Hot tears streamed down my cheeks, my breathing was off and I was gasping for oxygen. I quickly glance at myself through my rear view mirror, mascara was running down my red cheeks, blood was dripping down the side of my forehead, my lip was busted and was a mixture of purple and green.
I parked my car in front of the driveway, I left my car running with my keys still in the engine. I banged on the door while carefully looking around at my surroundings, I was afraid that he might come back to finish me off.
The door opened and my heart dropped to my stomach.
What the hell. My mom grabbed my shoulders pulling me inside, her hands traveled up to my cheeks lifting my chin up.
I’m sorry, I’m so sorry. I should have listened to you and daddy. I cried.
My moms worried eyes scans over my injuries , she shakes her head a little.
You told me not to go out that night but I did, I should have listened, it’s all my fault mommy. I broke down, sob after sob as my body trembled viciously.
Footsteps echoed around the stairs, my dad eyes enlarged when he saw me. He approached my mom and I, he placed his hand on my mom’s shoulder. Her watery eyes glanced up at his, my moms lips quivered a little. She had no idea what it was but she was still worried for me, she was afraid of the truth.
I was raped that night.
My dads hand dropped from my moms shoulder, she slowly looked back at me.
And-and he came back to finish the job today. I wiped my tears.
My dad almost collapsed but he held himself up by griping on to the table behind him, my mom had tears streaming down her cheeks.
I’m sorry, daddy. I grabbed his hands, falling to my knees in front of him. My dad looked down at me, his eyes softened as he bent down to my level bringing my hands to his lips.
It’s okay, baby. My dad whispers. Tears rolled off his cheeks, he softly kissed my forehead. It’s not your fault.
My mom fell to her knees right next to us, hugging me tightly in her arms. My dad wraps his arms around the both of us while combining back my untamed hair.
Who did it ? My dad asks, there was a hint of anger laced through his voice.
I shallowed the huge lump in my throat, I wasn’t sure if I should tell them without talking to Victoria first but I couldn’t hide this anymore, I needed help.
Jakob Tuffin. I whispered.
My mom pulled away looking down at me. Victoria’s fiance ?
I nodded, my mom angrily looked at my dad. My dad was already up on his feet, he pulled his phone out of his pocket and raised it to his ear.
Meet me at Oatley Street. My dad speaks in to his phone, his knuckles were white from holding his phone so tight in his hand.
That’s where Jakob lives, what is he going to do ?
I’ll be back. My dad says.
I grabbed his hand. What are you going to do to him ? I questioned.
I’ll just have a word with him, than when you feel up to it we’ll go down to the police station. My dad whispers softly.
My mom slowly helped me up to my feet, she sat me on the couch while my dad was grabbing his coat off the hook. My mom wiped her tears and grabbed ahold of his elbow before he could leave.
I want him to suffer, I want him to suffer more than death itself. She tried being quiet but I heard every word she said.
Not even in death he’ll be able to escape me. My dad whispers angrily.
He glanced at me before leaving, my mom stared at the empty doorway, her fist were tightened in balls. She turned back to face me with a sad smile.
Let’s take you a shower. My mom whispers.
I nodded, she helped me up the stairs to my old room.
She cares that much for me that she is willing to bring death upon someone.
She made sure the water was a perfect temperature before I got in, I sat still inside my tub not being able to move a muscle. She softly scrubbed my arms, my legs, my stomach, the blood off the side of my head. She was humming a song that she use to sing to me when I was smaller, it made my heart melt.
All this pain I was going through for the past two years is over, my parents know. They didn’t hate me for it, my father didn’t disown me like Jakob said he would, my mother didn’t slut shame me like Jakob said she would. He’s a liar and a rapist, he is nothing but dirt itself.
Tears filled my eyes, happy tears. I was finally free from him, from the lies. My mom rubbed my tears away, I glanced at her.
You will always be my baby, no matter what. My mom says. I love you so much, my sweet little girl.
I hugged her, she hugged me back not caring about getting her outfit wet. My head softly leaned against hers.
Slow tears rolled off my cheeks as I watched the water drip from the drain to my bath.
I love you too, mommy.
Three years later
After all the scandal that happened with Jakob I thought it was best for me to finish my studies in Paris with my grandparents. Jakob was arrested shortly after I left serving a minimum of ten years in prison, I guess I wasn’t the only girl he raped. The first two months living with my grandparents Victoria called me everyday but I never answered, I was too ashamed and broken.
I had to heal myself before I could heal anyone else and that’s why I never contacted Faust, how could I love someone without loving myself first, it was nearly impossible. I went to therapy, I met new people, I grew up and learned how to love myself.
I’ve been cleaned for three years, I haven’t had an ounce of alcohol and I’ve never felt more alive.
What are you thinking about ma raison d’etre ? His arms wrapped around my waist, I glanced over my shoulder with a soft smile. (Translation : my reason for being.)
I’m going home after leaving without notice, I’ve been gone for three years. I whispered.
He turned me around with his arms draped over my waist, his hand softly lifts my cheek up.
I’m going to be right next to you the whole time.
I longingly looked at him, his eyes were such a captivating brown color. He was perfect, he’s a perfect boyfriend, perfect best friend, perfect provider.
I love you, Rhett. I told him so sincerely and filled with emotion.
I love you more. He smiles while softly pecking my lips. I exhaled into the kiss, his fingers pushed back my hair as his hands rested against my cheeks.
Rhett was my therapist for a bit, he helped me through a rough path and I soon realized that I could actually love someone like him. He’s only two years older then me, he’s nerdy in a cute way, he can’t see without his oval glasses, he reads and studies for fun, he wears long sleeve cotton shirts with warm tone cardigans.
I’ve gotten quite comfortable with his cotton shirts.
We packed up everything in our small condo, it was hard saying bye to the place that happened me the most. It was even harder for Rhett, he grew up in Paris, his family and friends are here but he was willing to sacrifice all that for me.
My mom and dad are finally separate and with other people, today we’re all having dinner. My mom and I have created a great relationship over these two years, my dad finally realized that family is over everything even work.