He flexes his hands. Over and over and over for a minute. Maybe I shouldn’t have taken his comfort tissue away. “Do you love her?” he asks after a long minute.
I don’t have an answer.
Not one I’m ready to admit, anyway. Not to him, not to her. And certainly not myself.
“Ah, I guess I have my answer,” my brother says.
“What?” I snap.
He tucks his lips over his teeth, trying not to laugh. “I’m just saying you answered my question.”
I frown. “No, I didn’t. I didn’t say a fucking word.”
This time he doesn’t bother to restrain the laugh. “You did with your face.”
“We have the same face, bro!”
He throws his hands up in the air. “That’s how I know! That’s how I know all of you fucktards.
You’re my blood and flesh. Literally.”
And we laugh. Because what else do you do in a situation like this? I could punch him, but My-Linh will never forgive me if he’s got a black eye in all the wedding photos.
Finally, when the laughs fade, I say, “I don’t know what I’m doing. I just know that if I don’t try, I’m going to regret it for the rest of my life.”
He cocks his eyebrow. “So, you thought you’d try it at your brother’s wedding, who also just happens to be her ex-fiance, whom she blackmailed into leaving the bride so he could marry her?”
“Touche.”
He sighs, reaches over, and pats me on the back. The simple gesture makes my whole body sag with relief. I haven’t wanted to admit how much his silence has stressed me out the last few weeks. I hate fighting with all my brothers. We so rarely do. We’ve just put so many measures in place, in our personal and business relationships, to help avoid that, that most things can be settled with an open talk.
He lets out a long breath. “I don’t trust her. But I don’t have to. You do.” He searches my eyes for the truth. “Do you?”
“I think so.” A part of me niggles, maybe questioning if I can really trust someone after only truly knowing them for a few weeks. “Find out.”
I nod. He’s right. And then I ask the question I came here to ask. “Can she come to the wedding? She won’t if you don’t want her to. She’s not a bitch.” Damien snorts.
“Okay, fine, but she’s not cruel. Anymore.”
He’s about to answer when we hear a stampede from the bathroom and look over to see Kingsley and Kylian file into the room, having obviously been eavesdropping and deciding the serious part of the conversation is over.
Damien rolls his eyes at them before saying, “As far as the wedding, it’s fine by me. But I’m not the one whom you have to talk to about that. I’m just the groom.” He looks serious again. “And it really is up to My-Linh. All of it. If Clarissa’s going to be a part of our lives, she has to be okay with it. I love you. You’re my big brother. You’re literally my flesh and blood. But make no mistake. My-Linh is my heart and soul. You know the choice I’ll have to make if she’s not okay with this.”
I would expect nothing less from him. “No problem, My-Linh adores me.”
Kylian snorts and slaps me on the back of the head. “Maybe. But her henchman might not.” “Shit.”
CLARISSA
I
don’t realize I’m just sitting staring out the window until there’s a gentle knock on the door that pulls me out of my thoughts. It’s been almost an hour since Matthias texted; it must’ve been a long
talk for him only to be coming back now.
“Come in.”
There’s a pause before the door handle turns and it reveals My-Linh standing there with a bag.
“Hi,” she says nervously. “I wasn’t sure I should come. You probably don’t want to talk to me. I just wanted to drop off some drinks and food. I thought you might be thirsty.”
“Actually, I’m parched,” I admit. “Please, come in.”
She holds the bag out to me. I look inside. There are bottles of water and soda. And a bag of Caramello Koalas. She can’t know.
“Thank you,” I say gratefully. “I’m sorry. I’m really not here to cause any problems. I….. I couldn’t be alone. It’s hard to explain.”
This is a surreal moment. I’m not entirely sure I’m awake. I’ve spent so much time hating this woman. And here she is, on her wedding day, making sure I don’t starve to death.
She shakes her head kindly. “You don’t have to explain. I believe you. Can I come in? I don’t know where everyone has gone, and Kiara’s trying to find someone to play poker with to work out some of her stress so I need to hide.””
I gesture into the room. “You’re the bride.”
She doesn’t sit, just stands next to me at the window, as we watch a little sparrow pick at a rose.
“I won’t take up too much of your time. I just have two questions. You can answer or not, it’s up to you.” I just nod. Her face looks determined. “Why did you do what you did to Damien?”
A long exhale whooshes through my lips. She didn’t come to play. And I have no intention of sugar coating any of it. I’m past that now. I can’t ever move on if I don’t take accountability for what I did.
A deep breath.
“I was a very different person a year ago. I was unhappy. I didn’t know who I was. I was cruel and selfish. And Damien had reneged on our deal and I was mad. Back then, I cared how people in our society thought about me. I hated the things that everyone was saying behind my back, hell some of it was right to my face. I couldn’t get a date to save my life. I was Damien Baxter’s ex. No one wanted to touch me with a ten-foot pole. It hurt my ego in a hundred different ways. So, I hit him where it hurt, his family, his company.”