First, I need to process this news. I lean my head against the cool bathroom tiles, letting the reality sink in.
Later, I pace back and forth, wondering what I will do now that I know my fate. I don’t know if I should be happy, scream, or just feel down about the result.
I am pregnant, and I don’t know what to do.
This is too much for me right now. With everything going on between Logan and me, I never imagined things would go this way.
I walk out of the bathroom and slump down on the bed, staring up at the ceiling with thoughts racing through my mind. I can’t stay here and watch everything fall apart. I have to get out, even if it’s temporary.
I go to my closet, searching for comfortable clothes. After much contemplation, I settled on a sundress.
I comb my hair and tie it into a bun, glancing into the mirror. My eyes look pale and tired.
The signs were there all along, but I never paid much attention to them. I dab my face with a bit of makeup to cover the dullness.
I take a good look at myself. I know I look good. Yes, I’m beautiful, and I can’t let someone as handsome as Logan make me feel less.
I step out of the room, making my way down the stairs. Suddenly, I stop in my tracks. The sight before me feels like deja vu.
Logan and Samantha are locked in a passionate kiss, their hands all over each other as if they might do the deed right there.
Logan’s body stiffens as he senses my presence. He turns around, his eyes locking onto mine.
Samantha wears a devious smile, clearly enjoying the spectacle she has orchestrated. But I refuse to let them make me feel less than I am.
“Oops, my bad,” I say, my voice steady. “I interrupted something glorious. Please, go on. I’m sorry for walking in on you. Continue with what you were doing.”
Logan’s expression shifts from surprise to something unreadable. He opens his mouth to say something, but I don’t give him the chance.
Logan stands up, his eyes fixed on me as he starts coming closer. I step back, wondering why he is making his way toward me.
The more he advances, the more I step back until my back hits the wall. “Where are you going dressed like this?” he asks, his eyes taking in my outfit.
I look down at my sundress, realizing it isn’t bad at all.
It’s a short, flowery gown that falls above my knees. “What’s wrong with this outfit?” I ask, looking back at him.
“I’m going out,” I reply, with a steady voice steady despite the rapid beating of my heart.
Logan’s eyes narrow slightly as he studies me. “Dressed like that?”
I lift my chin, refusing to be intimidated.
“Yes, dressed like this. Is there a problem?”
“Don’t you dare walk out that door wearing that,” he says with a firm voice, and my eyes widened at his words.
“Hell no, I’m walking out that door wearing this dress,” I reply. “If you’ll excuse me, I have somewhere to be. I suggest you go back to her.”
Samantha folds her arms, giving me a devilish look that I choose to ignore.
His eyes are cast down, so I seize the opportunity to slip past him and dash toward the door. My heart pounds as I stride toward the door. I can feel his gaze on my back as I exit.
A driver stands by, ready to take me to my destination.
I nod in response to his greeting as I slide into the car.
“Where to, ma’am?”
“To the hospital, please. I need to see my mum.”
“Certainly, ma’am,” he replies as he starts the engine and navigates out of the compound.
Throughout the ride, my eyes remain fixed on the windshield, my mind racing as I try to align my thoughts.
“We’re here, ma’am,” the driver announces.
“Don’t wait for me,” I tell him as I step out of the car.
I head to the hospital lobby. The receptionist’s face lights up when she sees me; I’ve become such a regular that I don’t need to state any formality to gain entry.
As I get closer, I hear voices and pause to listen. The voice sounds so familiar. Straining to hear, I realize it’s my father.
A lump forms in my throat. I haven’t seen him since the episode when I refused to marry Jake, and he hasn’t reached out since.
Unsure of how to feel, I take a deep breath and make my way inside.
I push open the door to my mother’s room, my heart pounding. My father stands by her bed, his back to me.
He’s speaking softly, but as soon as I enter, my mother’s face lights up with a smile, which makes my father turn around.
“Come here, my love,” my mother calls out to me, her eyes beaming. I take in the room: just as she described, it’s filled with decorations, teddy bears, and cards.
I smile inwardly, noting that my father has made an effort to win her heart again. I know my mother will gladly accept him back; she loves him dearly.
My father finally turns to face me. I can’t quite name his emotions, but I see regret in his eyes.
“Nadine,” he says, opening his arms in invitation.
I stand there, skeptical and unsure of what to do. I’ve never felt the kind of fatherly love from him that Nathalie seems to receive effortlessly.
While she always has his attention, I’ve often felt overlooked and craving the same affection.
Seeing my hesitation, my father’s eyes reveal regret.
“Nadine, come here,” he beckons softly. I glance at my mother, who gives me a reassuring nod. Slowly, I move closer and hug him.
Oh, how I longed for this love years ago. How I wished he could see me the way he sees Nathalie, how I wished I could ever do something to earn his admiration.
My eyes welled up with tears, but the truth is, I’ve buried my heart over his lack of love and lived as though I didn’t have a father.
He pulls me away slightly, looking into my eyes. His own is wet, and I can see he’s trying not to cry.
“I’m sorry, Nadine,” he says, his voice trembling. “I’m sorry for all the years I haven’t been the best to you.”
I want to say, “Don’t you think it’s too late for this?” but I bite my cheek, holding back the words.
I swallow hard, trying to keep my emotions in check. The years of hurt and disappointment weigh heavily on me. While his apology is a start, it doesn’t erase the past.
With everything I’ve been through, I’m not sure I’m ready to let someone just waltz back into my life after causing me so much pain.
His decision that day changed the course of my life. I wouldn’t have met Logan, and my life wouldn’t be as complicated as it is now.
Yet, amidst the turmoil, I cling to a tiny hope, the life growing inside me.