“Love, babe. Please, calm down,” he says, covering my mouth and his eyes teary.
Fake tears, damn it! Fucking fake tears!
I started to hit him, and he lifted me completely off the floor. He took me to the bathroom, pushed me against the wall and put his hands on my wrists, immobilizing me.
“Samantha! Calm down!” he yells in my face and a tear slips down his cheek.
I stopped screaming and closed my eyes. I took several deep breaths.
“I gave you everything, damn it! Everything! Every damn part of me fell on you! You have them!” I yelled at the top of my lungs and the crying returned” Tell me that everything you said is a lie, please “I begged him, my voice breaking more with every word.
He didn’t answer, he just took my hand and guided me to sit on the toilet.
He cleaned the wounds on my hands, arms, and knees. I could feel how his hands were shaking as he did it.
I was also shaking, the hiccups didn’t let me stay still.
After every trace of blood left my skin, he tried to lift me, but my legs weren’t working. The bathroom floor seemed very attractive to lie down and cry all I have to do.
He lifted me over his shoulder and placed me on the bed, gently. I lay looking at the ceiling, put my hands over my face, and didn’t know what else to do. I have to leave but I want him to tell me again that he doesn’t love me. That it was all a lie. I need to hear it again. One last time…
He took the hands off my face and looked straight into my eyes.
” I’m sorry “he says and puts his forehead against mine.
” Did you lie to me? “I managed to say with my voice broken from so much screaming and crying.
He doesn’t answer and kisses me. My head says to fight with all my strength to push him away, but my heart and soul want him close, they want to take all his being, and keep everything good and beautiful he ever told me under a thousand locks. I grab his hair and make him get a little closer to me, trying to take everything I can from his lips.
His warmth always calmed me down, and even though the warmth I felt when we were together was a lie, fake, I wanted to have it forever.
I open my mouth and he opens his. I can define anew that both of us are making love with our mouths, our tongues dancing to the beat, making a perfect combination and mismatched synchrony.
His arms pressed me closer to him, he bit my lower lip and moaned over my mouth. I grabbed his shirt in my fists and did everything possible to remove it.
I wrap my legs around his waist and he lowered a little more to feel the swelling that is his crotch. He stops kissing me and bites his lip to swallow the moan that was about to come out of his lips. Instinctively he pushes his hips towards mine, making both of us more desperate to experience the feeling of him, inside me.
He started unbuttoning my shirt, rubbing his knuckles on my stomach as he did. He seemed to be doing it slowly, enjoying every touch his skin makes with mine. As if it were the last time he enjoyed our closeness and our connection.
I helped him to remove my bra and followed that I traced a line of kisses from his shoulder to his neck and behind his ear.
He put one of my breasts in his mouth, and squeezed the other with his hand. He kissed and licked my nipples in the softest way he ever did.
I removed his shirt and kissed his chest. Our moans and ragged breaths filled the room. A very desperate tension began to build in my sex.
He started to run his whole hand over my body, not gently, squeezing me. As if he wanted to remember how my skin feels under his hand, as if he wanted to memorize me.
Nick takes off my panties and massages my clitoris while he kisses me. I arch and whisper his name on his lips.
” So beautiful…” he says, running his nose through my neck and my hair. Inhaling, feeling, needing.
I lower my hands to his pants and boxers. I try to lower them, but he does it for me. I squeeze his butt, and bring him closer to where I need him most and where my body wants him.
The tip of his erection pressed against my entrance. He entered me slowly and bit my neck slowly, muffling his moan. He sighs my name. As if he had needed me since he walked out of that door, as if he had been longing for me.
I gasped and moved against him.
There’s something different in this. His way of touching me is so tender and desperate. I don’t see him with the determination he always had, with that firmness of knowing where to touch and how to do it. He touches me with fear that I will disappear, he touches me as if my skin were the greatest weakness he ever faced.
“You’re so tight… Always so damn tight…” he murmured in my neck. I gripped my hands in the sheets, but he grabbed my hands and raised them above my head. Intertwining them with his.
“I love you,” I told him.
He increased the speed of his thrusts, moving in circles, crashing against me.