*Danika*
I kept tossing on the bed unable to find sleep. Everything replayed in my head like some sort of CD that I couldn’t just format. Particularly Alonso’s aggravated face across the table when his mother said those horrible words. It was surreal. Then there was Paisley. Her anger, and the way it washed over her, overtaking her usual calm exterior. It all kept flashing through my head, refusing to let go.
I tossed to face the window, looking out to the dark night while listening to the creatures of the night’s noises tear up the silence. It soothed me somehow knowing that I wasn’t the only one who couldn’t find sleep. There were others out there who were so soaked in their reflection and trauma that they couldn’t relent to sleep.
My mulling was brought to an abrupt stop when I heard a slight knock on the door. First of all, I thought my mind playing tricks on me so I only flicked my eyes to the door, still reluctant to move.
Then it came again, this time louder. Or, was it my heightened senses that made it so? All the same, I stood from the bed and trotted to the door, having only one person in mind. Nevertheless, when I peeled open the barrier, my eyeballs widened with who I saw there. It was Paisley, her face dampened as she took me in.
“May I come in?” she crooned in a small voice, showing her inner struggles.
“Yeah, sure.” I shifted to let her in, my head going to fast play for many reasons she might have come here.
I closed the door and moved after her, praying so hard that it wasn’t what I was thinking. What if she has found out? What if she is here because she suspects something? How can I defend myself? Gad, Alonso!
She sat down on the only chair in the room, her sullen eyes looking around it. “I’m truly sorry for what happened to you, Danika. I didn’t even know about it.”
“It’s okay, it’s not anyone’s fault.”
“I know, but as far as you are here, it makes it our fault. Lance is a good Beta to Alonso, and I know he will not be happy to hear that some scarecrow had tried to mess with his mate that he had entrusted into our care before leaving.” I stood there eyeing her, making up my mind on what direction to take her sympathy. They make it look like I was so delicate and fragile. Even though Lance is my ‘supposed’ mate that doesn’t mean I was immune to harm.
But that wasn’t the issue. The issue was that I was still baffled. Did she come here to sympathize with me for what happened, after being tongue-lashed by Theresa downstairs? Or she was here for something else and is using that as her introductory statement before delivering the blow?
She exhaled and relaxed back on the chair, flipped her eyes closed as though tired, then softly unfurled them and scrutinized me. “Why are you still standing? You want me to leave?”
“No, no!” I went to sit on the bed, with a slight smile. I am almost losing this battle of hatred against Paisley. “I am just surprised you are here.” I reached up to tug down my bonnet mindlessly as heavy silence enveloped us.
“I know what you are thinking. After what Theresa did downstairs and yet here I am as if I didn’t just blow up there, right?” she inquired with a bit of edge to her voice.
“Yeah, I am,” I confessed.
She chuckled jovially. “This family is messed up, Danika. I am telling you because… even though I see it in your eyes that you don’t like me-for reasons beyond me, you have to know that for you to survive here, sometimes you have to let off your steam. If not, everyone would ride on you. They would stampede on you until you are nothing but a meshed loaf on the floor seeking redemption.”
This is the first time since I knew her that she was addressing me quietly. Almost all the time she was loud and bubbly, which made me feel that these people had gotten to her. But I feel worse for her because somehow she knows I don’t like her. And I was thinking otherwise.
“When I met Alonso first, it was just supposed to be a fling. Nothing attached. I mean, I heard stories of him and how much he doesn’t do a woman twice. But I met him and… fell instantly in love with his vibe; cold, distant, and a man of little words. Then we started seeing each other and he often called me back. It wasn’t because I was special, but because maybe I was the only one that helped sate his demons. He did shitty things to me, very hurtful things. Said mean things to me that a woman of my ranking was unworthy of, yet I took them.” A tear slid down her face.
If I say at this point I wasn’t moved to tears, I lied. I felt so bad and guilty that I was among those crucifying her even though I knew nothing about her. Now, what was I going to do?
She went on, “He told me point blank he was never going to make me his Luna, did I tell you that before?” she asked and went on when I lifted my eyes in thought. “He told me it was all for the fun that he was never getting married again. I was hopeful, still condoning his vile attitude and doing everything he asked of me.” She sniffed and wiped tears off her face, followed by a smug chuckle. “Have you ever wondered why I often wear red colors? It’s his favorite. The only color that turns him on. Why? Till date, I don’t know. I wear them, just to make him happy.”
Hmm, interesting. No wonder. And I have been wondering. Now I know why he sent me that red lingerie back then and why most of my new gowns were mostly red colors. I would have to ask him. Then a question crossed my mind. “Have you two still been like…” I clapped my hands together, unable to bring myself to say the fuck word.
Her face morphed into a wide smile. “I like you very much, Danika. You remind me of my baby sister back in my pack. Very silly, yet timid. She often tries to hide her true colors, still, I could smell the fire in her. Well, to answer your question, ever since he came back from the mission to that pack, our sex life has died to zero. I don’t know why, and when I tried to find out if he was going to see other girls, I saw none. The only thing that gave me hope was him declaring me to be his Luna.”
Then where did the alliance come in?
As if reading my thoughts she ventured on. “I had gone to my pack to visit my family the other day, meaning to bring an end to this madness.” More tears filled her eyes. “… that was when my… father told me he had gone into some stupid alliance with the Alpha King and there is no way I can leave him now…” she hissed, her watery eyes meeting mine filled with so much misery. “I felt so mad that he would go behind my back to do that. Fuck! I didn’t even know he knew I was having trysts with the Alpha King. And then he did that to me. It was really the worst moment of my life.”
“So what do you plan to do now?” I had to ask.
She started standing from the chair. “I have to do my father’s bidding and make sure the alliance is formed. And one more thing…”
“What?”
“My real name is Cleopatra. I just… I just figured since my father betrayed me, that I would leave behind the real me, embracing this new life that might not even be my own.”
“Why are you telling me all this?”
“Maybe because I need you to know that I am not that much of a bad person. And also because I like you.”
I sat there on the bed dumbfounded and watched her walk out of the room, her shoulders sagged like the weight of the world was upon her. I hate Paisley. I am not going to allow her to get into my head. Shit! Why am I feeling like maybe this wasn’t all her fault? Every single day comes with diverse revelations of their own. Shits that I don’t even know if I could handle.
Who am I to blame now? Alonso, who is bound to his duties as the Alpha King of 12 enormous packs or Paisley… Cleopatra, for being bound to her duties to her father? I stood from the bed, going to grab my robe. I need a breath of fresh air and maybe some answers to my many questions.
…