That’s when I remembered I fell asleep laying on Axel and I squeezed his shirt, attempting to tug him closer as I threw a low glance behind me. The other man was in here.
Why’s he angry ? Why’d he slam the door like that ? Was it me ? Did I do something ? Is he coming to hurt me for ruining his conversation yesterday ?
It’s okay, Angel, nothing’s going to happen to you. I won’t let anything touch you, Axel’s voice swept through my ears like a soft melody and I nodded, unsure why I felt so trusting to his words already.
Could it be my mother had never lied to me ? If she said she’d do something, she’d do it… I’ve never been lied to, Jade hates lies, and that’s why she was so angry over my father.
If I may… the man across the room paused, a moment of silence filling the air before he continued, Angelica, I can help with your anxiety. I used to suffer from it myself so I understand where you’re coming from, he stated. I hesitantly lifted my head, hearing Axel jump to answer for me.
She’s clearly uncomfortable with you, you can’t just magically-
I quickly nodded, cutting off his response and hearing the room go silent again. My stomach churned in fear I crossed a line and I clenched fistfuls of his shirt, more tears filling my eyes.
Are you sure ? He asked quietly and surprise filled me.
I have a choice ?
Slowly nodding again, I heard approaching footsteps and stiffened, whipping my head around and locking my eyes on his legs. He came closer and I froze, watching him come to a stop a few feet away.
Al-Axel needs to work, so we can go now, he said. I hesitantly stepped off Axel’s lap and took a step toward him, waiting a moment to see if he’d snap before taking another step.
I reached for his hand and softly grabbed it, feeling him rip away with a loud squeak and I yanked my hands to my chest. My breaths turned rapid and I widened my eyes, looking at the floor and wanting to get down before he beat me down.
Jade wanting me on the floor was one of the only things she did that was helpful to me. It didn’t hurt as much getting beaten into the floorboards when I was already on them.
It’s okay ! Just don’t grab his hand, Axel stood, softly placing his hand on my face making me flinch, though he ignored it by pulling me into his chest. I closed my eyes and felt my fear reach its peak before calming from the tingles transferring to my face.
I held Axel’s hand when he took me somewhere, why can’t I hold his ? I don’t understand…
It’s fine, sir, I can hold her hand if that makes her comfortable-and if it’s fine by you, of course, he rushed out the second part, clearing his throat.
He released a quiet growl-like noise in response that vibrated his chest and my face. I clenched my eyes closed at the angry noise, forcing myself to stay in my spot instead of cowering away.
I don’t want to be afraid anymore.
If she prefers, he said after a moment, slowly releasing me, her comfort is your top priority when she’s with you. I give permission to do whatever it is that appeases it, but I trust you’ll stay within bounds.
Yes sir, he replied, holding his hand out and I stared at it, shakily reaching out and grabbing it with mine. His hand was warm, but there weren’t pleasing tingles as expected and I frowned.
Is Axel my soulmate ? Is that why I like him so fast ? Is that why I want his touch ? My father always told me only a chosen few get soulmates, usually the ones in need of saving. He said you’ll just know if you found them, and I’m beginning to understand that. My father has gotten me through many of my mother’s awful tormenting… I just wish he’d come back to see how bad it’s gotten.
Go easy on her, Blaine. I mean it. She’s delicate, Axel added in a deadly tone and I tightened my hold on the man’s hand, feeling him give me a reassuring squeeze.
It’s my job to protect her as the Luna, sir, she’s in good hands, he replied, turning and pulling me along. I felt uneasy as soon as we left the room and my heart beat rapidly against my chest.
I want to go back to Axel.
This is where I came whenever my anxiety got bad. It’s a very calming place and it’ll do you good. That’s the first step to breaking your shell. Find your peace, he explained, releasing my hand and looking down at me. I frowned in confusion, scrunching my eyebrows together and fidgeting with my hands.
What I mean is find what relaxes you. That’s the start of the long road to recovery, he added and I looked up at the beautiful scenery, pretending as if he wasn’t there and already feeling myself begin to relax. Nature always calms me.
There was an ocean of trees just behind the clear pond in front of us, which was surrounded with many vibrant flowers. I felt a smile tug at my lips and I hugged my hands to my chest, jumping when I heard his voice again.
When you’re relaxed, I want you to close your eyes and take big, slow breaths, and after each one, tell yourself something positive. Do that ten times, he said, taking a small step back and I held my breath, feeling my relaxed state crumble in fear of his sudden, unmentioned movement.
I moved my gaze back to the pond and squeezed the shirt over my chest, forcing myself to close my eyes and take a deep breath. It came out shaken and I tightened my hold on the fabric.
I’m strong.
Taking another deep breath, my grip loosened and I felt some of the tension leave my face.
I’ll be okay.
I’m safe.
I’m important.
Opening my eyes, I grew frustrated that I didn’t believe any of my words. He said it would work. He said he’d help me. Why is it not working ? Why do I still feel like this ? I don’t want to feel this way anymore. I want to be normal. I want to be okay.
It takes patience, he said, seemingly sensing my frustration and I shook my head, feeling someone else’s hand find my shoulder and making me jump into him consumed with panic.
He stumbled under my force, his body going tense as I held onto him shaking involuntarily. I clutched onto his shirt, uncontrollable tears filling my eyes while I pressed my face harder into his warm chest.
Oh ! I’m so sorry, I didn’t know how easily frightened humans get, a woman’s voice stabbed into my ears and I pressed myself further into him, my breathing rapid in an attempt to keep my tears from exiting.
She’s working on it, he cleared his throat then put one of his arms around my back, sending needles of terror down my spine. When no pain followed, a huge amount of relief flooded me and the cold stabs in my back subsided, be cautious around her for now, okay ?
I peeked out at the girl and noticed she was glancing between us, a slow look of realization morphing on her features.
Oh my god, this is great ! I’m so happy for you, little bro ! She’s so adorable, the woman suddenly cheered, making the man holding me much more tense.
Uh-eh-no ! That’s not-we’re not-she’s not my mate ! He rushed out, stumbling over his words but one in particular lingered in my mind.
Mate ? As in soulmate ? They believe in them too ?
She’s not ? Then why are you holding her like that ? And why’s this human even here ? Does the Alpha know you’re out here tampering with a-
His chest suddenly vibrated with a low rumble and I squeezed his shirt, instantly causing him to fall silent.
Be respectful to the Luna, he put emphasis on the strange word and she gasped. I scrunched my eyebrows and tapped his chest lightly to get his attention, but he didn’t pay it mind because she started talking again.