In my mind, the safe house didn’t resemble what I saw. Rather than feeling like a sterile bunker, the environment was a quaint cottage, situated outside of town surrounded by a colorful show of wildflowers and shielded by old oaks. Witnessing the sunset from the porch fade the sky to bright oranges and pastel pinks, I noticed a hint of irony. My surroundings were the most scenic I could have dreamed of; still, internally, everything felt uncertain and out of order.
It has been two weeks as of now since the downfall of the Phoenix Organization, and two weeks since I joined with Lucy and grasped abilities that I continue to struggle to understand. Two weeks spent trying to merge two lifetimes of memories, two emotional sets, two varying personalities.
I shut my eyes while feeling the soothing evening breeze on my skin. To my mind, I could still picture The Architect down on the floor, and could hear the gunshot that ended the life of The Raven. The memory made me shiver, and I tightly wrapped my arms around myself in an effort to combat a chill that wasn’t due to the weather.
“Brianne?” Sounding soft, Alessandro’s voice emerged from a position behind me. “Here’s some tea if you’d prefer to have some.”
I glanced up to find him behind the doorway holding two steaming mugs. His dark eyes seemed to be filled with concern, but there was an absence of pressure in his look, along with no expectation. Just an unnoticed small gesture of reassurance.
“Thanks,” I said while I managed a small smile and grabbed a mug. The heat permeated through my hands, finding me in this instant.
Leaning on the porch railing, Alessandro cradled his own mug. He didn’t utter a word and made no effort to create conversation.
He didn’t hold any conversations and didn’t promote it. He was just… there. An unchanging, encouraging force that has become more important to me than I can easily articulate.
Together, we stood in comfortable quietness, overlooking how the final rays of sunlight disappeared, and the first stars shone in the night sky as it darkened. I drank a sip of the tea, understanding the calming synthesis of chamomile and lavender that Alessandro had begun making for me each evening.
I whispered, “I had yet another memory moment today.”
Alessandro turned towards me with a look of consideration that was not invasive. “Lucy’s?” he asked gently.
I nodded. She said that was from the days she spent in college. Being nervous to the point of considering passing out, she was giving a presentation on theoretical physics. But then she started sharing, and it felt like the universe bent over backwards for her. She understood how everything was related, and how the smallest components were joined to the immensity of galaxies.
A small smile appeared at my mouth as I thought of-Louise thought of-the excitement of that time. “It was gorgeous,” I muttered. “And terrifying.”
Alessandro considered thoughtfully. “Having so many new memories and experiences all suddenly in your head has to be an overwhelming feeling.”
I let out a shaky laugh. “Not even beginning to cover it is inadequate for describing it as overwhelming.” I occasionally get up and doubt which memories are my own or belong to Lucy. And then there’s the power…”
Looking down at my free hand, I drifted off. If I paid attention, the energy was clearly thrumming just below my skin-the cosmic force that gave me the power to affect reality. Following that evening in the lab, I had refrained from using it out of fear of what might take place if I lost command.
“Have you tried… using it?” Alessandro asked hesitantly. “The power, I mean.”
I shook my head vehemently. “No. I can’t. What if tearing a hole in the universe happens by accident on my part? I can’t say with certainty what I am capable of.
Alessandro contemplated for a minute. He pointed out, “When I first engaged in martial arts training, my senses said something that has stayed with me forever. ‘A weapon you don’t understand is harmful,’ he said. But, just as he said, “knowledge of dangerous things brings control.'”
I raised an eyebrow when I looked at him. “Are you telling me to simply… try out my abilities?”
He chuckled softly. “Not exactly. Still, it is possible that completely attempting to suppress it is not the solution either. “Maybe the answer lies in slowly understanding it as the way to take control of it.”
He said something that rang true within me-that place that was Lucy, the scientist intrinsically wanting to understand and delve into things. Nonetheless, the part of Brianne, the frightened girl in this impossible position, was unchanged.
“I’m not certain I’m prepared for that,” I recognized.
With an understanding expression, Alessandro nodded. “There’s no rush, Brianne. Healing takes time. “You’re managing more than most people could begin to consider.”
I experienced a flood of gratitude for how patient he was, and for the fact he never pressed or required anything. During the disorder of the past two weeks, Alessandro was a stable support, consistently offering a cup of tea, calming words, or just a comforting presence when the silence became overwhelming.
I murmured, “Thanks, Alessandro,” after that. “For everything. I have no idea how I would have dealt with these recent weeks without you.”
He grinned, a comfortable, real smile that could be seen in his eyes. “Isn’t that just the role of friends?” Besides, I am simply here to make tea while occasionally delivering fortune cookie wisdom.”
His humor directed at himself shocked a laugh out of me, and this time it rang true. It was pleasant, as if it were a letting go of stress I wasn’t aware I was experiencing.
As my laughter dimmed, I really began to see Alessandro. With the soft halo of the porch light, I recognized the goodness in his eyes and the mild curve of his smile. I caught a fleeting sensation of… something. There was a pleasant feeling in my chest, that was completely independent of the tea.
Still, a reminder of Chase popped up-the way he betrayed me and the pain that resulted-which prompted me to swiftly set the feeling aside. I wasn’t ready for that. Not yet. Maybe not ever.
It looked like Alessandro caught on to the change in my mood. He said, “It’s starting to get cold out here,” while straightening up. “Want to head inside? I guess there’s still a little bit of yesterday’s chocolate cake left. And we could probably go and see Zoe.
I nodded, thankful for the interruption. “Cake sounds perfect.”
Entering the building, I took a look at our image in the window-Alessandro and I together. In some way, we observed… right next to each other. Just like two puzzle pieces that match flawlessly.
My parents wanted me to marry him. The idea was both exciting and scary to me. I wasn’t able to take a careful look at those feelings, especially in light of everything else I was dealing with. But as I watched Alessandro cutting generous slices of cake, his movements confident and caring, I allowed myself to acknowledge one simple truth: I was glad he was there. Whatever might follow in the way of challenges to my new identity and powers, I was aware that I wouldn’t be going through them on my own.
And for now, that was enough.