My hesitant hands reach for his nape and pull his face closer to deepen the kiss. His tongue delicately enters my mouth, we merge into one another. My heart is bursting out of my chest. Heat rises to my head. He sucks and nibbles my lower lip while his hands move to either side of my face and I press closer to him. Abruptly, Donovan wraps one arm around my waist and pulls me to his body, we shudder. A simple caress is so stimulating for me, a kiss is another level of fascination.
Damn, I’ve never felt this, I’m going to die of a heart attack or get burned, one of the two, his touch was already too much for me, but this doesn’t compare. I’m trembling, begging for a little more.
“Holy mother of all that’s good…”
I unconsciously bite his lip and can hear a small moan escape his mouth. He takes me completely, at this moment, I feel totally outside myself, letting myself be carried by Donovan, he is consuming me and I love it, everything at this moment I love.
In a hasty incline, he takes me by the thighs and lifts me, I willingly adjust my legs around his waist. We do not stop kissing at any moment, not when he started to walk, nor when he kicked the door shut, his hands were too busy on my back and waist to close it with them.
Donovan sits on the sofa and I straddle him, he rolls me with his arms possessively and pulls me so close that we are fully attached to each other.
The problem was when I felt his erection beneath me. I shivered and squirmed. The sensation was perfect.
He stopped kissing me and I moaned in protest. I didn’t want him to stop kissing me, especially not now.
“You’re going to hate me if we do this,” he murmured trying to push me away, but I don’t move.
“What? Why?”
“If you knew… I can’t do this to you. It’s not fair to you. You deserve the entire heaven, Celina, and I’m going to hurt you a lot.”
I didn’t answer him, he’s the best thing that’s ever happened to me, I hated that he despised himself like this, he was an incredible guy… when he wasn’t angry, every time we have the chance he says something looking to hurt me, he can’t help it, it’s his method of defense.
He and I should never have met, I should be in my room studying right now. My plans, my mother, I should be focused on that, but I can’t change the past, we’re here, and I feel things that I can’t control.
“Do you want me to leave?” I asked, smiling inwardly. I know he won’t allow it.
“That would be the sensible thing to do.” He just responded.
“Alright,” I obeyed, pretending to get up.
He abruptly pulled on my hand and drew me towards him. “Stop throwing yourself at me, Alicia, I’m asking you to leave and you keep insisting. You really are heavy.”
Hard and beastly – as is Donovan – he kissed me again. We were both on fire and I was the one who was going to get burned.
It’s the first time in years that I feel like a teenager. My emotions can overpower my coherence and that scares me more than anything.
We stayed on the sofa hugging, kissing most of the time and the rest just enjoying each other, every touch, every look, was perfect.
I was falling asleep and the last thing I remember was when he took an acoustic guitar – I’m not sure where from – and began to sing, I was sure that he thought I was sleeping by that point. It felt almost like a lullaby with his voice, but no, I knew it was much more.
*Donovan Sings demons – imagine dragons *
When the days are cold and the cards all fold
And the saints we see are all made of gold
When your dreams all fail and the ones we hail
Are the worst of all, and the blood’s run stale
I wanna hide the truth, I wanna shelter you
But with the beast inside, there’s nowhere we can hide
No matter what we breed, we still are made of greed
This is my kingdom come, this is my kingdom come
When you feel my heat, look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide, it’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close; it’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide, it’s where my demons hide
At the curtain’s call it’s the last of all
When the lights fade out, all the sinners crawl
So they dug your grave and the masquerade
Will come calling out at the mess you’ve made
Don’t wanna let you down, but I am hell-bound
Though this is all for you, don’t wanna hide the truth
No matter what we breed, we still are made of greed
This is my kingdom come, this is my kingdom come
When you feel my heat, look into my eyes
It’s where my demons hide, it’s where my demons hide
Don’t get too close; it’s dark inside
It’s where my demons hide, it’s where my demons hide