Before he could continue, I got up, indignant and hot with anger. I approached him, and Henry stood still, waiting for my next move.
“I sacrificed everything for you! Aren’t you aware of that?! I let go of my family for you! I was willing to give up college for you! I was going to sacrifice everything I had worked for my whole life for you! And after I did all that… you left me lying on a bed like a cheap whore because you didn’t think you deserved me? Why didn’t you leave me before then?! I had to raise a child on my own! I had to crawl to my mother’s house for help! And you know what’s the worst part? SHE DIDN’T DO IT! She kicked me out, and I had to live in a motel for a week until I ran out of money, then Dave found me. Knowing I was pregnant, he still loved me! He stayed by my side when you should have been there! I wanted you there! I needed you so much, but you just left!”
“Anna, I…”
Sure, sure. Now he’s going to apologize, and I’ll forgive him, and we’ll live together forever, right? Well, it doesn’t work like that anymore.
“Don’t you dare apologize, don’t do it. I’ll never forgive you, Henry, never,” I shout in his face. His face contorts, and he stands up to be roughly at the same height even though he’s two heads taller.
“Don’t tell me that if I had stayed with you, Anna, I can assure you Jeremy wouldn’t be here with you now. The bastards who took me said what they would do to you if I didn’t work for them. Human trafficking, does that sound familiar?” I thought, “Just shut up, Henry.” He continued, “I’d prefer to be dead than to let something like that happen to you. I couldn’t allow it. What if we escaped? There would still have been a chance they could find us, Anna, and if they did, I couldn’t have done anything about it, and if I tried, I would have ended up dead and you in a brothel. These guys are the mafia, understand? If anything had happened to you, I couldn’t live with it. You can hate me as much as you want, but to this day, I don’t regret leaving. I wish I hadn’t, but I had no choice. Do you know how many girls I saw come out of a damn van, crying, begging for help, and I couldn’t do anything? And you know what? Every time I thought about coming back for you, which was every damn minute since I left, I saw you being the one crying and begging for help. I saw you, and I knew you could become that if I kept following you and ran away with you. I loved you too much, and I wasn’t going to put you in danger.”
Well, his words got to me, and I’m crying. I understand it; he did it to protect me. But I don’t want to understand it; I don’t want to. I simply know that if he says anything more, it will change the way I feel about him. I’ll probably let him back into my life, and I shouldn’t allow it. It’s been too long; I shouldn’t still feel anything for him, and I don’t understand how I still do.
“Henry, just stop,” I managed to say, covering my face with my hands, trying to stop crying with all its truth.
“I won’t stop a damn thing!” he roared, taking my wrists and forcefully removing my hands from my face. His face was red, and his eyes welled up with tears. “Do you know how hard it was for me not to wake up next to you in the damn mornings? Not seeing you? Not hearing you? Do you have any idea how many times I’ve wanted to send everything to hell just to have you? My life, everything. Every damn thing meant nothing without you, Anna. I hate that you don’t understand it and that you don’t believe me when… when I’ve experienced firsthand what it’s like to suffer when you’re missing everything that brings you life. You say you suffered more than me? I don’t think so because Jeremy is and was your strength. He kept you strong, while I had not a damn thing to hold onto. It was just me and my damn broken heart. So don’t say you’re the only one who suffered in this because you have no idea what I endured without you, and to make sure they didn’t either, the things I had to go through…”
Without needing to hear more, I decided to send everything to hell. Willingly or not, every damn word changed everything. So right now, I pressed my mouth to Henry’s to shut him up. He let out a groan and took a step back, as if the kiss had been a slap. He quickly composed himself and grabbed my hips, pulling me back onto the couch with him. Once I was straddling him, my tongue urgently requested entrance into his mouth, and he didn’t hesitate for a second. In this moment, these actions, I can describe them using an old definition of mine… We were making love with our mouths.
I pull away from his lips to catch some air. He groans in protest, and I laugh. The subtle caress of my tongue in his ear makes him shiver. He holds me with one hand on my waist and the other on my back, kissing my neck. The effect of his cologne on me is fascinating.
The notion of time becomes irrelevant for us. It’s truly exciting how our bodies draw so close, making us seem like one, and then they separate, only leaving our hands intertwined. At times, the distance prompts his hand to slide a little down my hip, and we gaze into each other’s eyes, not speaking but conveying all the unspoken words with caresses and glances.
We are oblivious to the world, to external reality, lost in our own time and space. I love the strength of his arms as he presses my body against his. He lifts my dress to my waist and lays me on the couch. He kisses my stomach, and I tremble with pleasure at that simple but very familiar kiss. I take a handful of his hair in my hand when he raises the dress even higher, exposing my breasts.
“How the hell can they be even bigger?” he exclaims.
I laugh but don’t reply. He doesn’t expect an answer either. He puts his mouth on my nipple, and I swear to God I nearly scream. It feels so good, his tongue sucking, swirling, and caressing…
Without waiting for him to move away, I sit up and remove my dress completely. The look in Henry’s eyes makes me reconsider if that was a good idea. He’s looking at me as if he wants to devour me.
Henry takes off his shirt, and I literally lose my breath. He’s so beautiful… He takes me by the waist and lifts me onto his shoulder. He carries me to the bedroom and tosses me on the bed.
When he lies on top of me and my breasts brush against his chest, I put my hand on the back of his neck and bring his forehead close to mine.
“Will you leave me locked up, alone, this time?” I manage to say in a hoarse, agitated voice.
“This time, I’ll leave you locked up, with me.”