt people. It is no fun.
I was slightly worried about a potential weird tan line around her neck, but one war at a time. Hopefully the sunscreen would prevent that from happening.
She was adorable. She knew she was adorable, which meant she could get away with a certain amount of teasing.
“I never knew you were nuts, Daddy. It’s a complete shocker to me,” she said. “You’ve always made such rational decisions.”
I lowered my sunglasses and shot her a look which made her giggle. Then she got up on her toes and kissed me, which always helped. We also got at least three scandalized looks from other people in the lines around us. Once upon a time that would have worried me, now it just amused the hell out of me.
“Come on, Daddy. It’ll be good. It’ll be the fun kind of nuts, I promise,” she said.
I couldn’t help but laugh at her playfulness. ‘The fun kind of nuts.’ Oh yes. There was no doubt that most of the last six months has been the good kind of crazy, which was a pleasant change from the previous two years of really bad crazy. Reestablishing my life, buying a new house, finding new love even if it was in the package of a 20-year-old, frequently bratty, little girl.
But the decision to take that bratty little girl to Disney might be topping my nuts list.
I was trying to shove those thoughts into a deep corner of my brain. I didn’t want to have them. That was the old me. The one who overthought and planned for everything. I just wanted a week, at Disney, with my girlfriend. I just wanted to keep this miraculous streak of happiness rolling.
I wanted the good nuts. Absolutely.
Because I already had a best friend recently explain to me why I was just plain, straight-up nuts.
****
(Toronto – Two weeks earlier)
“You are batshit insane for doing this,” Meg said, sipping a gin and tonic, her drink of choice when she wanted to tear into someone a bit, which was normally always. I was nursing a diet coke instead of a pint. Happy or not, I just couldn’t touch alcohol these days. Not since the accident. I’m not sure I ever would again.
We were at a bar we always liked to hit in Kensington Market. It was laid out weird, but you could always find a cozy corner to have a conversation. It was also the perfect spot to introduce Kit to a select few of my Toronto-based friends. They weren’t all huddled around her like she was on display. Instead, we could move from table to table and chat with small groups.
Despite telling her that it wasn’t tit for tat, and she didn’t have to go to Toronto just because I was taking her to Florida, Kit insisted on going for a few days. She thought it was about time she met a few more of my friends. Plus, she figured the longer she was a mystery, the greater the likelihood of her obtaining mythological status.
“It can be fun being worshipped, Daddy, but there are limits,” she said.
At the moment, she was talking to a couple of the women from my former policy shop. She appeared to be holding her own, even if the intricacies of infrastructure policy were a little outside of her interests. I think it was more likely they were trying to determine it was true that she tried to tear the face of their boss’s wife. This provided the perfect window for Meg to pull me aside and do what she’s been wanting to do since we arrived the night before… question my sanity.
“I am not insane. There’s a method to the madness,” I countered. She raised her eyebrow skeptically. It would work better against me if I didn’t know how long she had practiced being able to do that in law school. She thought it would be an effective tool in court.
“Look, it wasn’t the original plan, but this is what I have. It’ll be fine,” I added.
“Out of curiosity, what was your original scheme?” she asked.
“Look, she’s always wanted to go to Disney, so I thought it would be a nice treat. Originally I was going to do it at the end of the school year, but she’s landed a new job and she’s very excited about it and it starts right after classes end. Then I was thinking maybe at the end of the summer, right before classes start, but hey, a redhead in Florida at the end of August…”
She nodded her head. “Unless you want to turn her to ash, not a good idea. Ok…”
“So I thought, why not Spring Break. A bit sooner than I had planned, but it gives her a break from Montreal and the slush, and a recharge before exams. Plus, things are going well so why not?” I said. There, that was a solid argument.
Meg shook her head.
“I enjoy the meticulous planning of your spontaneous decision,” she said, taking a sip from her drink in an attempt to hide her smirk. She failed.
I casually flipped her the finger, which was my way of admitting defeat to her sarcasm.
“So I’ve explained my reasoning. Explain why I’m a mad man,” I said.
Meg put down her drink and leaned across the table. She held up an open hand and began to tick the point off on her fingers. Again, effective, if I hadn’t been around watching her practice the stunt a couple of decades ago.
“First,” she said, tapping a finger, “the two of you have been together about five months. Staying at Disney for five days is a crazy amount of money to spend on someone you’ve known for that long. I know you’re doing fine, and you don’t like hearing that, but it’s true.
“Second,” she said, tapping the next finger and not giving me a chance to address her point, “Vacations together are a huge step. It’s one thing for the two of you to be all cozy together in your love shack when there’s no stress or decisions to be made. It’s something else when you’re dealing with planes, hotels, and deciding who does what.
“Third, Disney is a zoo. It breaks people’s will to live. People who have been together for years can start screaming at each other like lunatics because the line to Space Mountain is too long. You’re going there with someone you’ve only just started dating. You and Beth nearly killed each other there once and you had been married for years.
“And fourth, yes, you’re happier than I’ve seen you in years. But I worry about what happens if someone scandalized by the two of you being nauseatingly affectionate together given your age difference. You and that cane make me nervous. And for good reason,” she said, sitting back in her chair.
“One time I try and kill someone with my cane, and I’ll never live it down,” I said, attempting to bring some levity to things.
“Don’t,” she said, her stare squashing the idea of joking about it, before it got too far. Fair enough.
I sighed. Knowing Meg, she had practiced her arguments in front of a mirror before coming here and had also practiced shooting down my counterarguments. Great lawyer, loyal but occasionally frustrating friend. Spectacularly shitty wife. At least she learned her lesson after the second marriage.
“Look, I’m not going to say those aren’t some valid concerns. But I do have to get out there and start living my life and you know I have the money. Plus I know what Disney is like. We’ve done comic cons, and while they’re not the same, we are somewhat familiar with being stuck in an overcrowded space filled with unhygienic lunatics all wanting to do the same thing at the same time.
“Besides, she’s doing most of the planning at the park, and she’s been diving face first into it. Anytime I ask if she needs a second set of eyes, I get a death glare, so I’m content to follow her lead,” I said.
“And you’re both ok with that arrangement?” she said.
“Sure. Of course,” I said. I got the raised eyebrow, but she moved on to the topic that tended to worry her the most.
“And your temper?”
I leaned across the table to look her in the eye. I had been joking before, but I want to emphasize how serious I was. “Unless I run into that piece of shit on the ‘It’s A Small World’ ride, I think I’m safe. Besides, it’s not my temper you have to worry about…
As if on cue.