Kamara’s POV
“Ouch.” I yelped as the needle pricked my finger.
Chantelle hurried out of her room in concern, her eyes searching around like she expected to see a stranger lurking around. “What happened?”
“Was I that loud?” I asked, surprised at her reaction.
She huffed, plopping onto the couch. “Well, it has been really quiet around here and that yelp had me jumping out of my skin.”
I chuckled, returning my attention to the dress I was making. “Just admit that your head hasn’t been in the right place lately.”
“I could say the same for you, Kam. You have been drawing designs and making dresses like you have some kind of deadline that I do not know about. What is going on?”
I kept my eyes focused on the sequin material I was working on. It’s been over two weeks since I had sex with Diego. The memory of it would have been harder to deal with if I wasn’t drunk on both nights. My skin crawls at the thought of what I have had to do these past months to get money. This isn’t who I intended to be. It is also more depressing that there has to be an outcome in place.
If there is one thing I would really love to do, it is to go to the edge of a cliff to either scream or throw myself down wherever it might likely lead. I am beginning to regret my actions every passing day. And accepting that this is what I signed up for makes me dread the many days to come. Before losing my mind, I have chosen to stick to drawing up designs and sowing, only that can help my raging mind.
“Kamara,” Chantelle called out with a tap on my hand.
“Owww.” I let out when the needle pricked my finger again.
“Oh, my goodness! I am sorry.” She mumbled, reaching for my hand to have a look.
I took my hand back, sucking on the affected part. “It’s okay. I am used to this sort of pain. You just never get used to the sudden yelps that leave your lips when it happens.”
“Sorry. But I need you to talk to me, Kamara. I already feel guilty that I made you follow through with this in the first place.”
Her eyes revealed the turmoil she was feeling inside. I don’t deserve a friend like Chantelle, she is so worried about me and I on the other hand am making it all about myself. I pouted, dropping the dress.
“I am just so irked by my own presence, Chan. I feel ashamed of myself for doing all of this for money.” I wept. “What will my family say when they get to know about everything? What if I bump into one of them after lying that I traveled to New York? And what if I don’t fall pregnant? What am I going to do?” I broke down letting it all out.
Her comforting arm wrapped around me tightly.
“You keep forgetting that you are not in this alone, Kamara. I promise to stick by your side even during the hardest times. Please. I am sorry that you had to take this route. You know if I could help I wouldn’t hesitate to. And you need to stop thinking negatively, you will fall pregnant and get this over with in no time.”
I glanced up at her trying to desperately hang on to the thin thread of hope. “Are you sure?”
“I am very certain.” She beamed brightly.
Our moment was disrupted by the message notification that popped up on my phone. My heart raced at the content of the message. Chantelle frowned and stretched her neck out to see what had me frozen.
She kissed her teeth after reading through it. “That bastard!” She screeched. “Who the fuck does he think he is? Give me that phone so I can give him peace of my mind!”
I held onto the phone tightly, shaking my head in refusal. “Of what use will that be? At least he is sensitive enough to not probe me every time.” I tried to sound like it wasn’t serious knowing Chantelle wouldn’t bat an eyelash to respond rudely to Diego.
He had sent a text to ask if I was feeling pregnant just yet. It sounds so absurd to get such a message from a man that I barely know.
“Are you sure?” She questioned giving me a suspicious gaze.
“Yes, believe me. I am more desperate to know the outcome than he is.”
She cupped my face in her palm. “Just let me know if you need me to pull some crazy shit.”
I couldn’t resist the laughter that rumbled through my belly. “Do you not fear your insides getting blown out with bullets?”
Chantelle snickered. “Oh, please. We are all going to die anyway, so I might as well die for a cause.”
“Don’t be stupid.” I chuckled
She huffed, smacking her lips. “When was the last time we ate out? I am thinking we should visit that restaurant you love so much and get some Chinese food.”
I shook my head. “You know I am supposed to avoid going out now.”
“Does that matter? None of your family members will come around here at this time of the day. It is late.”
I glanced at the door in concern like it might burst open for no reason. And an unwanted guest will walk in. “Really? You think we can do that?” I asked.
The idea of eating some Chinese food already had my tongue yearning.
Chantelle made a face. “Stop asking for reassurance like a needy old lady. I will get changed, you should put on a hoodie and cap then we can get going.”
“Why do I need to wear those specifics?” I was genuinely perplexed.
“Are you dumb? Didn’t you just complain about getting seen?”
“Oh, that.” I grinned sheepishly.
She cackled. “You are something else.”
“I will just get ready since the bill is on you. I will let you direct me as you wish.”
Letting out her tongue at me, she snorted. “Whatever!”
I sighed managing a smile. When we arrived at the restaurant, we were lucky to get a booth that shielded us well from the rest of the customers. But we didn’t seem to hide well enough because Brandon was able to find us somehow.
“There you are. Hey stranger.” He grinned at me.
I gave Chantelle a questioning look and she spread her arms out to say it had nothing to do with her.
“What are you doing here, Brandon?”
He chuckled awkwardly, “There is no need to sound so cold. I caught a glimpse of you two when you walked in. Wasn’t sure you were the one but I did see Chantelle well enough. I have been trying to reach you, Kamara. I was just worried about you. Why are you avoiding me?”
I let out a slow exhale. My mood is not the right one to tolerate or accommodate anyone aside from Chantelle.
“What do you want anyway? As you can see, I am fine. You were not there when I needed you the most when we were together. So what is with the sudden affection? Please, we only came here to eat and be filled. We can’t be bothered.”
There was sheer pain on his face and instead of guilt, I felt glad that I could hurt him back after everything he had done to me. I saw Chantelle mouth an apology to him causing me to cut her a glare. She gulped and returned to her meal.
Brandon eventually left leaving us by ourselves. Chantelle knew better than to bring it up, so she did what was expected of her and discussed an entirely different topic which I genuinely appreciate.