“Yeah, they’re pretty amazing.”
“Are you a fan? This is the first time I’ve seen them live. I didn’t know what to expect really. I didn’t know how a band would sound without any vocals, you know?”
“And it turns out better than you would ever guess. Um, yeah I’m a fan, but I’m also covering them for a story.”
“You’re a journalist? Oh, you’re the one who wrote that piece in the Journal! That’s a great piece. It’s actually what got me to come along to see them.”
“I’m glad you liked it.”
I didn’t know how to tell her it might be the last thing I write about the Rock Chamber Boys.
***
“Emily! Emily!” I hear my name over the beginning chords of their next song and pivot to the right to see Carrie running toward me.
And then she says the words that make my blood turn to ice slush in my veins. “Where’s Ben?”
“What do you mean?”
“Well, he was just there with me in the tent, and then he saw you walk past. Before I could grab him, he’d run out, shouting to me that he was coming over to you. I followed him, but he’s not here. Did you see him?”
“No!”
I spin around, scanning for Ben in the crowd. He’s small but I know I could pick out my son’s form in any haystack. The lights from the show sprinkle over the bodies, but it makes it harder to spot him.
“Oh my God, BEN!” Carrie yells out into the crowd, her voice lost in the noise.
“Where is he? BEN! BEN!” I shout, scanning the sixty feet between me and the tent’s entrance wondering what could possibly have happened to him in that distance.
“BEN!” I hear Carrie shouting, the desperation in her voice almost as stark as mine.
Oh my God, I can’t think. I need to breathe. I need to stay calm, and just find Ben. Stay calm for him. If he’s in trouble he’s going to need you to STAY CALM! I tell myself.
“BEN! Ben, come to Mommy, baby! Not a good time for hiding! Come out, Ben! Where are you?”
Someone bumps into me. He’s laughing and holding a can that’s sloshing in his hand.
“Please, have you seen a little boy, dark brown hair? He’s wearing a Spider-Man T-shirt, have you seen him?” I ask him.
“Sorry mate, I haven’t. Wanna swig?”
“No, thanks.”
Carrie runs up to me, her face is wet with a combination of sweat and tears. “He’s not over there. Oh my God. Where is he? He was just here, I swear. He wasn’t out of my eyesight for more than three seconds!”
“I know. Just, he’s here somewhere. I’m sure he is. You go over to that side and I’ll stay here in case he comes back, and try to get ahold of one of the crew. Get Hank or Hailey, they should be just over there.” I wave my hand in the direction of the huddle of our people watching the show.
I will myself to breathe. Each inhale stings like a swarm of bees in my lungs. But I tell myself I’ll pass out without it.
Where could he be? What if something’s happened to him, what if someone’s taken him?
The dread both sinks like a lead paperweight in my gut as well as rises the bile in my throat.
I spin, over and over, 360 degrees, 720, 1080, scanning every inch of the space around me, where Ben is supposed to be.
“Emily!” I hear someone call me.
“Hailey!”
“What’s happened?”
“We can’t find Ben!”
“Oh no! Okay, where did you guys see him last?”
“He was with Carrie and she said he saw me walk past and before she knew it he’d taken off. She followed but he wasn’t with me. WHERE IS HE, HAILEY? WHERE IS MY BOY?”
She grabs my shoulder. “Don’t worry, you stay here, I’m going to get some help. Just…just don’t go, he’ll probably pop up and you need to be here!”
In the background I can hear the band playing, but I can’t focus on what it is I’m hearing. It’s just noise and I’m trying to block it out in case Ben is calling for me. God, I wish I could hear his sweet voice right now.
Suddenly the music stops and the lights flash on.
It floods the crowd and the stage in a bright, bright light, I can almost see the lines and wrinkles on everyone’s faces around me.
There’s a stunned silence and then it’s like everyone’s speaking at once. The guys bunch up at the edge of the stage and then it’s Brad’s voice I can hear.
“Sorry, everyone! We’ve had to stop because we have a bit of a situation. There’s a lost child, his name is Ben, he’s about five years old, has one arm in a cast, and is wearing a Spider-Man T-shirt. Can everyone have a quick look around and see if he’s near you? Give us a yell if you see him. Come on guys, let’s all band together, okay? We don’t want to stop the show for any longer than we have to, but we’re not going to start up again until we find him. As you can imagine his mother’s a little distraught and frankly, we love the little dude too. Soooo…BEN ARE YOU OUT THERE? CAN YOU GIVE UNCLE BRAD A YELL SO I KNOW WHERE YOU ARE? Everyone else be quiet, please, unless you have him.”
The silence roars in my ears and I have to cover them until the white noise dissipates and I can focus on the sound.
There’s nothing.
I clasp my hands together and press them against my lips. A silent prayer is sent.
Please let my little boy be okay.
“Uncle BRAD! Uncle Brad! I’m here! It’s me, Benny!”
I twirl around in the direction of the sound, catching Carrie’s eye. She seems to have heard it too and it gives me hope that I’m not dreaming.
“Is that you, Benny Boy?” Brad booms into the mic, his voice mirroring the hope that’s rippling through me.
“Yes! I’m over here!”
A spotlight scans over the crowd and finally rests on a small blue-and-red clad figure. He’s waving with one hand, his good hand, as he skips toward the stage, everyone parting to make room for him. And behind him, Silas.
I run through the space in the crowd to catch up to them.
“I was just with my daddy, Uncle Brad. I’m okay! Your concert is super great!” I hear him chatting as he stands at the edge of the stage looking up at the band.
I push Silas out the way as I kneel down on the ground and gather Ben up in my arms.
“Oh my God, Ben, Ben, my baby, Ben!”
“Hi Mommy!”
The crowd erupts into applause and cheers and I hear someone play a happy little jig on their instrument.
“Ben! Where did you go? I was so worried. Mommy thought she’d lost you.”
“I wasn’t lost. I knew where I was all the time.”
Still holding Ben, I look up onto the stage. The guys are standing there grinning. Except for Brad. He looks so relieved, I think he might pass out. He’s leaning against Marius, one hand massaging the side of his forehead. I realize then that he loves Ben. I don’t know why, but he does.