Chapter 35

Book:Claiming My Ruthless Alpha Published:2024-12-1

Casper
Minutes passed, and the bottle remained on my lips as I froze, contemplating my decision.
I wanted to end my life.
I wanted the suffering to come to a halt. But it was impossible as Lilith kept appearing in my head.
I didn’t know how it happened, but it was crazy.
I tried pushing her image off my head, but it only grew stronger, reminding me of our bond.
Despite shying away from it, I think I’ve started to bond with Lilith. Killing myself would hurt her.
Her eyes stared at me as if warning me.
I would be selfish if I drank the poison.
She saved me from death twice. Maybe this was a sign. Maybe she was here because of me.
Most importantly, maybe it was not time to take my life yet.
I withdrew the bottle from my lips, focusing on Lilith’s teary image that reflected in my head.
In a short time, she took over me. All my thoughts revolved around Lilith.
Though it was a good thing to feel a sense of responsibility towards her, in order to keep her safe, at the same time, I was afraid.
I didn’t want to make another mistake.
I understood Raphael’s concern towards me. He wanted the best for me, and I appreciated that.
But I couldn’t find myself pushing her away.
Every day I spent with Lilith made me grow weak emotionally. I can’t help it.
I’ve tried to shut myself in my room for days, but my legs wander to hers.
The urge to see her cheerful smile, her sweet vanilla scent, and her beautiful face lingered in my head.
It filled me with a sense of calmness and helped with my mood swings.
But it didn’t stop fear from grinding through my heart.
A series of questions tore through me.
Raphael was right.
I was developing feelings for Lilith. Nothing scared me more than that.
After the incident, I vowed never to have even the slightest feelings for any woman, let alone fall in love.
But Lilith was making me break my rules.
It was something that I had never done. I never go back on my words.
Aside from that, the thought of Marina was on my mind.
Having feelings for Lilith meant I was disrespecting Marina, and I felt terrible about it.
Marina died because of my foolish decisions, and the last thing I wanted was to yearn for another woman’s affection.
Marina was my mate, and no woman would take her place in my heart.
Not even Lilith.
My face hardened as I ground my teeth before hiding the bottle of poison in my wardrobe.
After today, I would be aloof with Lilith in order to keep my mental health stable and avoid Raphael’s accusations.
It was better than firing her.
My eyes wandered around before resting on a pill that sat on the bed.
Then it clicks on me. I was supposed to have given Lilith a pill to ease her pain the night she ran away as guilt ate me up after hurting her.
Giving it to her was the best thing.
I walked out of my room, shutting the door before glancing around.
It seemed Raphael had left after our misunderstanding.
I saw Anna coming out of Lilith’s room with a smile on her face before hugging her.
Thank goddess she didn’t bump into me like she did earlier.
I didn’t want her questioning me like Raphael.
I knocked on the door, waiting patiently. Tossing the pill in my hands to distract myself, I fought the urge to burst into her room, giving her some privacy.
“Alpha,” she stared at me with surprise in her voice.
“I know that you are wondering why I’m here again.” I started.
“I came to give you this,” I said, stretching the pills to her hand while maintaining a rigid look on my face. “And to also tell you that you don’t need to work until you are fully healed.”
“That’s so thoughtful of you. Thank you.” She responded, collecting the pills from me with a sweet smile plastered on her oval-shaped face.
I stifled a groan the moment the tip of our fingers brushed.
“That’s all, I’ll just take my leave,” I drawled, as I was reluctant to go, but I knew I couldn’t stay longer with her by my side.
I wanted to keep the relationship between us professional.
Her keen eyes watched mine for a few seconds before they dropped to observe my body movement.
“Is everything alright?” She asked, her eyes still fixed on me.
“Yes,” I replied curtly, turning to leave, but she held me back with her slim hands.
Arching my brow, I turned to give her a questionable look, stifling at her touch.
“I don’t like being touched, Lilith.” I warmed, using my Alpha tone.
“I’m sorry, I just felt something was wrong with you. Earlier, you were a bit of a lively version of yourself, but now, it seems you are mad about something. Was it me?”
“It’s not you,” I gritted my teeth, despite knowing it had everything to do with her.
I turned, leaving her on the spot as I made my way upstairs.
“Then it must be what Raphael told you.”
My heart dropped into the pit of my stomach, and my legs were glued to the floor.
Pieces of my last conversation with Raphael flashed across my head, making anger stir up within me.
“It doesn’t concern you, Lilith,” I spoke in a gravelly voice. Dangerously low, yet terrifying.
“I know, but I can’t help it. Who is Alec? You guys kept mentioning his name.”
My eyes flashed red with fury, and I turned to her, grabbing her by her collar and lifting her until her legs couldn’t touch the floor.
“You have no business with my private life. The next time I catch you eavesdropping on our conversation, I will make sure that I cut your ears off!” I threatened, throwing her down before stomping into Marina’s room.
*****
Lilith.
Tears blinded my vision the moment he flung me down like a piece of paper.
I felt weightless under his arms.
Watching him walk away in rage pricked my heart with guilt.
I should have minded my business, and now I have made him cold to me once more.
I was certain he would believe Raphael and take his words to heart.
And I knew that once Raphael learned that the Alpha wasn’t on my side anymore, he would use it as leverage over me, to bully me and hurl insults at me.
I screwed up!
The thought of running to him to apologize, but I let it slide.
Rather than brood over him, I would enjoy the last moment when he was nice to me.
At least, I was the only person he cared about after the incident that happened 10 years ago.
I buried myself in my room for the rest of the day. Luckily, the Alpha had already given me his permission, and Anna dropped by with a plate of food.
Dark clouds invaded the sky, and I locked my door, preparing to sleep.
The atmosphere was peaceful and quiet except for the sounds of the insects and the hooting of owls.
I shut my eyes, sleeping immediately as tiredness hit me like a ton of bricks.
My lap and knees still hurt from the running last night when those men chased after me frantically.
Slowly, I started dreaming. Only then did it click in my memory that there were not 10 men, but 11 men. But only 10 of them waylaid me.
The last man was busy easing himself inside the woods.
After he peed, he started chasing after me with a silver knife, threatening to kill me the way his colleagues were gruesomely killed.
I jumped from the bed in fear as sweat glided through my forehead.
My heart raced fast, and my breaths turned into short pants.
Terrified, I switched the light on, sitting on the bed as I was afraid to sleep.
Fear clouded my heart as reality kicked within me.
I wasn’t safe.
The last man knew that I was alive because I heard his footsteps as he ran deeper into the woods, but I was occupied with the Alpha’s body which was almost turning ice.
He would definitely come for me!
I blinked back the tears in my eyes when I heard the sound of faint wailing.
Confusion washed over me as I got up from the bed, pinning my ear on the door to have better hearing.
The sound of a masculine voice flooded my ears. But it didn’t end there. The voice was laced with pain.
Panic sets in me when my eyes rest on the wall to check the time.
11:05 pm.
The rules flashed in my head, and the last experience I had with the Alpha kept ringing in my head. It was enough to discourage me.
Curiosity built up in me, and my eyes bulged out of their sockets when I heard the Alpha’s voice clearly.
Was he in pain?
Unable to hold myself in place, I bolted out of my room, stopping inches away from the stairs that demarcated the middle floor from the last floor.
The rules re-echoed in my head, warning me about the danger of being disobedient.