88

[REBECCA]
My legs bounced up and down almost frantically. In their nervous movement, a random rhythm was found. It matched the beating of my pounding and wildly racing heart.
If the bouncing of my knees were not enough to show my anxiety, then my hands showed it clearly. My trembling hands rested on my lap, my fingers clenching tight, and then unclenching around the fabric of my dress.
It wasn’t a surprise that I was slowly going crazy with tension.
After all, I was sitting at the piano, waiting for Artemy to make his appearance.
It had been two nights since I last played the piano. The last two nights, it was Artemy hoping that I would come to the piano room and play for him. And now, it was me waiting for him.
Was he going to come? Or was he angry at me? Was he going to make me wait, like I did to him?
With each passing second, I was growing more alarmed at the thought that Artemy wasn’t going to come.
What was he doing right now?
Did he receive my note?
The flower?
Did he smile while reading it? Was he happy about them?
Or did he ignore them?
My lips turned down in a frown at the thought of him refusing my gifts. But then I shook my head. “Stop it, Rebecca,” I muttered.
As soon as the words were out of my mouth, I heard a sound at the door, and my head snapped toward it.
There he was. Artemy.
He was standing tall, his hands resting on the door as he struggled with his breathing. It appeared as if he had run all the way here. There were beads of sweat dotting his forehead, a few strands of hair clinging on his skin as his eyes fixated on mine. His breathing was almost frantic, his eyes presenting a wild look as he walked further inside.
I saw him swallow nervously several times, his throat bobbing up and down with the movement. Artemy walked to his sofa chair, which was directly in front of the piano.
Taking a seat in his usual spot, he extended his legs forward in the exact same position he would take every single night while I played the piano.
We didn’t say anything. There was only silence.
But the silence between us was enough. It was always enough. We only needed each other’s presence, our eyes on each other. Words were never needed to express what we were feeling.
So I kept my eyes on him, and he did the same.
Blue to green.
Taking another deep breath, I tried to relax my tense shoulders, and I placed my trembling hands on the piano keys. My touch was light, barely even touching. My fingers softly moved over the keys, and my mouth curved up in a small smile.
I missed this.
Not just the piano, but this moment between just Artemy and I.
I missed him. His presence, his smile, his twinkling bluish steel-colored eyes. I missed everything about us.
So I played.
While we never took our eyes off each other, I played to him like I did every night. I played for us.
The music flowed, cocooning us in its warmth. A sweet, gentle melody. Something I had learned while I was trying to escape the darkness that Raffaele would always throw me in.
It always brought me peace, but in this moment, I wasn’t doing it for me.
I was doing it for Artemy, hoping it would bring him peace and ease the pain I had caused him.
I didn’t have much to give him, so I gave him the only thing I had. The only thing I knew I had. Something I had treasured close to me for years.
After playing the song once, I played it a second time. My eyes caught Artemy’s shoulders dropping as he started to relax in his sofa chair. A breathy sigh escaped past his lips, and the pained expression on his face slowly started to fade away, until he was staring at me with soft eyes.
I melted into his stares, my heart accelerating as I took him in.
As the song came to an end for a second time, I paused, my fingers laid gently over the keys as I breathed. Artemy stayed still, and he waited for my next move.
Slowly pushing the bench away, I stood up and walked around the piano until I was standing in front of it, facing Artemy. There was nothing between us. I just had to walk a few steps and I would be in his arms.
And that was exactly what I did.
One second I was standing away from Artemy and the next, I was right in front of him, standing between his spread legs. My knees touched his sofa chair as I looked down at him.
My eyes moved over his hard, muscled chest and then down the length of his arms until they landed on his right hand.
He was still holding the flower I had given him.
A single white peony.
His fingers were wrapped around the stem like he never wanted to let go. But even then, his hold looked almost gentle, as if he was scared to ruin the delicate flower.
I choked back a sob as my eyes moved to his other hand.
He was holding the note I had sent him before coming to the piano room. I knew what it said. I had stared at it for hours before finally having the courage to send it to him.
‘Please come to the piano room. I want to play for you.’
That was what it said. Simple words, yet it meant a lot to both of us.
Glancing away from his hands, I looked into his eyes again. Without giving it another thought, I sat down on his lap, settling myself sideways and leaning against his chest.
I felt Artemy’s shocked breath, and then his arms were around me, so quick that it took me by surprise. He crushed me to him and buried his face in my neck.
My name was barely a whisper against his lips, but I heard it. I felt it. Placing my head on his shoulder, I wrapped an arm around his waist.
We were both silent for a few moments. Artemy kept his face buried in my neck, and I felt him place a soft kiss there before tightening his arms around me.
“Rebecca,” he started, but I squeezed his waist, stopping him.
“Just let me talk, okay? I need to say something,” I replied.
“Okay,” he readily agreed. “Whatever you want, Rebecca.”
Moving my head from his shoulder, it forced him to shift away from my neck too. I sat up straight on his lap, our faces a few inches apart. My hands came up to cup his cheeks, my fingers rubbing gently over the slight stubble.
“I’m sorry,” I whispered.