I had never experienced this before, and I can’t discern how bad it might be.
I’m in Donovan’s arms as he sleeps on the couch.
I noticed how he resisted sleep last night, wanting to continue our kissing session as much as I did. He never once removed his hands from my body, even asleep, he’s adamant about keeping them there.
I could see he was wearing the same shirt he had on the day we first met, or rather, bumped into each other. His scar on his neck still draws my attention as it did back then, as does the tattoo that goes down his shoulder.
He breathes with a beautiful tranquility; seeing him so vulnerable and gentle is new to me. Asleep, his facial expressions relax. There’s no furrowed brow, no pursed lips. Watching him like this is glorious, almost divine.
Time isn’t my strong suit, but I must have been awake here for at least five hours since I woke up… Perhaps more.
I still don’t have the courage to take my cell phone out of my pocket, I know I must have missed calls from my aunt and Cris.
I already had to tell Donovan that Cris was gay, but I found it amusing that he felt jealous of him. If Donovan only knew that no one else could interest me, I’m aware of how guys look at me and none have caught my attention… except for one.
It’s because of what happened with Shawn, it must be. Just two years ago, I swear half of the school seemed attractive to me, but since what happened that night, I wasn’t able to look at a man and feel any attraction towards him.
Until I saw Donovan.
From the very first moment, he attracted me like no one ever has, that should have been a warning.
And it was.
I took precautions, tried to distance myself, but we ended up finding each other. Most of the time, it was my fault, however, when I made up my mind and decided I would never have anything to do with Donovan again, he sought me out.
I didn’t want to fall in love, but it happened. The way my heart beats when I’m with him is not normal, neither are my nerves, my skin, my blood, my whole body reacts when he’s around.
I hate it.
Nobody should have enough power to alter my emotions, and the bastard has it.
I turned my face enough to plant a kiss on his cheek and fell back asleep.
I felt the same cold feeling as the last time I was here. Donovan wasn’t by my side, again.
My eyes instantly welled up with tears.
He couldn’t have left me again.
I got up and saw another note on the kitchen table, right in the same spot as the first one.
I was called away, had to go and didn’t want to wake you. God, I didn’t even want to leave that damn couch.
Anyway, I’ll be back before 5PM, you can wait for me and maybe we’ll go get something to eat? Only if you want to, I know you have to go home at some point, but, I don’t know, maybe you don’t want to just yet?
Damn it, Alicia, this is more than I’ve written all year, I don’t know how the hell you can make me unable to write you a fucking letter without sounding pathetic.
I’m not good at these things.
Wait for me if you want, or not, I don’t know.
You know who it is.
I couldn’t help my idiotic smile as I read each word. I never thought Donovan would be like this, in fact, before becoming his friend, I would never have believed he was capable of telling me half of the things he’s told me.
I checked my phone to see the time. I shouldn’t have.
It was 7PM, he should have been back two damn hours ago.
When another hour passed, I couldn’t stand it and texted Cris. I wasn’t angry, just… shit, I was furious.
“Can you pick me up?”
“Can you come to the party with me?”
“Are you kidding?”
“Are you kidding?”
Sometimes I hated Cristian’s humor.
“I’m asking you a favor!”
“And I’m asking you to drink some mojitos!”
“I haven’t even showered.”
“Then shower!”
“I’m not at my house, genius, why would I ask you to pick me up?”
“Where are you then?!”
“With your mother, and she orders you to come pick me up.”
“I’d heard weird noises in her room lately, now it all makes sense…”
“Cris!”
“Okay, okay, I’ll come to pick you up wherever you are, but you’re going to the party with me, you can shower here and I’ll give you some of my mom’s clothes.”
“No.”
“Enjoy walking alone on the streets at night.”
“Fine! I’ll go!”