Adea
This gentle side of him is off-putting and I don’t think I’m going to get used to it any time soon. His large fingers on mine don’t make a difference, this new side of him that I’m seeing for the first time doesn’t erase all of the horrendous things he’s done. The way he’s looking at me doesn’t make him any nicer of a person. For Goddess’s sake, I just watched him kill a man and enjoy every second of it. Remembering that he’s asked me a question, I pull myself out of it.
“Your warriors didn’t know who I was and you weren’t expecting guests, so…” I trail off. Did I tell his guard, Duke, that I was his person? Yes. Did I mean it? Not one bit. Does that change the fact that Shane thinks I’m his person? No. Was I hoping to use that knowledge to my benefit? Yes.
Shane hasn’t said a word but he’s watching me. He’s got a look in his eye that is mesmerizing and with an intensity that’s troubling. I came here knowing that I would be alone but being here on Half Moon territory makes it all the more real. If I want to stay in his good grace, I need to put on the best performance that I can.
Shane’s behavior may be suspicious but the last thing I’ll be is a fool. Do I already think less of myself for coming here by myself? Yes but I’m not going to focus on that. I made the right decision coming here. I know I can do it. Will I continue to be a fool? No, no I won’t.
He’s got a dangerous air about him that makes you think you can change him. When that’s not possible. He isn’t someone who can change and he isn’t someone I should want to change.
He is alluring and as much as my battered woman syndrome wants to believe it, I’m not enough to trust him. He’s not my person, he isn’t my mate but there’s something that keeps pulling us together.
I don’t know if it’s fate, destiny, or even the abuse that ties me to him. The only thing I can trust about Shane is his obsession with me. He’s not a good man, he isn’t even a good person but I can put my trust or faith in how crazy he is over me.
Shane moves quickly but before I can react, he pushes forward, my legs are on both sides of his torso. The hands that gripped mine are gone, one is on my thigh and the other is wrapped around my throat.
My back straightens and before I can react, I’m pulled in as his lips crash against mine. Shane’s tongue darts forward, he forces his way past my lips and into my mouth. When I gasp, I taste and smell him.
He chuckles and his eyes open slowly. He stares at me with darkened eyes and I swallow as his tongue caresses mine in a sensual dance. He holds my gaze as he claims my mouth as if it were always his.
He’s no longer the boy who stole my first kiss and left me confused. No, now he’s a man that greedily takes what’s his. His kiss isn’t sweet or kind. It’s nothing like what I’m used to. Instead, it’s rough, demanding, bruising. It’s so very Shane and I don’t know why I’m surprised. It’s not like I expected him to ask, that’s never been his style.
I can’t help but feel guilt run through my body as I kiss a man that isn’t my mate. There’s a big caution sign flashing in my mind. Everything in my body is screaming that this is wrong.
Korra has long since tried to speak to me. She stopped talking to me the moment I pushed her back and stopped her from reaching out to Ethan. The only person I’ve explored with, have been comfortable enough to be intimate with or kiss was Ethan.
I’m used to the sweet, love-filled kisses that keep me warm at night. The kind that has butterflies exploding and fluttering around in my stomach. I’m used to the way he holds me close like he’s afraid to lose me, tells me he loves me as if he’ll never be able to say it again, and promises to stay by my side.
I’d never compare them because there’s no comparison between Ethan and Shane. They are two completely different people and I’ve had two completely different experiences with both.
Yet, the man in front of me is kissing me as if he’d burn down the world to keep me like he’d lock me away and melt the key so I’d never be able to escape from him again. My heart belongs to Ethan but I can’t help but notice the way Shane is or the way he loves. Dark and twisted it may be but love in his own way it is.
I take a deep inhale of breath because I’d forgotten how to breathe. I’d gotten lost in his spell, lost in the way his eyelashes almost brushed against his skin, and the way he almost looked innocent at this moment.
The sun is setting and it was casting shadows along the room. Shane’s eyes are closed and for once, I get the opportunity to study him without being under his intimidating gaze. There was something about staring at a beast when it wasn’t aware. He was lost in our exchange of wet lips and
What was it about him? Was there a story about us? Before? Was there a reason why he was so obsessed with me? Was there something that explained it? Was there anything explanation that would make it make sense? Was there anything that could make it okay? There was nothing that came to my mind that would excuse it. Shane’s kiss deepened and I fought the urge to sigh.